I’m sorry
I opened your chest
I took a peek
And maybe a bite
I’m sorry
But you’re just not here
He’s sitting right here
You’re just on another plane of existence
I’m sorry
But I just can’t help it
I couldn’t wait
I’m so hungry

I familiarize myself with the feeling
Because home never felt so distant
I will familiarize myself with my body
And hug the tight curves
And soft imperfect flesh walls
Scarred bruised burned and cratered
This is what home is
This is where I will live
It shouldn’t feel like I’m moving in all over again
But I’ve wanted to move out so many times
I will listen to my arm
It whispers sweet nothings into the holes
Scattered across my body
I live in the walls that cover my eyes
I do leave often though
Not forever

I jump in and out of my skin
And I test what feels better
Being under a layer of flesh feels suffocating, yet safe and predictable
Watching the world from above
Feels confusing and exhausting
If I were to choose
I would live out my life
Under the soft blanket of flesh
Settling into my organs
And meaning the words that come out of my mouth
But it doesn’t seem like I have a choice
So I rapidly vacillate between the two
I’ll be vibrating till the grave

He stares at his phone
Blankly and unnerved
Unaware that his lack of activity
Is driving the other insane
The other stares at his phone
Tired and uncomfortable
He would like a way to cope
Regardless of how unhealthy it is
Love is only as real as pain is
So of course, love is just a fantasy

Hey can I say something a little crazy ?
I have this theory that we live our lives over and over again but it’s slightly different or drastically different every time, but the people in life can be mostly the same. Sometimes I feel an instant connection with people that I’ve never met before.
I dunno I’ve just never had this feeling be so strong as when I started talking to you?
I dunno I feel like I’m just floating in an endless void observing my life outside of my body but when I talked to you I felt...
Grounded?
I dunno.
I just hope you don’t leave me on read

Every text that isn’t you pulls me deeper down
I’m in a cool blue
Pool
Waiting for you to jump in
But you have a life too
I don’t know what’s taking so long
And then I remember you have a life too
So I’ll just wait and see what’s coming next
But please wait for me like I’m waiting for you
I’m almost begging
The waters freezing

im comfortable nowhere
i always want to go home but i never want to stay inside

he never fully understood what the warnings meant
he just detatched him and his soul
so he could witness his life from above

nowhere in my dreams
head on a pillow
going nowhere