Because I'm not wearing green on Saint Patrick's Day, a man gave me a pinch and I gave him a punch.
I hit that ***** so hard in the stomach that he lost his lunch.
About an hour ago, another man pinched me and I kicked him in the crotch.
He fell down and started crying like a two year old, he deserved what he got.
Nobody else had better pinch me for not wearing green.
I'll kick your **** if you pinch me because I'm very mean.

Baal was a phony god that was worshipped by many, including King Ahab and Jezebel.
Jehovah put it upon Elijah to prove to the people that he was the true God of Israel.
Satan created Baal to turn people away from Jehovah God.
It took Elijah to prove to the people that Baal was a fraud.
Elijah knew that he could show the people the truth and make Baal falter.
He told them to slaughter a bull and use it for a sacrifice on an altar.
Elijah told them that Baal would be the true God if he could burn the bull but no fire came.
But then Jehovah God sent down fire and burned the sacrifice and that put Baal to shame.
Even though Elijah had the wood and bull covered with water, both still burned.
The people saw that Jehovah is the true God, that was the lesson that they learned.
King Ahab and Queen Jezebel promoted Baal worship and it was something they came to regret.
Both of them ended up dead and God was pleased with Elijah who was the boldest of his prophets.

The Apostle Paul was a saint but he was a sinner in the beginning.
He killed Jesus's followers and Jesus struck him blind for sinning.
After Jesus sent Ananias to restore Paul's sight, Paul changed his evil ways.
He vowed to be Jesus's Apostle and preach the gospel for the rest of his days.
Paul began preaching that Jesus is our savior.
Some people became infuriated by his behavior.
They planned to have Paul put to death.
He was warned about this and he left.
After leaving, he continued to preach the gospel and made tents for a living.
Even though Paul was a former murderer, Jesus knew that he was worth forgiving.
Paul was worthy of forgiveness and so are today's sinners.
If people put an end to their sinful ways, they can be winners.

I was devastated when I learned that you wouldn't make it.
When it came  to my heart, your demise sure did break it.
You died 1096 days ago in 2013.
It was the worst year that I've seen.
When I saw you on life support, it was rough but facing your death was rougher.
My brother and I had you taken off the respirator so you wouldn't continue to suffer.
When you were dying, I felt helpless because there was nothing I could do.
When I found you dead on March the 6th, I had to say goodbye to you.
It took me about two years to get to feeling better about your death.
For two years I suffered tremendously after you became ill and left.
You were such a great mother that you made my brother and I better men.
Your death isn't permanent, when Jesus returns, we will see each other again.
I felt overbearing pain which made my life a mess.
Rest In Peace Mom, you were truly the greatest.

You weren't a saint but you were extremely close.
Out of all of the people on Earth, I've always loved you the most.
It will be very painful as they lower you into the ground.
Life will never be the same because you're no longer around.

You were a wonderful Human Being and a terrific mother too.
Your family and friends will always love you.
You were so sweet and kind that you should've been given a humanitarian award.
The people in Heaven are happy because you're there and so is The Lord.

You're in a better place and that makes your friends and family glad.
But as people see the tears rolling down my cheeks, they know that I'm so sad.
You were one fantastic lady, you were truly one of a kind.
Knowing that Heaven is your new home gives us peace of mind.

From time to time I wasn't the ideal son and that's something I regret.
You gave me life, love and happiness and that's something I'll never forget.
It hurts very much because you are deceased.
Everybody loves you Mom, may you Rest In Peace.

Families who pray together stay together, that is true.
Families should pray together because it's the right thing to do.
Families who pray together will please God and they will be blessed.
Families need to pray together because many marriages are a mess.

Even though false idols like Baal no longer exist, many people still idolize things today.
These people idolize money and *** when they should only idolize Jehovah God always.
God is offended when people idolize things other than him, it's something that he hates.
If you're such a person, you'd better change because it's something God won't tolerate.
God is the only one who should be idolized, not other wicked things.
People who idolize anything other than God had better watch out because disaster is what it will bring.