I remember

when I first
learned to smell

she walked by
my office

and

smiled in a
friendly way

leaving her trace

a lingering

like fragrant smoke
or a snake

that entered
me olfactorily

I learned later
why she remained

so long

she smelled
of eternity

it never stops

now that people
are paid so much

to do it

I want to turn
it off

but I don’t

it feeds my mind
it diseases my mind

it doesn’t make
me think

it doesn’t give me
space to think

it stops me from
thinking

it makes me drink

no one knows
the future

but we all talk
like we do

I cannot compose brilliant poems, sonnets, or verses,

and I cannot speak to you in Latin or Greek;

I cannot move you with any language made up by man.

Love is the only only language I could touch you with

If you only knew how much I could love you.

If you knew I love you;

If I were brave enough to tell you at all.

i dont know what to do.
i love him.
he has taught me so much about love.
about what i need in a partner.
about how i want to be treated.
he has taught me that i can trust.
he has taught me i can be soft.
he has held me in times where i was broken.
he has pieced me back together.
fragment by fragment.
he has supported me emotionally.
he has always made sure to communicate with me.

why am i feeling different now?
why does he keep saying he will try harder?
when he has not seen me in 3 weeks?
when we spent everyday together prior?
when he decides to be lazy?

i dont know what to do
i am crying
i am exhausted
i dont know what to do

we grow up
watching movies
of the princess
marrying the
brave sweet prince
and
they live
happily every after

but

what if that
is not all
what if the princess
wants more
what if the princess
does not feel the same
way years later

they teach us
when we find
the one we love
to marry them
and live happily ever after

but

what they
do not teach
is
when
is it time to
walk away
and
leave this
chapter

                  behind

I could do it.

I have no concern for myself anymore
The only thing that keeps my heart beating
Is knowing that if it stopped
It would break yours