How do you make emotions stop?
   Take love to the edge, then let it drop?
How can you just let it all go,
   When holding tight is all that you know?
Never just turned and walked away
   With a heart that’s crying out to stay.

Letting go just takes all your might,
   When doing what’s best doesn’t feel right.
Knowing there is no one to blame,
   Knowing who it was that fanned the flame.
Knowing who chose to cross that line,
   Hanging too tight to what wasn’t mine.

Wrapped up so tightly in this web,
   Yet wanting to tear away instead.
Walk away and just let it go,
   It sounds so easy, and yet I know,
Its so hard to just let it lay.
   Wish it wouldn’t have to be this way.

I over think everything,
the thought that we could be,
or that maybe you would see.
  
   I never really understood,
How you ever could just break a heart,
Just tear ones' apart.

Maybe it was me, I was blind,
When you wanted me too see.
Maybe it was me, I tore my own heart apart,
and blamed you for the part.

I'm sorry for my actions, my regrets are strong.
But one thing I know, is that I was the one who was wrong.

I am burning inside.
My anger is a tiger,
A tiger burning in the forest
Of the night... dark as
Aged blood on a
Midnight shroud.

I must accept the truth of
My life. And find complete
Forgiveness for those who
Have done their level best
To destroy it.

The ones who have taken
The blood from my veins
And ripped out my heart.
Who killed my dreams
Now, once again, stillborn
In my arms.

I won't allow self pity to
Replace that sweet child.
A poison changeling
To suckle my bossom
And bite the ******.

I'm angry.
But it could be worse.

I could have a
Body wracked with cancer.

I could have been born
In a body stunted and
Wizened... with a
Conciousness to
Understand my
Predicament...
A quadrepalegic.

I could have been born
In a sewer in Calcutta.

From dawn of day
Til day's begun
Count your blessings

One

By

One.

One day
forgiveness
Will come.

Lucifer, Lucifer
Black, rotting mind,
How can you live
With the lies that you wind?

Lucifer, Lucifer
You claim to destroy
But need God's permission
For what you deploy.

Black Lily of old,
Wrecker of worlds,
Mover of mountains,
Oil slick pearl,

The whorls on your forehead,
The horns on your head,
The eyes in your hands
As you dress your dead.

You desolate valleys
You eat up the land,
You grind a man's bones
To Sahara sand.

In my eye a beam
In your eye a mote,
The rampant *****
Of a rutting goat.

They grow in your belly
The flies that you spawn,
Maggots in multitudes
10 trillion strong.

Yes, out they spew
Through your spittle and teeth,
The lies propigated
From way underneith.

O, putrid rose,
Who has duplicate skill
To create "beauty"
To dazzle man's will.

But nothing you "make"
Is good on this earth,
No, nothing you "make"
Has any WORTH.

O, blighted star,
Constellation of hate,
Galaxy ghoul
Your strength is FINITE.

Who runs the show,
You aborted SOW?
When all's said and done
To whom will you BOW?

More sooner than late
Your end will come
In the pit ALONE.
With no one to ***.

Who'll put you there,
Bound in your chains?
Why! GOD! Of course...

... for Jesus Christ REIGNS.


Soul Survivor
Catherine Jarvis
(C) February 2014

In perspective of everything, I am nothing.

A* minor blip in time and space.
Microscopic compared to the entire universe.

Maybe I am small, but I'm
Enjoying it anyways.


m.k.j