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715 · Jan 2015
said shakespeare
Lottie Jan 2015
If the whole worlds a stage, shouldn't you have to pay to watch my show?
As the tempest whirls around us, don't we all wish for a prince to rock up and save us?
Or is Caliban searching and hoping we'll succumb
To the horrors that fall like stars.
In a midsummer nights dream, the boys are all beauties,
All blue eyes and magic and promise.
While he plays an ***, is he mirroring us?
As we double, double, toil and trouble,
The fire burning and bubbling in the inferno we call a heart.
We call out in the dark for our Romeos
Wanting to leave our names behind us
So watch as I unfurl
Like a lily on a pond
Eight petals,
Eight walls,
My globe,
My stage.
For mammy
704 · Aug 2015
Hope.
Lottie Aug 2015
I think, maybe
The world gets easier.
Someday.
700 · Apr 2016
Kill Yourself.
Lottie Apr 2016
Oh,* the mind goes.
Does she mean me?
I assure you, that I don't.
I mean the little voice inside
Your head that said this
Applied to you.
You are brilliant;
**** that little voice,
The not-you
That says you're anything less
Than radiant.
694 · May 2017
I yearn for winter.
Lottie May 2017
When the world is so cold,
And the air is muffled by the sound of nothing growing,
Let me feel your breath on the crown of my head,
And the smile on my lips,
And the small circles you depict in the small of my back
That so quietly whisper "I love you."
692 · Aug 2015
Topic: dead flowers.
Lottie Aug 2015
No matter how bright,
Now matter how fragrent,
Everything fades
And smells like rot.
The smell of old books,
The colour of old life.
689 · Aug 2015
demons
Lottie Aug 2015
Guilt is a tangible thing,
But not a manageable creature.
Locked in my ribs, an animal prowls,
Sharpening it's claws on the bones.
My hands shake with the reverberations
So I clamp them around my ribs,
Another barrier- another thing with claw marks in.
662 · Jun 2017
Patience.
Lottie Jun 2017
Make my back arch and my mind wander;
657 · Apr 2015
wind
Lottie Apr 2015
I can hear the walls move.
Edging in.
The wind calling,
The wind pushing,
At the box I'm in.
This storm will dislodge
My perfect world.
I know it will happen.
*I can hear the walls move.
Essentially, the wind was so loud that I had nightmares (again) and woke up with "I can hear the walls move" stuck in my brain. This is probably crap I'm sorry
648 · Mar 2016
Hypnosis.
Lottie Mar 2016
Rocking* from side to side,
Hovering over me,
Looking at my lips
And ghosting over my neck.
Begging and humming and
whimpering for permission
To kiss, and only kiss.
Christopher.
640 · Jan 2016
F is for Fire.
Lottie Jan 2016
The never ending inferno of chaos
And heat.
That we need to survive and thrive.
There are fires within us, combustion
And flames
To fill the hollow, to bring us warmth.
636 · May 2015
static
Lottie May 2015
There's static on my brain,
Except I can't ground it
I can't make it leave
By wiping it away with my hand

When I touch it, it shocks my hand
And makes me shake
And fogs my mind
And I can't stomp it out

Panic is a fog of static
Its there, you know its there
But you can't. can't
Do anything about it.
622 · Jan 2016
D is for darkness.
Lottie Jan 2016
It finds us all in the end, doesn't it?
619 · Nov 2016
A Question.
Lottie Nov 2016
When do you believe life begins?
Feel free to answer in the comments or message me privately :3
604 · Oct 2015
Bubble.
Lottie Oct 2015
Be in my bubble,
Let's listen to lousy music
And kiss
sweet sun- milky chance
596 · Jan 2015
ir/rationally
Lottie Jan 2015
Rationally, I know everything's fine
Rationally, I know it won't happen again
Rationally, the memories should make it easier for me to handle now,
Rationally, I should feel better.

Irrationally, I find myself screaming
Irrationally, I find myself crying
Irrationally, I feel worse now than I did when the world was falling in,
Irrationally*, I feel alone.
This helped Chris understand a little bit
593 · Dec 2015
Puns.
Lottie Dec 2015
At the root of my happiness,
Branching out from my soul
Is the thought that the people I love
Will never leaf me
And it stumps me
Because they are so beautiful
And so full of life
And they love *me.
589 · May 2016
.
Lottie May 2016
.
The travesty is, beautiful boy,
That the silhouette you cast when
You're above me
Shines brighter than the
Stars behind you.
583 · Aug 2015
Power.
Lottie Aug 2015
There's a power to words,
But I don't want them anymore.
580 · Jul 2015
Hey there delilah
Lottie Jul 2015
I let it play for the first time in months,
My mind shut down and heart
Squeezed with sadness.
Because we promised each other
So much
And this was your favourite song.
577 · Mar 2015
I am selfish.
Lottie Mar 2015
i dont pretend to not be self obsessed,
i crave attention and am selfish.
but being selfish isn't a bad thing,
provided thought its thrown for others.
i don't mean to make you feel like
i hate the idea of selfishness,
i believe that in quite a few cases
its better than living for others.
but i never meant to make you feel
that i thought i was a level above
everything that you are
for  i believe that I'm at least
two levels bellow you
because i am selfish
and I'm sorry for it.
Lottie Aug 2015
At the mad Hatter's tea party,
I sit far away from the rabble
Of tea *** mice and twitchy hares.
Little me, little Alice, falling
Down the rabbit hole
And not knowing what is me
And what is not.
Dear lord, poetry isn't doing its thing today..
558 · Jan 2015
spectator
Lottie Jan 2015
Sitting in the back of a theatre,
Not knowing the production by name,
Knowing what minute the curtain will rise.
While the end of the show is untold.
My little metaphor for life and death, I like to see it as hopeful:3
557 · May 2015
scratch
Lottie May 2015
Scars don't hurt,
They itch.

An itch is just a niggling,
Annoying little nail
Dragging down the back of your mind,
Piercing for while you think of it,
There until you forget.

If they hurt, you'd never
Forget that they were there,
Dragging nails through your heart,
Piercing through your skin
For you to always remember.

Itch the scratch of hurt,
Drag nails through your mind and heart
So your scars are never forgotten
But they don't break through your skin.
552 · Jan 2016
Christopher.
Lottie Jan 2016
Broken and beautiful,
Like a crystal rose- shattered
Only to be glued back together
With some of the pieces missing
Or in the wrong order.

I wouldn't have you any other way.
Lottie Mar 2015
I've yet to find a religion
That doesn't shun the others,
Just because their god has a different name.

I've yet to find a religion
That doesn't say everyone's entitled
To their own view as long as its the same as theirs.

I've yet to find a religion
That doesn't condemn women
To being inferior just because god's a dude (apparently.)

I've yet to find a religion
That doesn't insist its followers
Do unto others as theyd have done unto them.


I've yet to find a religion
That doesn't disregard that rule
When it suits them to ignore "gods" words.
you might have noticed by now, religion isn't my favourite thing
547 · Apr 2015
mine/yours
Lottie Apr 2015
I would quite like to hold you.

*I would quite like to be held.
538 · Feb 2016
Y is for You.
Lottie Feb 2016
When I am falling down,
You will pick me up,
As we rise again, we miss the floor,
We rise above it all.
You came for me,
Healed my heart with kind words
And taught me how to fly.
I love you.
Christopher.
536 · May 2016
Movie nights.
Lottie May 2016
I hate movies,
Anyone who cares knows that.
Sitting in a room with all the people you love
And ignoring them.
But with you,
In this moment,
I want to build a fort with pillows and fairy lights.
I want to watch movies which came from comics,
And see you laugh, and cry, and hurt for people
Who done exist.
I want to feel you nose my neck in the quiet scenes,
And kiss me in the credits.
533 · Jun 2017
.
Lottie Jun 2017
.
Loving me is inefficient.
Listening to me is inefficient.
Is there anything about me that's worth your time?
532 · Mar 2015
tip tap, tossers
Lottie Mar 2015
Click, click, clicking away,
Finding ourselves each day?
Tip tap typing a search,
come on men, quick march!
forward into the google bar,
Let's YouTube who we are
Cause God knows what we find inside
makes us want to hide.
530 · Oct 2017
"irrational."
Lottie Oct 2017
I'm not asking you to understand why I don't want you to use this word to describe me. I'm asking you to refrain from doing so because it makes me feel like I'm getting in the car to go and find her again. Its reminding me of when I found her standing waist deep in a river crying because Michael said he wanted to die. Or when I helped her break up with her boyfriend because every time she'd tried to before, he'd grabbed a razor. Or crying in France because I needed her to take care of me for once. Or when he jumped on his computer because we borrowed it. Or when her parents shouted at each other. Or when she ran away.

I give up.
528 · Aug 2015
Topic: eyes.
Lottie Aug 2015
"A window to the soul", you say.
So you, my friend can see in.
But they are our window,
With which we see outwards
And we show our emotions.
Happy tears, sad tears, angry tears.
Or no tears, and no emotion.

You don't see me through my eyes,
I show you.
The beginning of my 'topic' poems.
522 · Oct 2015
Blindfolded heart.
Lottie Oct 2015
The things we do for love
Are upsettingly similar to
The ones we do out of hate.
521 · Oct 2015
I wish.
Lottie Oct 2015
I wish I could show love,
Rather than just feel it.

I wish I could ignore hate
Instead of being consumed.

The desire to radiate the affection
I feel for others,
Rather than stuttering and stammering
When the words won't come out right
Or they are misinterpreted
Or merely disregarded
As lies.
518 · Jul 2015
Alliterated agony.
Lottie Jul 2015
Bubbles blosoming bellow,
Wretched, wrenching roses.
Thorns outstretched,
the darkness drawing
Blood from wounds long sealed.
Who could sleep
On this bed of brambles
When the pain
Comes from
Within.
Ya know what? IDEK what this means
517 · Mar 2015
"i need hel-"
Lottie Mar 2015
Ohgod, I'm sorry
I forgot I wasn't
Supposed to talk
To you anymore.
Right.
Sorry, right.
I'll leave.
Sorry.
Just had a terrifying thought and couldn't get it out of my head, writing seems to help so..
510 · Dec 2016
Safe, sane, consensual.
Lottie Dec 2016
Safe:
In the sense that I want bruises.
Sane:
In the sense that I want insanity.
Consensual:
Obviously, but please take.
508 · Oct 2015
Symbiotic stab wounds.
Lottie Oct 2015
Cutting you makes us both bleed.
507 · Jun 2016
Airship.
Lottie Jun 2016
I had a dream once, my darling. About you and I, adrift in the sky.
For hours we'd dance and dance, your eyes glowing and growing, dancing, enhancing,
With each spin, each laugh as the hours turned to days turned to a lifetime.
We would stop our waltz only to kiss; long and lasting and promising.
A kiss that would power our airship, would end all wars, would cease my tears.
A kiss that would cure my fears.
504 · Jul 2016
V for Vendetta
Lottie Jul 2016
Beneath this mask there is more than flesh.
Beneath this mask there is an idea, Mr Creedy,
And ideas do not die.
500 · Jan 2018
Ice crystals.
Lottie Jan 2018
Nothing,
And I mean nothing,
Hurts more than the sting
Of misery that tingles
Across one's neck
Where the breath of your loved one Should be.
Long distance is not so much about miles. You could be on the wrong side of the bed, darling boy, and I would be consumed by this lonely ache.
499 · Apr 2015
pull it together, watson.
Lottie Apr 2015
I can smell the table,
Unlabled chemicals and acrid smoke
Radiate off it as though it was still on fire

I can hear the violin,
Unbearably beautiful and haunting
Echoing around at three in the morning

I can hear the voice,
Hollowed out and crackling
While you phone and tell me you're a fraud

I can see the body,
Broken up and bleeding
Because the world just seemed too hard

I can touch the gravestone,
Freshly polished and gleaming
As I ask for one more miracle, Sherlock.
Don't
Be
Dead.
498 · Apr 2015
three of five easter eggs
Lottie Apr 2015
I really regret this
Three Easter eggs in five minutes
Remind me not to compete with my sister
Over who can get diabetes the fastest...
497 · Aug 2015
Topic: piercings.
Lottie Aug 2015
I was told when I was young that beauty is pain.
Is that why we pay people to stab us?
So we can jab a piece of precious metal,
Right through our precious skin.
492 · Jul 2017
.
Lottie Jul 2017
.
I am a  catalyst of discomfort and yet I am asked to stay.

Please just hate me, it'd be easier for all of us.
487 · Aug 2015
Identity.
Lottie Aug 2015
To choose a definition for what we have,
Would be to cheapen it with a label.
The namelessness of my affection,
Of our actions, is what makes it
So beautifully and quietly
*ours.
476 · Mar 2015
I shouldn't breathe.
Lottie Mar 2015
The guilt I bare for breathing in,
Is half what I feel for breathing out.
And if this turns out to be a waste of pixels,
It'll join the wasted air up there.
..yup
473 · Sep 2015
Vance joy- mess is mine.
Lottie Sep 2015
Talking like we used to do
It was always me and you
Shaping up and shipping out
Check me in and check me out

Do you like walking in the rain?
When you think of love, do you think of pain?
You can tell me what you see
I will choose what I believe

Hold on, darling
This body is yours,
This body is yours and mine
Well hold on, my darling
This mess was yours,
Now your mess is mine

Your mess is mine

See you in the marketplace
Walking 'round at 8am
Got 2 hours before my flight
Luck be on my side tonight

You're the reason that I feel so strong
The reason that I'm hanging on
You know you gave me all the time
Or did I give enough of mine?

Hold on, darling
This body is yours,
This body is yours and mine
Well hold on, my darling
This mess was yours,
Now your mess is mine
Oh
Now your mess is mine
Oh
Your mess is mine

Bring me to your house
And tell me "sorry for the mess"
Hey, I don't mind
You're talking in your sleep
All the time
Well, you still make sense to me
Your mess is mine

Your mess is mine
This body's yours and this body's mine
Your mess is mine
468 · Mar 2015
my makey feely better poem
Lottie Mar 2015
I know you're really down right now,
And I don't know how to help,
So here's a little set of words
To show you're not alone.

We could build a pillow fort,
Or swear at passers by.
Raid the fridge, get really ill
Or write some stuff like this:3
Izzi3, I'm sorry I can't be with yu while you're not great so just read this and I hope it helps:3
464 · Apr 2016
Writer's block.
Lottie Apr 2016
I know the world is terrifying and black skies cover us all, but sometimes a small cloud of light will pass over us, carried by the breeze. The wind itself will hold the smells of tomorrow while the cloud will hold no scent, no sound. It will be but a light. In it though, we will see yesterday, dynasties past, kingdoms that rose and fell and flying cities. In this cloud you will have sat on a throne and commanded an army. You will have sat in a rocking chair and read to children while they pout, as children do. This cloud of every and no colour will call to you and pull on your soul until you forget that the sky is black and terrifying and all-consuming. For that is what a day dream is for. Now go back and make the colours invert. Make the sky golden and the clouds black. Make this world your kingdom, your dynasty. The classroom clock won't tick in the world if you make it for yourself. Make your own time and write your own world.
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