I want to scream my love for you on rooftops,
For your face is haunting me
Stalking me in dreams,
Visions of you fill up my idle time
All I can think of,
Are all the things we have not yet done
Like kissing and lovingly caressing,
Being lifted up into boundlessly affectionate arms,
You make me sick,
In every good way
All I want to do is tell you,
But all I can manage is a whisper,
I'm stifled in your presence,
It's my literal hell,
To love someone so much,
But refuse to express it
But this is a chance that
If I missed it
No one would ever replace you,
And my heart, well, no one would be able to fix it.

Having Depression is like finding out that mermaids are real
It doesn’t make sense to you until you’re getting dragged to the bottom of the ocean
And then you think
Oh
That’s what this is
And I’m drowning now,
That’s just……… great
And eventually, with your last vestiges of breath left
You float back to the surface
And you’re fine.
And that’s it.
Mermaids stop existing again.
Because you never actually saw what grabbed you
You only felt the claws around your leg
The cold, clammy hands tugging
With a force that you could never fight against
But you never saw her
So it was all a dream
Right?
And it happens again and again
You are drowning again and again
Until the water begins to feel like home
And the only thing reminding you that you are alive
Is the burning in your lungs
And when everything you had balanced so very carefully starts falling
Off the shelves of your life
When your “mild” depression starts deciding it wants to be more
When being alone makes you feel dead inside
And when losing your cool for one ******* second makes you contemplate your own demise
When do you admit to yourself that you are slipping
You are sinking and just because you can slow your descent
Does not mean that you’re not still drowning
And at the end of the day just because it took you longer to get there this time
Doesn’t mean you aren’t still lying on the ocean floor
Devoid of light and sound
And if you had just climbed onto that now distant boat and sailed away
You’d be fine.
But climbing was too hard
And sinking is so much easier
And you’re scared that if you reach out
Your hands will feel clammy and cold
As they wrap around your friends throats
And drag them down with you
And you would rather rot at the bottom of an endless sea
Than let that happen
So you lie in darkness and wait
For a sound
The singular resounding sound
Of failure
And you slowly float back to the surface
Take a deep breath
And you’re fine.
Because mermaids aren’t real
It’s all in your head

It is nighttime.
The stars glimmer
in **** near
infinite distances and
directions,
sending out
static signals
that we may never hear,
emitting light,
we get to see
long after
they are deceased.
I would give you these
burning things.
I would send you safe
sparkling dreams
of space travels
and grand adventures.
If my hand could stretch
beyond the horizon
of a black hole
I would reach out
into the gravity field
and gift you
the unknown.
For a small smile
or merely the hope
that one day
past your pain
you will laugh again
and find sweet dreams
I would give you eternity.
But for now
all I have is poetry.
So, I give you the heart
of my words,
they are yours
to do with as you please.

Collect my tears
Steer them towards the residue of my pain,
Those years never to be regained
Blinded by open eyes,
Traumatized
Irrigate those memories,
Wash me free from my mental cemetery

For years I dreamt of you,
Did you dream of me?
I walk through the rain,
Daydreaming of your warm hand in mine
I look out into the distance,
Searching for a love which is profound

I am the ocean,
Swallowed alive
I breathe deeply,
Content,
Mesmorized by you, a boy
Heaven-sent.

Let me wrap you in my shadow,
Within it's embrace you shall find your long lost solace
Paradoxes and ambiguities
Are what make me

Stuck within an endless cycle of time,
How could I ever unwind,
Or decide,
To finally make up my mind?

In this ethereal place I wish to reside,
To spread out my time,
Like honey on burnt toast
Hold onto some forsaken figment of the clock,
See with my heart and not with my mind,
Listen with my beating heart,
Listen to all the love all about me,
Wrapping her safe arms around me.