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 Jan 2018 Jay
Alex
Scars
 Jan 2018 Jay
Alex
scars tell stories

how the ones on my right knee
say that i was a fun loving kid who skipped down a gravel hill
how my brother carried me back to my parents
how i felt proud about my scar and could tell all the kids on the playground how i got it

how the one on my right shin
shows that i love tromping through blackberry bushes
at camp with friends trying to find the biggest ones
it makes me relive the memory of being there with them

how the one on my left arm
shows that i was a stupid kid
and that i turned up the speed on that treadmill too much
and fell and got stuck with it burning my back and cutting into my arm

how the ones on my left wrist
show that i am fighting a war with myself
everyday
that i am trying to feel something besides nothing
that i want to be in control

scars tell stories
each one is a chapter in my life
that i am going to remember forever
some dark
some light
but they’re mine
 Jan 2018 Jay
Jeanie
Dead cat bounce
 Jan 2018 Jay
Jeanie
Every 28 days  I am......
Lovely
Kind
****
Caring
Beautiful
Fabulous
Wonder Woman
Hopeful
Peaceful
Quiet
Reflective
Steady
Hesitant
Unsure
Withdrawn
Irritable
Righteous
Entitled
Reproachful
Blamin­g
Despairing
Self-loathing
Sad
Critical
Panicked
Angry
Paranoid
R­emorseful......
Oh look - I'm lovely again!
 Jan 2018 Jay
Lauren Johnson
you know that feeling
when something happens
that you knew probably happened but just didn’t want to believe it was true
but now you know it’s true
and so your heart just kinda sinks to your feet and you aren’t quite sure how to pick it back up
and you don’t even feel like crying because all your anguish just dissipated into the air  
and now you feel empty
so you just sit there on the floor
staring at nothing
all the life and color absent from your eyes

yeah

i know that feeling too
I don’t even know what to tag this
 Dec 2017 Jay
Desi
Home
 Dec 2017 Jay
Desi
My grandmother used to tell me to think of love as a home.
So I did.
home felt comfortable.
Home seemed a little broken from the past owners. I thought of it as a fixer upper.
Home was beautiful.
Home made me happy, except when he did that thing I didn’t like, a thousand times.
Looking back that thing, was just silly.
I think that thing was just my excuse for not loving all the other things home put me through.
I tried to brush it off because no matter what this would be the first home I knew.
For the longest time I tried to fix home.
However, when I fixed one thing; another seemed broken.
The tile floors started to crack, the very thing I loved the most.
Then the beautiful walls started to crumble right in front of me.
My first home started getting harder and harder to fix, and just like that it became harder and harder to love.
Looking back, home was just a house.
 Dec 2017 Jay
Buckley Grace
You ***** me.
And all your friends thought it was a joke.
You ***** me.
And I blamed myself for weeks.
You ***** me.
And I still do.
You ***** me.
And my parents called your parents to talk about it.
You ***** me.
And I’ve never felt so embarrassed in all my life.
You ***** me.
And a year later I saw you at Waffle House.
You ***** me.
And all I want to do is drink.
You ***** me.
And it did not leave physical bruises.
You ***** me.
And it left bruises on my soul.
You ***** me.
And I am still not broken.
You ***** me.
But you have not won.
familiar tune
my children's laughter follows
the mountain stream

Written by
Marion Clarke
down the river
scattering among stars
my mom's ashes

Written by
Cristina Apetrei
noon heat
even a fish in the brook
staying in a shadow

Written by
Tomislav Maretic
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