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Mysteries surround me everywhere,
those incomprehensible puzzles;
Which take me to the oddest places,
in my mind, I'm quite befuddled !

Throughout my youth I was lonely,
hiding away in the attic with books;
And music that would assuage misery,
every evening I crawled through nooks.

I recall how mesmerized I could be,
by the power of the written word;
I sought to write about my torment,
but was afraid I wouldn't be heard.

With the wafting of each musical strain,
it was easy to imagine and pretend;
I'd hum along with pristine tunes,
sending my heart into such a spin !

I'm still that shy person who wanders about,
with visions swirling through my head;
Yet somehow despite my complex existence,
within me, there's no fear nor dread.

Befuddled as I may always be,
the language of love and life will endure;
I'll see a sign posted on the road one day,
beckoning me toward an open door !
 Aug 2021 Jennifer DeLong
Sophie
They asked me
''How did you get over him?''
''How did you get over him so quickly?"
I smiled and I laughed
A crazy laugh
I cried and I laughed
A silent cry
A crazy laugh
I told them
"I tricked my heart into believing that I didn't  need him."
The brain knows the truth, the heart is a sucker for love songs.
I'm watching my every single step
I'm careful not to stumble and fall
One stone on the road
could lead to a landslide
And one broken bone
could ruin it all
I'm watching my every single move
I'm careful not to scare you away
The faintest blow
could lead to a hurricane
And one wrong word
could be the last thing I say.
You love abusing me
You love telling me what to do
Your servant
You love when I do the dishes
"Because I know how to do them right"
Because you hit me when I did them "wrong"
and you hit me when the other kids wouldn't wash them at all

You love it when someone takes care of you
You conditioned me to be the perfect caregiver
For you
You love codependence
You love yourself

You don't realize that you don't love me
You grieve for me
You grieve, because it's not easy
To live without
A fulltime caregiver
A fulltime maid
A fulltime cook

It took me a long time to learn what love is
I love my Husband
I love his smile, his brilliant eyes, and that he hugs me
when I'm feeling down
I love listening to him get excited
about weird and pointless things
I love seeing him happy, with or without me
I love that we are on the same team
Team "Us", both of us

You can tell me "I Love You" everyday
for the rest of  your life
but you are only lying to yourself
written in these walls
are the stories that i cant replace
hidden i these walls
that i wish in could remake
I promise every morning
I will smile like this again
But I've been so broken
I don't even know where to begin
Cause the pain they've caused
Is sewn into my heart
The Chair
One day, maybe
I shall abandon my chair
My throne of thrones
My hidden lair

But alas, tis a single chair
Not a couch, or soft settee
I cannot thrive whilst i'm alone
Only coming alive, in company

My chair has been my single comfort
For over six years
My only companion
Are my silent tears

My remaining, and constant desire
Is my heart to share
But destined to remain
Alone in my chair

by Jemia
 Jul 2021 Jennifer DeLong
MM
Thank you for letting me know that I could still fall,

that I could still smile at the simplest things— like good morning and good night texts

or stupid selfies and corny jokes

And while it didn't work out between with us,

now I know my heart could still fall and flutter and love

And maybe one day, it will again
 Jun 2021 Jennifer DeLong
Yasin
Sometimes
poems
make
me
want
to
write
in
a
crowd
of
only
one
person.
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