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Emily Jun 2014
I'm sorry I wasted so much time in our relationship being a *****
I hope she realizes the type of man she's got
I hope she sees what an incredibly intelligent guy you are
I hope she treats you with respect
I hope she understands the way you work
I hope she is able to read you the way I could
I hope she makes you happy
I hope she cooks your favorite foods
I hope she likes the music you do and can make you laugh
I hope she doesn't care that you enjoy the occasional ****
I hope she enjoys that with you the way I did and do
I hope she loves you as deeply and as passionately as you deserve to be loved
I hope she knows that to have you is a privilege, a high honor
I hope she's the one and makes you happy
I'm feeling terrible and sorry that it couldn't be me
I'll miss you probably forever and a day
Wishing it could've always stayed that way
Wondering now where things went wrong
Listening to Rebelution reminds me of my ex...

© Emily 2014
Emily Feb 2014
Without your pathetic and pitiful web of lies
I finally feel I can live my life
I'm free from the garbage that fills your mind
25 words.

© Willa 2014
Emily Feb 2016
when i met you
i judged you
and for that
i'm sorry
it was wrong of me
because God made you special
you bring me joy
you share jokes
you give me moments
of freedom
when we talk
i feel free
free from the pain i've felt
free from the twisted sadness
i want to be close friends
i know this is just the beginning
but i really care about you
i enjoy my time with you
and how much we have in common
i'm so thankful that i met you
you're such a sweet person
i hope you think the same about me
because right now
you're the only good thing in my life
you're the only person that makes me smile
i find myself wanting to talk to you more and more
thank you for waking up my soul
thank you for giving me something to look forward to
thank you for being my new friend
Emily Jul 2014
Throwing our friendship to the ground
Hanging out with your new friends
Forgetting that I've always been around
Their loyalty won't match mine
Their care won't live as deep as mine always has
I can't believe that after all this time
You choose to throw what we had aside
Replace our friendship for something not nearly as special
Forgetting who's been with you since the beginning
Who has grown with you
Lived with you
Loved you
It hurts me to the core
Because I know I love you more
I'm slowly becoming part of your past
I thought our friendship would always last
© Emily 2014
F U
Emily Sep 2015
F U
I hate you for destroying everything I had
I hate you for always holding me back
I hate you for the times when you'd mess with my head
I hate you for all the damage that you did
I hate how you watched as I wasted away my life
I hate how everything you ever said was a lie
I hate how even today, the affect of you still remains
I hate how for all my problems, you're the one to blame
I hate the stolen hours, days, weeks
I hate how you turned me into a freak
I will never forgive you for what you did
Not just to me but even to little kids
I hate you
Emily Mar 2014
Do you think I care what you think
Do you think I care about what you say
Talk crap about me
You don't know the thoughts in my head
You don't know what I do
Or who I talk to
You don't phase me one bit
You're a liar
You're full of ****
I don't value what you say
I don't waste my time on fakers like you
Because nothing you ever do is true
Keep running your mouth
Trying to make yourself look tough and strong
But you're only making a fool out of yourself
Because you're always wrong
Only the weak minded and cruel people at heart
Hold a grudge and act bitter
You've been this way from the start
I wonder when you'll finally just *******
© Willa 2014
Emily May 2015
I hate every part of me
I hate going through life that way
I stay awake in the middle of the night
While everyone else is asleep
I sit in a puddle of self loathing

I have no desire to speak to anyone
No desire for that at all
I'm a prison in my own home
I don't want them and they don't want me
What a terrible life to lead

Everyone is finding fault with me
They're always so disappointed
Makes me feel worthless and stupid
Why should I try any longer
I gave up a long time ago

My blood is my refuge
If anybody knows my pain is real, it is me
It is never something they can take away
It is all that I have, the scars and the darkness
Without it, I'm lonely

Don't sit there and tell me that I'm fine
That I have it made
None of that means **** when I'm holding this blade
Your pointless words and hateful glares
The most perfect triggers

Thank you for bringing me closer to my pain
And further away from you
Whatever
Emily Feb 2014
People can get angry all they want
But I had to change my life
I left for a good reason
I was sick of living a lie
You didn't want me when I was around
And now that I've left
You try to put the blame on me
All this hate is simply crazy
I wasn't the one who'd ignore you
I was always there to comfort you
Apparently just when you were bored
Because you always left
Went back to other love interests
Treating me as if I meant nothing
It's not my problem
I was just a piece in your game
You lost me fair and square
Soon I'll forget your name
Along with your face
© Willa 2014
Emily Feb 2014
The hazel of your eyes
The specks of green and brown
They're so beautiful
I could stare into them forever
But they're the most special
Because I can see your love
All the way through them
It's nothing but real
It's nothing but genuine
© Willa 2014
Emily Jun 2015
Sick of the traps
Sick of the questions
Get away from me
If you think I'm a fake
This is all I can take
Get away from me
If all you do is question me
Clearly we weren't meant to be
I am done with this mess
It doesn't even make sense
Not even a little bit
Everything is wrong
We never get along
As much as I want this to work
It just keeps getting worse
Please understand me when I say
I'll always love you
But please get away
Emily Jul 2014
The way I love her is unlike anything I've ever felt
My heart is literally melting
When she calls me
I hear her voice
And I'm at peace
My eyes meet hers
When I see her face through the screen
And it brings tears to my eyes
I miss her so much even though I'm looking at her
Nothing can stray me away from her
No one can ever compare to her
She's the most amazing, worthy, lovely person I'll ever know
I want her to be my wife
She belongs in my life
I'm so in love it hurts
A pain so sweet
© Emily 2014
Emily Aug 2014
You can't fix people
All the love in the world
Wouldn't be enough
You give so much of yourself
Only to eventually just give up
Emily Jun 2014
i won't forget the way you left me
and i won't forget the way you threw our friendship to the ground
nearly 7 years strong
it was all for nothing
i guess i wasted my time believing you and wanting you for all those years
i guess i wasted my time sticking up for you and defending you
when even your own brother warned me of your childlike personality
not to mention your mother and father
grow up
no relationship is perfect
every friendship has its ups and down
it's only the strong and the willing who stick with it no matter how much it hurts
and no matter how much it frustrates the mind
you are weak
you are stupid
you are inexperienced
clearly you know nothing about what a true relationship entails
it takes hard work, devotion, dedication
it takes two people working through the horrible times
to make it out on the other side
you have lost me forever, since you threw me away
it seems so easy for you to just toss me aside
i hope you realize what you have done
i will never forgive you
you aren't willing to fight for me or us
the way i was willing to fight and wait for the right time
the time when we could have been happy
but you ruined it
© Emily 2014
Emily Apr 2014
Having dealt with death first hand
I have witnessed the loss
I have witnessed the pain
The never ending grief of losing
A brother, a mother, a friend, a lover
You never see that person again
You never see their face
You never hear their voice
It's the one time where the word "never"
Is painfully the right answer
It is impossible to understand
How someone can be here one moment
And gone the next
Science can tell us
That the brain has died
Or the heart has stopped beating
But what can tell us
Where the mind went
Where the soul has gone
Where is our brother
Where did our mother go
Our friend disappeared
Our lover left our world
These questions press on us
For the entirety of our lives
It challenges our faith
It darkens our world
A little bit at a time
We'll never understand what happened
And that is why grief never truly ends
My best friend's cousin, who I've had the pleasure of meeting, died yesterday in such a tragic way. It's devastating to see people go through such a horrible time. He had a daughter. Rest In Peace, Joseph.

© Naomi 2014
Emily Feb 2014
I deluded myself into thinking
That you were the only one for me
But I couldn't have been more wrong
I was blind but now I see

You're nothing special
Nothing compared to what I need
I give you my all
And you take the life right out of me

It's such a shame
How the wasted feelings left me empty
I always have faith in everything
Including the things that hurt me

I suppose it's time to change my ways
To stop believing in things that are hopeless
And instead live my life with clarity and peace
I'll move on and grow from this
© Willa 2014
Emily Apr 2014
I lose the faith easily
That's just something about me
I have no confidence in myself
Therefore I have no confidence in anyone
True friends are few and far between
It's been this way since I was a teen
There is nothing or no one specifically to blame
It's just that life is one big game
I can't escape the person I am
There is just no one that could understand
The way I feel and the way I think
Not even I can find the missing link
I feel so confused, like nothing is real
That's why my true self I try to conceal
Being let down is something I'm used to
It's very difficult for me to have to go through
I always give one hundred ten percent
Only to be left living a life of torment
I hate that I care about people that mean not one thing
I'm looking for love, not just some fling
Spare me your flirtatious words and your meaningless jargon
All of the fake love has left my soul hardened
© Emily 2014
Emily Jul 2014
I'll never know the softness of your skin
I'll never know the warmth of your smile
I'll never know the taste of your lips
I'll never know you
© Emily 2014
Her
Emily May 2014
Her
She is the summer
Hot air and **** lemonade
Kisses and passion
Haiku

© Emily 2014
Emily May 2014
Him

He led you on
He let you down
He lied to you
He made you feel small
He used you
He was blind to your feelings
He showed no care
He had no interest in you
He didn't love you
He didn't want you

Me*

I think about you all day
I go out of my way to be nice to you
I spend all my resources trying to make you happy
I care so much about your well being
I want you to be safe
I wish for your happiness
I'm totally invested in you
I like everything about you
From the way you think to the way you look
I never ignore you
I'd never give up on you
I love you

But you still prefer him
And you lie to me about it
I can't trust you anymore
© Emily 2014
Emily Nov 2015
it's not an unfamiliar touch
but it makes my body tingle
when the slightest brush of your finger
graces the top of my hand
i get a cooling sensation down my back
a smile wide across my face
and butterflies dancing in my stomach

your smile is worthy of a prize
it stems right from the lightness of your eyes
i think it stands out as more than precious
something rare
not often come by
the warmth of your smile
along with the specialness of your touch
is all part of the drawing factor
that brings me closer to you

i want to know you differently now
i want to know you better
i want to be an adult with you
i want to explore all that is your mind
and all that is your body
i want you to explore me just as equally

i love when you look at me
deep into my soul
i wish that i were around you all the time
never having a moment so dull
hold my hand
and tell me you love me
call me baby
tell me our deep thoughts
take me out for talks and long walks
play my favorite movie
and sing my favorite song

i want all that is special in your mind
just please hold my hand
that will be infinitely enough from you
to my special someone that i love so much.
Emily Jun 2014
dear you,

all i want to convey
is how much you make my every day
i know we fight, but baby, you're mine
we love each other so much
i hate the distance between us
i dream of your beautiful face
you're so full of grace
the way we met wasn't the most common of circumstances
some would say it was bizarre
but we were definitely brought together for a reason
and now you own my heart
nothing compares to your precious love
nothing is as sweet as your kisses that i dream of
i never knew that i would end up here
loving someone so worthy and pure
you make me feel so happy and secure
i feel so lucky looking into your eyes
you're radiant, you're glowing
you're my darling, my honey
thank you for loving me

always yours
© Emily 2014
Emily Nov 2015
i have a hope that we can make it through
i am trying to decide why i would ever mistreat you

i am sorry for the way that i've acted
for always being confused and distracted

i can't undo the mistakes i have made
i just don't want this love to fade

it scares me to think of a life without the one
that would be like the earth and no sun

i feel things for you that i don't quite understand
i feel like i know you like the back of my hand

but at the same time i don't
i've never known you and probably won't

it's saddening to think we live so far apart
we deserve so much more for the longing in our heart

living my life day by day, doing the same
i just want to wake up with you and feel no shame

i don't want to be embarrassed that my love is for you
everyone makes me feel like it's wrong to do

maybe nobody will ever see what i see
but at least your love makes me feel free

i feel myself, i am not ashamed
with you, the person i was meant to be, i became

thank you for giving me myself
thank you for your love, and yourself

i have a hope that we can make it through
i have a feeling i will always love you
Emily Apr 2014
I imagine our first time
So real, so raw
Infatuation at its best
True love in the rarest form
Something new yet so familiar
I don't think I'd ever stop
The light of my life
The true beginning of it all
I had no purpose before I met you
Not until I had begun to fall
Beautiful face and stunning eyes
My life with you keeps me mesmerized
Every day, you leave me wanting more
These days I'm so much happier than before
How could I ever repay you
Let you know how much you're worth
You're my inspiration
For you, I'd go to the ends of the earth
You awaken my spirit
And nurture my soul
I'm in love with you
And I hope you know
© Emily 2014
Emily Feb 2014
Physics is hard
But if it was easy
Then I wouldn't have met
My tutor
He's ****
A hot nerd
With curly hair
Bright eyes
And a sweet smile
It intoxicated me
Just for a little while
Had trouble staying focused
I'd rather look at him instead
Brains are such a turn on
I imagined us ******* on the table
I'm not ashamed to admit
I can't wait for our next session
This is becoming a dangerous habit
Maybe in class I'll pay less attention
Just so he can continue
To teach me a few things
And maybe not only about physics
© Willa 2014
How
Emily May 2017
How
How can you miss someone
You've never even met
I've never held your hand
But I miss feeling it in my palm
I've never tasted your lips
But I miss your soft kisses
I've never sensed your breath
But I miss the feel of it on my neck
I've never felt your teeth
But I miss them grazing against my shoulders
I've never had your love
But I feel empty without it
I've never heard your voice
But I keep longing to hear it
I've never touched your hair
But my fingers wish to run through it
I've never had you next to me
But I miss you
Emily Mar 2014
It's funny how you say you don't need me
You don't want me
You don't love me
Yet all you do is try and stalk me
And see what I am saying
And what I am up to
Haha
I'll just laugh at you
And your typical lies
© Willa 2014
Emily Jun 2014
The day we meet
The day I meet you in the flesh
The day my life begins
© Emily 2014
Emily Mar 2014
I've been in love
Three, maybe four times
But neither one of them
Was with you
© Willa 2014
Emily Mar 2014
Are you surrounded by friends
Do you claim to have a lover
But get all bored and let your mind wander
When you both are in bed together
Do you suffer from sadness
From possessing this hollow shell of a body
Not only of a body but of a soul
Do you have nothing left
Has ******* the life out of the ones around you finally taken its toll
Has lying and breaking hearts left you alone and broken
Taking advantage of your every day
Taking for granted those that show you love
You act like life is all a game
And maybe for now you're able to disguise
The pain, emptiness, and guilt that lives within you
But one day, it will catch up and hit you
Right in the face
© Willa 2014
Emily Mar 2014
If I could be around you
Just for one day
If I could spend a whole 24 hours
With everything going my way
I'd spend it touching you
I'd spend it loving you
I'd spend it kissing you
I'd spend it talking to you
I'd spend it getting to know every thought in your head
I'd spend it getting to know every beautiful curve that makes up your body
I'd spend it showing you how much I adore you
Even though I don't even know you
I know your face
It puts me in a daze
The tiny details I have of you
Are the little treasure pieces I hold dear and near to my heart
I'm dreaming of the day we get to meet
I'm pondering about the 24 hours I will spend making endless love to you
That's what I would do
If I had a whole day
Dedicated to someone I've never met but would very much like to meet.

© Willa 2014
Emily May 2014
I never understood why people said ignorance is bliss
Why would someone want to live in the unknown
Wouldn't they rather know the truth
But now that you've waltzed into my life
I'm beginning to understand why it is blissful to be ignorant
It feels good when you tell me how I'm the one
It feels good when you tell me that you're in love with me
That I'm all you want and dream of
You tell me you want to kiss me
And indulge in fun things all romantic relationships entail
It feels great when you assure me that we can make it
That you're over your past lovers
And purely focused on me
It's blissful believing all that is true
But now that I know the real you
I've seen your words and witnessed your lies
And now that I know it I can't help but start to despise
How easily you made me fall in love with you
And how easily you led me to believe that all of it was true
I hate myself for allowing you to
You use me to fill the void that someone else left
And now all I feel is just so much regret
I wish I could go back and blissfully ignore
The fact that you love him and he's the one you adore
I know I don't mean anything in the games that you play
I really just want you to go away
You hurt my heart, break it piece by piece
I don't want to talk to you anymore
Because all of this, I can't ignore
I'm in hell, though I wish I were not
Ignorance is bliss
And believing in you was such a foolish thought
© Emily 2014
Emily Feb 2014
Hate me
Regret me
Does it look like I care?
I have a boyfriend
I have a best friend
I go to a public ivy
I'm doing me

Hold a grudge
Be vindictive
Does it look like I care?
I'm getting job offers
I'm getting healthy
I'm doing things that make me happy
I'm doing me

Act like a *****
Call me names
Does it look like I care?
It's not like I believe you
I know you're full of sin
You're just a liar
Keep to yourself

I'm doing me
And I'm not feeling sorry
Karma is real
It'll come back around
You think you're free from me
Think again
The loss of me will haunt you
All the way to the end
© Willa 2014
Emily Mar 2014
You and I
The way we love each other
Is like we've never loved before
Giddy with loving feelings
Smiling with every glance
When we laugh
When we talk
When we kiss
When we hold each other
Everything feels right
Calmness overcomes me
I'm right where I'm supposed to be
You're the man of my dreams
Rescuing me from darkness
Saving me from myself
You're my breath of fresh air
Allowing me to breathe again
You make my world go round
When I'm with you, I'm in heaven
Almost our 6 month anniversary. Been best friends for almost 7 years. Truly blessed.

© Willa 2014
Emily Jan 2015
in a constant state of melancholy
i miss you constantly
suffocating from
the lack of the one i love  
conditioned to want you
conditioned to need you
experiencing a painful withdrawal
just take me back
Emily Aug 2015
Missing you stings my heart
Now I know why they say love hurts
Loving you is the easiest thing
And the hardest thing
I've ever had to do
I know you're the one for me
Because with you,
I am able to breathe better, easier
I don't get choked up on life anymore
Rather just choked up when I think of all the cheesy things I think about you
Sappy, yet true
If my passion for you was to be a color
It would be gold
Bright like the sun
Everlasting and precious
It is easy to love you because you make me feel at home
It is hard to love you because you are so far from home
I want to make a new home with you
I miss you
my beautiful Lauren
Emily Apr 2014
It hurts more now than it did when I first got the call
The call that changed my life
Those two years ago
The news of your passing was a shock to my system
There was no one to support me
Through such an awful and confusing time
I was all by myself
Lost on auto- pilot
Like a zombie in the night
Directionless, emotionless, numb
Over two years later
And nothing has changed
Except this time all I manage to feel
Is the after effect, the pain
The loss of you is haunting
The memories are fading
How I wish to hear your voice
How I long for your sound advice
In this world, I feel so alone
In this body, I feel so weak
In this mind, I feel so crazy
I just need you back
© Naomi 2014
Emily Mar 2014
Dear you,
You're the person who has never let me down
You've always been there when I needed someone
You lent me your ear
You gave me advice
You wiped away my tears
Held me through all my cries
You've spent your time on me
You've spent your money
And how I repay you
Is by not doing so at all
Instead I betray you
And I put our trust on the line
Now it is gone
And the fault is all mine
You deserve so much better
Than what I have to offer
I'm in a horrible place
And while that is no excuse
For what I have done
You still deserve someone to be there
And reciprocate what you do
You're the one person I love the most
And the one person I hurt tragically
By losing you, I lose myself
But I deserve this
You belong with someone else
I'll always love you
And be plagued with pain and guilt
You'll always be important to me
But now I think I should set you free
Because I hurt you so tremendously
It may be selfish
But I can't live with myself
I love you
I already miss you
One day your true love
Your beautiful princess
Will be there for you
I'm sorry
But it isn't me
Had an awful morning and fought with my best friend.

© Delia 2014
Emily May 2014
When you love someone
And you make them cry
Nothing is worse
I'd rather die
15 words.

© Emily 2014
Emily Apr 2014
I don't get it
One minute, you're full throttle
All over me
Wanting every piece of my body
Telling me to give it all to you
And then the next minute
You're distant
Not wanting to be close and intimate
Like we were before
That screws with my confidence
And worsens my insecurities
It's like a switch went off in your brain
It's hard to deal with these inconsistencies
Makes me hesitant
To give a piece of me
To you or to anybody
© Naomi 2014
Emily Mar 2014
It just takes a second
And you've popped back into my head
As if you never even left
It just takes one glimpse
One look at your photograph
And I'm awestruck with how beautiful you are
The image of you takes over
It's always been difficult to understand
The painful longing I have for you  
No, you're not mine
But when I lay my head down at night
That's when you enter my mind
That's when the fantasies begin to take form
When I am no longer in the present
But I'm transported to where
The back of my mind often lingers
A place where you surrender yourself to me
Mind, body, and soul
And my one purpose
Is to make you feel happiness and pleasure
With every breath you take
And every move you make
It's a misfortune
It's a tragedy
How you'll probably never be the one for me
And how I'll most likely never in my life
Get to relish in the fact that I hold the key to your happiness
I believe that I'll forever feel this dissatisfaction
This sickness
There is no cure
If I can't have you
© Willa 2014
Emily Jul 2014
My love was lost on you
And all the **** you put me through
People come and go
Memories fade away
But you were never here in the first place
I was cheap entertainment
I was nothing special
It didn't take much to get me to fall in love
How foolish of me to think it would've been enough
For someone like you
Someone ****** in the head
And distorted in the heart
Someone who's lied their whole life
And ripped people apart
You say others sacrifice your happiness
All for the sake of their own
But it's the other way around
Since you say anything to benefit yourself
I'll tell you what
I sacrificed everything for you
My happiness, my sanity
And all you did was abuse it
I'm letting you go
You're not the person I thought you were
I gave you a chance when nobody else did
But the way you used me is borderline morbid
It will take a while
But in due time
You will no longer cross my mind
© Emily 2014
Emily Mar 2014
I know you miss me
Though you say you hate me
And want nothing to do with me
But I know I treated you better than the rest
Because I saw it first hand
And I made it a point to be irreplaceable
I genuinely wish things could've been different between us
But you said you never loved me
And you won't stop telling lies
So with that, we're over forever
© Willa 2014
Emily Feb 2014
In time
It will **** you inside
That you gave up
On a love such as mine
© Willa 2014
Emily Nov 2015
I'm trying to compensate
For the void in my mind
With other people
With other pastimes

Nothing is very satisfying
Especially after I've crossed the line
Now I really wish
That I could just rewind

I wouldn't take advantage
Of the moments we shared
The long nights together
When our eyes would stare

Into each other
I could see your soul
Now I am empty
With nowhere to go

I wish I hadn't given up
I wish I gave us a better chance
Everything seems ruined now
Slim odds of romance

I don't think we can come back
Not from this damage
It's all my fault, I've done it to us
It was too hard to manage

I'm sorry for how I've treated you
Nothing can take back the things I've said
I'm sorry for how I gave up on you
Nothing can take back the things I did

Despite my tragic flaws
You still treat me as if I'm the best
You love me unconditionally
Every day I am blessed

What did I ever do to deserve you
I ask myself why I don't try harder
Why I'm not on my knees begging
Why didn't I act smarter

All these questions
Swimming in my head
I know I want this to last
To clean up all I've bled
Emily Apr 2014
When you ignore me
I'm stabbed with disappointment
And plagued with loneliness
Why do you do it
I don't get it
I thought this was love
I thought this was real
I guess to you, it's all a joke
I can't put myself through it again
I won't
© Naomi 2014
Emily Apr 2014
Can't you see
That without you
I am empty
A day without you
Is like a year without rain
A terrible drought
Feeling nothing but pain
It's harder to breathe
When you're not around
I wish you would realize
That without you I'm down
You lift my spirits
You take me higher
I want you forever
You're all I desire
Don't let me go
And give me a chance
I was made for you
To give you this romance
See me for who I truly am
And never stop loving me
Let's come together
And embark on this journey
© Emily 2014
Emily Mar 2014
There's only one way
That this will end
And I doubt it'll be
In favor of me
God only knows
Why I keep fighting
But I'd rather do that
Than nothing at all
© Delia 2014
Emily Jun 2014
Laying on the couch
Thinking of your lips against mine
And how I'll smile as we kiss
Tell you I love you
And escape to a place I've never been
You're my heaven
© Emily 2014
Emily Jul 2014
She floats on the lake
Bikini top untied
Sipping a beer in one hand
Smoking a cigarette in the other
Talking to me
Sun in her eyes
Squinting into the sky
Her thick accent
An unglamorous moment
But ****, she's never looked better
She makes everything look good
Perfect body and tan skin
I want her right there in the water
But I'm stuck there just watching her
Fantasy land at its best
She makes me feel like such a mess
Always keeps it interesting
There's never a dull moment
Her jokes, her dry humor
Are all the things I love about her
My heart races as she floats to me
She gives me a kiss
I'm stuck in that moment forever
The water is crystal clear
A beautiful sight to see
But fixated on her are my eyes
I'm completely mesmerized
My love
© Emily 2014
Emily Mar 2014
All I can do is laugh
After all
You're just one big joke
© Willa 2014
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