I want to be gone.
Erased from lives and history.
No pain,
No regrets.
No stinging hearts,
No pointed fingers.
No variables.
No guilt.
I added up to nothing.
0.00 recurring.
Each phantom day,
Each worthless minute.
Please let it end.
Without
Consequence.
Without
Meaning.
Without
Me.

It's quiet and cold inside.
Silent hostility,
Leaving me numb.
The misery breaks,
Washing away all trace of humanity.
This flood won't cleanse but eradicate.
All comfort and empathy denied.
Your words are empty missiles,
Leaving no trace of impact.
Cradle and embrace me,
But I can't feel you.

This is the ebb and flow of annihilation,
This is the will draining,
This is the light fading.

As I lose myself,
You never knew me.

This pain,
This addiction.
A love letter —
Carved in skin.
A ****** red itch.
Undenied.
My scars are medals,
Tragic measurements.
Sickening,
Precise in their torment.
Self-loathing.
Self-inflicted.
Self-destruct.

On every leaf,
Of every tree
And beautiful in memory.
A girl in black
Shared her love with me —
Secrets dark and true.
In each word,
I see remain
Nothing greater than her name.
Written, sweetly still.
In empty voices,
All around
Her gentle voice can still be found.
Reaching, softly still.
On every wave,
Of every sea
And beautiful in memory.
A girl in black
Shared her love with me —
Secrets dark and true.

The edge, static.
Dangling our feet —
Toward oblivion.
You smiled at me.
Hand
in
Hand.
We were happy,
For the last time.

Not cherished
But chastised.
Not so much loved
As loveless.
Not so much living
As wearing out.
Not a life
A life sentence.
No longer human
Just human remains.

We never made it to the sea,
You and I.
I loved so deep that it left a scar.
The wreckage of my flesh,
Weeps crimson tears.
My sweet purgatory.
My damnation.
Cutting deeper —
Without price.
Without pain.
We never made it to the sea,
But I am drowning.

You spare me a minute.
Some words,
Casual sentiment with hooks.
***'s marking my demise —
Buried in self-pity and hope.
Who believes those sappy love flicks?
Heartthrob, tragedy and love saves the day!
Beginning, middle, end.
Counterfeit.

Never.
Seen.
It.
Happen.

Love bleeds,
Dying on the vine.
In truth, there are no happy endings.
Just endings.

My darling —
You helped me to understand,
You helped me to breathe.
In you I knew love.
You were the sun!
Now I lie here
Dismantling the certain future,
Counting words.
Now I'm a ghost ship
No sextant, compass or map.
My darling —
Will you forgive me?
Will you weep for me?
"I'll always care for you."
An empty platitude,
A parting shot.
Always and forever.
In the arms of your new lover.
Silent.
Silent.
And you don't think of me.

This quiet girl,
A force of nature.
She is keeper of keys,
Joy and season.
Thread in the fabric of bliss.
Essential.
Queen
Divine in council.
A honeydripper —
Vitriolic in wrath.

I'm possessed,
Gratefully tortured by her memory.
Lingering
Yet, forever gone.

Time erodes all memory,
Love ain't how it's meant to be.
It only leaves you burnt and scarred,
Your heart twisted, narrow—hard.
All the truth you knew untied,
Hopeful passion left denied.
I thought your love eternal bright,
But now I face the dying light.

For a moment,
I forgot.
The world no longer knows her name.
A second after waking —
She's still warm in my arms.
A glorious tomb
Transformed into a sick joke.
"*******."
Words spat in the face of God,
Nobody.
No undeniable devise, reason or rebuke.
It's over,
Quit yer struggling.
Embrace this tireless oblivion.

After her,
I found there was nothing left.
Those songs —
Now skewed in absence,
Stubbed out on my skin.
She is a faded dream,
Unpicked and sullied.
Nostalgia
Sharpening the blade,
Dragging bodies.
Beauty in a red dress
Flawless in her glory.

She is gone.
Pack importance neatly away,
Strike dumb the dialogue,
Blur the details,
Lay dreams in the dark.
Dismantle the stage,
Make each player retire,
Tear up scripts,
Hush all ad libs and quips.
Lose joy in white noise,
Forget breath,
**** desire —
Let all souls expire.
No beauty awaits,
Beyond pearly gates.
Kick out the chair,
Let me swing in dead air.

Waiting.
This sweet ****** cycle,
Into dust—
Into dust!
Endless.

Will the happy moments go,
Will the secrets start to show,
Will all words turn to lies,
Will there be x's in my eyes?

Obliterate the rest of me,
While darkness dies inside.
Lead my rusted bones astray,
Restore my wounded pride.
Annihilate the sting of hope,
Erase its sorry stain.
Kiss away each vapid tear,
Take away the pain.
Desecrate my leaden heart,
Cull the weary past.
For dreams of love are fragile,
And are not meant to last.

A tear-stained letter,
Black light, white noise.
Knife in hand,
Final kisses trace my throat —
Left to right.
Each ****** convulsion
A jubilant jig.
No tears or regret,
Nought to lose
Just love, hope and innocence.
Pills and shrunken heads
Left far behind.
Forever.
Your words no longer save me —
The rot in my head,
My blackened voice entirety.

I love you and I'm sorry.

Silence — our silence,
Unspooling,
Gone now, and ****** with the wolves.
Dethroned,
Without importance.