An ordinary girl.
Rushes down the hallway.
Invisible, scared, and alone.

Her eyes are cast down.
As she shrinks into the background.
Afraid to be noticed.
Hoping that she can just get through the day.

She has created a barrier around herself to mask the pain.
Poisoned whispers follow her trail.
She puts on a brave face,
And wishes to disappear.

Her beauty is screaming from within.
"You are worthy."
But she continues to relish in her flaws.
As a stain on the world.

She attempts to reach out,
But is rejected and despised.
She contains the pain once again.
Hiding it beneath her solitude.

The days continue.
There are no more tears.
A beautiful darkness spreads within.
She no longer cares.

Today is the day.
A sense of elation begins.
She has made peace with her demons,
And has embraced her shame.

She is ready.
The metal is cold on her skin.
The blade makes its mark.
It slides across her soul.

She sighs and she laughs,
At the bright red pool forming on the floor.
She sees the rain shine through the dark.
And life's hopeless journey to the unknown begins.

Another ordinary girl is lost...

Dare to be a star. The moon is too dependent on the sun and the sun is too generous to the moon but a star stands alone in the cold dark sky and lights up its own self and for it's self.

Scrolling through old pictures,
I come across the photos
That show a timeline of my descent into madness

As mental illness ravaged every single part of me
Stole my personality
My laugh
My smile
The very essence of my being.

Most will say
"It was just a phase"
But that torment
That mental and physical pain
Wanting to disappear
The horror of looking into the mirror and not recognizing yourself
Not knowing what was going on
And not being sure you could stop it.

When your worst enemy lies within you,
How can you attack it, without hurting yourself?
Perhaps that is why mental illness is so tough to overcome.
You can't just snap out of it.

I shed tears for how sick I was
How inconsolable
How dark days turned into darker nights
Where nothing mattered
Nothing had purpose
I was less valuable than the air I breathed.

But I'm grateful for those that stuck by me
That believed in me
That picked me up when I fell down
For I didn't disappear into the abyss

I was propped back up on my own two feet
Prepared for battle
Prepared to change
Prepared to do whatever it took to survive.

Fought through university
Fought to make new friends
To NOT be defined by my invisible illness

I soldiered on.
Now I'm up against the hardest part of the battle.
Accepting myself for who I am.

And I will continue to fight.
For surrendering is abandoning the very essence of my being
My soul will not bear a white flag.