I imagine her night –
her winter, her dark – better
defined your light,
the same way black velvet
offers a showy diamond.

A diamond,
your diamond,
full of beans,
along with mine,
full of shrieks,

seeds we’ve germinated.
Yours is tall and yellow;
mine blue and pensive.
Kindred, we
dream a garden for them.

I wish I could be happy,
But I can't.
I wish I didn't have to fake smile,
But I can't.
I wish things were different,
That I was different,
That we were different
But we're not.
Nothing ever changes,
And nothing ever will.

I thought I'd take the leave,
Release the grasp of my love,
My love that never shone through;
Yet I stumble upon a piece or two,
Reminiscing the song of words,
Painful, yes, but touching, as well.

I would admit, some of my rambles
Spew out of my mind when I see you;
A picture, a message, a thought of you, even,
You set my mind fuzzy, yet you make it best me;
Knowing that our hearts can never beat as one,
It fills me with bereavement.

I know time will come that I'll forget you,
Make your existence feeble in my world,
I wished this time would soon come;
Yet, I wish to savor your company,
Even if you don't feel the same for me;
Even if I am feeble to your world.

It's repeating like a broken tune;
The voices in my head,
They speak of you and me,
Of how you would symmetrize my derangements,
And send my flow gushing endlessly;
Of how you make me feel so happy, yet sad.

"I can't make you love me, if you don't",
"I can't make you mine, if I'm nothing",
"I can't be the one to make you happy",
And I won't force you to be.
I'm lost and I can't find my way;
Maybe it's better to be lost; to be deafened by truth.