I cant help to notice
how his head quickly turns
whenever she passes by,
how his eyes seems to devour
every part of her body.
or is it my imagination?

I can feel my heart racing
anger and pain engulfs my heart
wondering if am good enough
worried if am being paranoid.

my hand he tightly holds
walking closely by my side
but is his mind with me too?

am I hoping for the impossible?
I want him to look at me
like am the only one for him
like am the one his heart and body
yearns for
I want to be more than enough.

He wasn't there when his daughter needed him,
But she never stopped trying to be in his life.
She never stopped being his daughter.
She hopes he knows that.

i feel it
a cold tightening grip in my heart
i can barely breathe
my cheeks are burning
my lips shaking not to utter a word
i hear only an echo of my clenched teeth.
i want to hit a wall
or break a glass
probably hit my spinning head hard
such an urge to crash something!
am powerless
against this emotion
for i never see it coming
Oh anger!how do i shove you away?
your weight is killing my shoulders
pushing me on my knees
pinning my spirit down the drain
my strength is diminishing
what then shall i become
if this wretched emotions
overpowers me?

Make me dance
To the hum of your words,
Pull me closer
To hear the tune that your heart sings,
Strum my hair gently
Like the strings of a guitar,
In the artist's hands.

Hold my hand,
Let's jump and swing
To the world's madness
Make me dance
Till I gasp for breath.

Make me dance,
Day and night,
the dance to carry me to sleep
And beckon the angels
To join my dance
Till dawn meets us.

Make me dance,
Till my heart is full
Till I want no more.

Come,make me dance
To the love we have built
Be my dance,
my song,my music...
Be my tune and rhythm
till the end of time

And I too,
Shall make you dance

She selfishly took from me what I wanted most.
Broke my spirit, Every bit of it.
As I watched it all fly away,
I wondered if I could stand again
If my spirit could be rekindled.

But today, I looked back and am glad she did...
Am grateful she took it all
And savoured it all
Without a second thought.
It could have been my downfall
To a bitter pit
Not sure how deep and dark the pit would have been,
But am sure she saved me
From a lifetime mistake.

Because now I can fly..
Far beyond my imaginations.
Now I see clearly
That such a dream couldn't have been enough for me.

I want more
I deserve more
And I won't stop flying
Till I find a nest
Bigger,better and for eternity.

Am finally free
To love and live again
To reach for my dreams.


November 20,2014

Watching someone I care about walk away is always the hardest for me..
Am always tempted to run and drag them back.
Am always afraid I might breakdown like a small kid watching her mama leave..
Afraid that their memories will haunt me at night,
Afraid that their scent will linger,
Afraid of my fragile heart.

But as their footsteps begin to fade away,
I begin to reflect, I look at my mirror and see the most unique woman I know..
And I tell myself that if being myself couldn't stop the person I love from leaving,
Then he or she wasn't meant to be in my life
They were just a sentence in my story.. Or maybe a small dot in between.

And I brave myself
To face the sunlight again
To smile, to live again.
It may take time and effort
It maybe shaky but...
Surprisingly, I always do!

December 27,2014
PkimsDiary@2014.

She walks down the street

Her head up high

Her smile dazzles all

Crowning her unwavering beauty

Her shiny, expensive jewels

Arouses stares and whispers.



But they don’t know that

Behind her closed door,

When she pulls down the window curtain

When her make-up has been washed off

And her precious ornaments

Has been carefully tucked away

She faces her own shadow!



This is what you don’t know

She is the one

Who lies awake every night

Not sure if HE is coming home

Hoping he is only running late

That’s her share of love.



She picks her phone

But dials not

She knows where he might be

Curled up in another’s arms

Where he rightfully belongs.



Only this woman can tell

How hard it is, to want a man

Who belongs to another

To have his affection, but not his name

To be showered with jewels and gifts

To compensate for his absence.

She is the other woman.



And who said its easy

To be in her shoes?

You may choose to judge her path

Or blame the twisted society

But I,

Chose to put it down in words

For you to read.



(November 24, 2012 at 11:19am)