Sketcher

Sketcher Nov 2018

My mind is infested with negative thoughts,
I have been bested by what I’ve come across,
A lying ***** that ******* left me to die,
But here you are probably questioning why,
A “kid” is dealing with problems such as these,
Sadly, I have been taught the birds and the bees,
How to love another, so the other loved me,
She took me in and definitely had me pleased,
Out of the blue, she kicked me to the curb,
Cause to her, love is nothing but a verb,
It’s a feeling that you do not mess with,
Or you get stuck in a mindset like this,
Yes, heartbreak is the most painful agony,
Next to the death of someone in your family,
It’s not her fault though,
It was my own hormonal mindset,
Now I am below,
A healthy level so I’m a threat,
To myself and I think I need a break,
I do not know how long this pause will take,
I explain my feelings in a collection of poetry,
Not just heartbreak but for the future I am in no hurry,
The two biggest things that cause my silent depression,
Things that I would rather not talk about or mention,
The future and heartbreak aren’t easy to deal with now,
Thanks for enjoying me, I will take my final bow,
I have decided to run,
Life isn’t fun,
Neither is the one,
That stole my love,
And left this hole,
I must raise above,
What she stole,
I’m not sure how,
This is possible,
But I vow,
I’ll find something plausible…
Stepson…
Find a gun…
Hurts a ton…
This isn’t fun…
On the run…
I’m done…

Probably just might.

#depression #heartbreak #heartbroken #future #scary #note #letter #run #running #leaving

Sketcher Nov 2018

Sometimes

Sometimes I feel like I'm completely passed it all,
Sometimes I stare out the window and watch rain fall,
Sometimes I listen to John Denver and sometimes Lil Peep,
Sometimes the pain is so awful I can not fall sleep,
Sometimes I talk about the very first time I fell in love,
Sometimes I talk about emotions and how they're disposed of,
Sometimes I realize that I am still falling,
Not asleep, but into silent dread, appalling,
Sometimes this silent dread is love and sometimes it's the future,
Sometimes I love life, but usually wish death would come sooner.

I fell in love. I'm still falling. The one I fell for isn't there to catch me. I guess I'll be falling for a while.

#love #pain #heartbreak #heartbroken #depression

Sketcher Nov 2018

Waiting For Breakfast...

The smell of butter, the taste of flour,
Children will mutter for half an hour,
Until everyone's food arrives,
Mouths full and away with the cries,
Of chattering people and loud music,
Eating is the only language fluent.

Made this while waiting for breakfast... Also, I know the last line doesn't make sense. That's the point.

#wait #waiting #breakfast #food #eat #eating

Sketcher Nov 2018

I Remember

I remember the day I came to meet you for the first time in early August,
I remember being invited back at least once every week for two and a half months,
I remember the special look you gave me and what it meant,
I remember how you sought human contact around me and how you acted henceforth,
I remember the awkward sliding beneath my legs and how it became a norm,
I remember the unrelenting clinginess that I so desired,
I remember you grabbing me by the arm and taking me somewhere nobody could find us,
I remember the moistness of your lips against mine,
I remember the full weight of your body on mine as you nestled against me,
I remember the regret you felt,
I remember the regret i felt once I perceived your shame,
I remember the persistent, yet subtle avoidance,
And I still come across your circumvention resulting in mass amounts of pain to this day.

My first poem (48th poem ever) that doesn't involve any rhyming.

#love #pain #heartbreak #heartbroken #sadness #depression

Sketcher Nov 2018

Tell Me

Tell me we should be hanging out more,
Then slash my heart like you're settling a score,
Tell me I'm one of your only friends,
Then avoid me and make it a common trend,
Tell me that we are one in the same,
Then play with my love like it's some sort of game,
Tell me to wrap my arms around you,
Push me away and go on to someone new,
Tell me that I am cute and kiss me,
Multiple times, then reject me and diss me,
Tell me that you would **** on my bed,
Love me in ways that get you stuck in my head,
Tell me that you don't want to hurt me,
Then do all of these things and then desert me,
Heart decays and my body is corroded, you honestly make me wish i was dead,
Nowadays, if I'm not being avoided, the most I get is a pat on the head,
You already knew what you were going to do and how I would react,
You still went through with your plan to make me blue and decided to attack.

All things were actually said and done.

#heartbreak #heartbroken #sadness #love #pain #depression

Sketcher Nov 2018

Her Perspective

"What a little ******* *****,
He’ll never come cross a chick,
That will wanna **** his ****,
So why the hell does he think,
My mouth gonna be his kink,
Imma let him drown and sink,
In his vast tide of loneliness,
**** his wavy-haired holiness,
Just there to steal his coziness,
Nah *****, **** the harmonious,
And **** humans, they’re odious,
Leave em’ rotting in moldiness,
Let em’ express their emotions,
And question all of their notions,
Cause they’re all losers and broken,
Why not speak, you’re all unspoken,
But let’s not cause a commotion,
Cause I think now we’re approaching,
The part where I tell you something,
When music had the bass bumping,
And mons push and our lips touching,
And to your **** blood was rushing,
I was high, think you’re disgusting,
******* *****, please become nothing."

Although the things that I said are probably not true,
I'm just seeing the worst outcome from her point of view,
Now I'm going off with my old friends and my new crew,
Starting a rap group called Dugtrio, gonna make our debut.

Thinking of the worst possible outcome.

#perspective #anger #angry #dis #fantasy #fantasize

Sketcher Nov 2018

Just A Haiku

Sitting here alone,
Feeling the pain of heartbreak,
As I write some poems.

Just a good ol' 5-7-5.

#haiku