I think of you at dinner
at the movies, at the mall
I think of you in giant crowds
when I start to feel real small
I think of you at breakfast
at parties, parks, and pools
I think of you in math class
actually whenever I'm at school
I think of you through meetings
through papers, pens, and plans
I think of you whenever
somebody grabs my hand
I think of you at street lights
with every red I hit
I think of you through conversation
every word, a detail that I miss
I think of you at midnight
I think of you alone
I think of you all summer
I think of you as home
I think of you forever
through winter, spring and fall
I think of you constant
Do you think of me at all

I think of you when I am alone.

When I am cold, and the warmth of a duvet does not quite match the heat of your body.

When it is 2 in the morning, and my thoughts jumble up and form a caricature of you.

When I am asleep - my few hours of refuge from the constant letdown of sober consciousness, bombarded with images of you, dredged up from memories I would rather forget.


I wish that was it.
But I see you everywhere else.

Reaching.
Reaching out my hand
Feeling the cool worn fabric
Of the bed sheets accross from me,
Where I would steal every star in space just to have your body laying there
So that instead of finding
The crushing emptiness that already
Hangs in my ribcage,
Tightening it's chilling grip as gently as such a malevolent force can,
Instead of my finger tips encountering this as I stretch my arm out in the middle of another night I can't stop dreaming of your eyes the last time I ever saw them, I could maybe touch a trace of your existence again. I could feel the crippling weight in my chest be lifted as my grasping fingers grab hold of some piece of you. Any piece of you; your painstakingly bright smile, the light in your heart breakingly blue eyes that I still swear could power the New York skyline as long as you wanted it to, maybe the slow steady beat of your heart that I can still sometimes hear in our favorite song.
Then maybe I could breathe again.

I drink in the sweet light
Of the honey coloured moon
as it floats high at midnight
hoping it doesn't leave soon

As I stare at the full moon
The world falls away
and I lose my peripheral vision
bathing in the moon's rays

Sliver beams of light
That reflects off the ocean
And seem to be too bright
to be moonshine

I began to see now
understand how
myths and legends
of the moon began

Egyptian, Aztec, Celtic and Greek
Khonsu, Metzli, Elatha and Artemis
And even poor Starveling
with his dog and thorn bush

All trying to capture the raw beauty
that is the moon and it's light
The rarest jewel of them all
Shining bright through out the night

But all attempts of personification
contain to much complication
to represent
to simplicity of the moon

So I'll stop trying to convey
what I can see
because no matter what I say
will not match what floats above the sea

The mysteries of those eyes still beckon me.
Wandering away, I seek a glance.
Wondering, would there be a second chance.
Wishing, to be touched again.
In those eyes I saw,
the answers to all my pains.
A world bereft of love,
I can't be sane.
Unless! I see you again
to look in your eyes and be born again.

I miss you
God, how I miss you
I've never missed anyone the way that
I miss you
Right now
Why can't you be here?
And I don't want to miss you
I know
There's no hope in yesterday
But only in tomorrow
Hope that you'll return
How naive of me to think you'll return
I know
It's just
I miss you
Its hard
Being without you, living without you
Anything without you
Is pain
Because part of me knows
You don't miss me
You're not writing poems describing just how bad
You miss me
But yet I still can't stop
Missing you
I guess after all that we've been through
I'm allowed to miss you
Sorry to be a bother
I just
Miss you