I fell in love with you in the purchase of a postage stamp
I put your face and body and mind on paper
The way your hair curls
The way you jump with excitement and flap your arms
like a kid would on Christmas morning
How you were always there to turn to
Although I couldn't turn to you because you were never there
And by there I mean here, with me, where you should've been
I fell in love with the train tickets to you
The little orange squares like golden tickets
Granting me access to see you
To touch you
To share the foam of my coffee and laugh with you
at the man dancing at the hot dog stand
And when you finally stepped through my doorway
I swear it was Christmas and my birthday all at once
Planting my head on your chest
We bloomed and grew to heights I never knew was possible
And while little flowers blossomed at the ends of my fingertips
they grew on the tip of your tongue as you uttered those words
Those words to whom I have told but one; you
If I could find a word to describe the feeling of reading
the last several pages of a book you know has become your favourite
I would tell it to you
The hours that we whiled away and the ones that took up
the most of our day to get to each others arms before they took another’s
all meant something
And while the last bitter-sweet pages of our story have been read
Know that there's a girl who still writes you
You dance on the pages of her notebook
And while the postage stamps stay un-licked
She sends these poems to you
For in her mind you will always stay

Is there a word for a moment in time where we feel absolute bliss?
It happens every so often – these rare nuggets of gold
We have to sift through dark, cloudy puddles to find them
And we stumble upon these rare treasures; they clink on the pan

We dangled our legs off the dock
Eating our sandwiches we picked up on the way;
talk lessened between each bite we took
But the wind was just right and the sun on it's way down
There was an even distribution of clouds amongst the sky

A stone landed in the water. Clink. Bliss.
I looked at you. Your curls pushed back, your eyes focused
on the other side of the bank

I jumped right in the deep end and came out gasping for air
Resting on the poolside; my suit clinging to the rise and fall of my stomach
Impatiently I wait for my normal breathing pattern to return
But my lungs are simply refusing to co-operate
I feel like if I sit on the side of the pool for too long I will forget how to swim
Unsure if whether to just dive right in again and kick my legs as fast as my heart races
I drum my fingers on the cold, ceramic surface and wiggle my toes in the water
Staying even after pool closing time
I might drink another glass of wine just to warm my insides
Pretending like I don't know how long it's been
6 weeks yesterday – 6 weeks and a day, today
My mind fuzzy like static off a TV screen
Wanting, not, to spend my life on mute
But my screams only escape my mouth as whispers
Or as songs that once used to belong to us
The songs that filled the intervals of your play

They'll say “there's plenty other fish in the sea”
But he was a shark
And I was a guppy
He had swallowed me whole
and spat me back out
Now I am floating around
Lifelessly
And the 'sea' that I swim?
It's a load of old crap
I'm too far away from the shore
and the ocean's way too large to explore
Especially now I'm on my own
With only the company of my tears
Instead, I will be engulfed by ******* comfort
from my worrying peers
Whilst I dangle my legs numbly off of the pier
Bottle in hand and him on my mind
with pain tingling up from my spine
They'll say “move on” and “give it time”
but time seems to not be on my side
for it moves too painfully slow
I only feel good when I'm not awake
When I'm in public I fear I might break
I can't look people in the eye
It's not because I'm shy
But because I am scared they will see what is swimming inside
Those waves in my stomach
that make me feel queasy
always find their way to the surface, ever so easy

I asked him “what am I to you?”
and he replied “you are the breeze to my sail
helping me to outrun the ship on my tail”
And when he looked down at his feet
he said “now what about me?”
And I uttered “you are indeed the ship I am pushing,
but away from whom? From the person you love.
The one who first made you swoon”
His cheeks were filled with a deep crimson
as I whispered “Look, I am just a distraction”
I've no air in my lungs left to sail your boat
and I'm afraid this means you'll no longer float.
And that ship on your tail, will catch up with you
And I cannot stress enough that there's only room for two
in that small boat of yours
with the holes in the floors
left by me, battered by the sea.
But I can see, you did indeed love me
But there's never enough space in the heart
for more than one partner
And for you to see better days
this breeze must eventually fade away
So you are right to head away
to the place where the sun shines all day
And I hope you can reach land
And feel warm on the sand
And all I wish is for you to shed a tear
when you receive a postcard saying
“Wish you were here”

When you leaned right in
and kissed me on the forehead
though I have a fringe

The torrential rain
flooding the station, your hand
tighter round my hair

Trying to be fun
and romantic; lifting me
up “I'm not that strong”

Rain through the circle
of trees, buckling at my
knees; you in my coat