Depression is being so tired every minute of every day
that finding the energy to get out of bed is taxing.
Depression is not wanting to be around people you know you love
because the thought of explaining how you are really doing is heartbreaking.
Depression is drowning in an ocean of your thoughts
while everyone around you scolds you because you should ‘know how to swim.’
Depression is being so confused as to why you feel the way you do
because everyone declares that happiness is a choice you have to choose to make.
Depression is avoiding even looking in the mirror
because you’ve surpassed the point of self-hate.
Depression is being stranded on an island and having the tools to signal for help
but not being able to read the language of the instructions on the label.
Depression is being surrounded by people who love you
but feeling completely alone and unloved.

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my *******,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

watch me
as i undress;
pull off the sheets
of an ancient chest.
i give you now
the long lost key;
go on, my dear
and unlock me.

i know you seek
a work of art
but all you'll find
is a rusty heart
with rusty gears
that spin no more
yes, i'm broken
from the core.

"hold on," you say.
you hold my heart
and gently fix it
part by part,
then with such grace
you place it in;
working smooth
as how it's been
a billion years
before it failed;
before false love
my heart impaled.

i’m afraid that someone will meet my lips and taste stale cereal and close the lid. i’m afraid someone will open my heart and reveal cobwebs and old books about death and that i will have to explain and decorate, apologizing under my breath and they will never feel at home. i crave human affection in every way but i’m afraid my skin feels like sandpaper and my eyes are an abyss of the razors from my past and my tongue is nothing but a loaded gun with bad aim. people want soft grass and dandelions and cotton scented bed sheets and i am a splinter in the fingertip of their love.

i'm afraid i am nothing but a vampire who ***** the life out of anything that looks my way. i'm afraid that my nightmares will become reality and i will be the villain. i'm afraid that my bed will feel like spikes under his back. i'm afraid my demons will begin to haunt him if he gets too close. i'm so afraid that my knives will dull and it will be more painful than i intended. no one wants a destructive person to hold their ******* hand.

i'm afraid that i am none of these things and that my eyes will turn red at midnight. but even more so, i am afraid he will still find me beautiful and that i will **** him.

This is the last time I’ll see you,
the last chance to tell
just what it is about you,
that’s captured me so well.

I came so close to saying,
I came so close, you know.
How I wish you were staying,
but perhaps it’s best you go.

Maybe I’ll move on now,
now that you are gone.
I’d say I’ll forget somehow,
but we both know I’d be wrong.

They say first love never dies,
how am I to know?
Love- a word that never applies,
emotions that never show.

I said I don’t believe in love,
it’s simply not for me.
But then push came to shove,
and suddenly I could see.

You’re the perfect one for me,
but, alas, I’ve let you go.
To point out the things that we could be
is the lowest of the low.

Love is still shrouded in doubt,
at least for me, for now.
But so close to learning what it’s about,
you slipped away somehow.

This is goodbye, I’m moving on,
I hope you’ll understand.
I’d like to think that with you gone,
I’ll return from this dreamland.

This is goodbye, this is farewell,
it’s been fun indeed.
I hope you’ll return with stories to tell,
Something tells me you’ll succeed.