Just because you think you know
My story from someone I used to trust,
Doesn't make you my 
Personal advertiser. 

You can't see through my bluff,
Although you pretend to, because
You're not the first to pull this on me.  
I've had practice, you won't win. 

I made a mistake once, and I 
Made it again. Shoot me. 
I promise you, I won't 
Tell anyone, ever again. 

You don't have to announce it 
For the gods to hear, I act like I don't care,
Don't care how everyone looks
At me different now. 

So you became my mother now, 
Did you? Go on. Be disappointed.
Do it and I'll treat you like my mother.
Like I don't give a ****.

So you turned me into 
A monster, didn't you? 
All while telling me:
"I understand, really"

Now I know.
It all comes down to trust.
Trust, trust, trust, trust, trust...
Trust is a *****. 

I hate you. As much as I hated 
The other person who did this to me. 
As much as I hate myself. 
I ******* Hate You.

There's a lot for you to learn, kid. (Mind you, I call everyone kid, don't take it personally.)

Make friends with her sisters, make sure her mother doesn't hesitate to call you her "sweetie". If you do that, you've secured yourself in a place very close to her heart. If her family can love you, she will love you.

If there's an insect on her radar, you get rid of it, no questions asked, no please and thank you. You get it done.

I don't care if dancing isn't your "style", that's one thing you can't take away from her. So it will just make your life easier if you just dance with her. Trust me.

Argue with her. Stand up for yourself. There are times when the fire in her eyes grows and feeds on your submission. It will burn her too, I promise. Douse it and any doubt she may have in her mind about your commitment.

She is one of the most driven, fearless, determined, and independent women I know that graces this earth. But there are times when her past spoils are not enough to appease her and she can and will drown in self-hate. I implore you to save her from herself in these times. She is worth too much. Hold her close and rub her back and tell her reasons for your love with each vertebrae you massage.

This girl will love you with every inch of her possible. She will love you wholeheartedly, she will give you everything she's got. Don't you dare give her anything less. Don't waste her time.

Gifts are always really special to her. She has this way of always getting you something you wanted, regardless of if you knew it. Her gifts are quirky and clever and incredibly thought-out. Appreciate them, please.

There will come a night where both of you will have fire for blood and lust for thoughts. Be gentle, be loving. Make her feel safe.

She gives many different kinds of kisses. She'll give you a quick kiss as you both head out the door, she'll give you these spontaneous kisses that will send smiles through every inch of you, every time. She'll give you kisses that make you question your self control. She'll lie on top of you and give you butterfly kisses with her eyelashes.

One thing she doesn't do is get jealous. Don't you take advantage of that. If she ever does, you’ll never know it. She won’t question you going out with friends or not replying to her texts. She will trust you with all her heart. Don’t **** that up.

I am begging you, demanding of you: do not hurt her. Hold her close to your heart. She will memorize the way it beats and she'll always be able to tell when you fall asleep.

Hopefully you won't have the same demons as I. But rest assured that if you do, she will recognize that all demons are just fallen angels and she will bring light and love back to your shadowed mind.

If you're the one that makes her the happiest, I hope you never have to feel the pain of losing her.

This girl is the last bit of gold in this world, don’t let that shine fade out. Give her every ounce of your being and she will do the same. You will never, ever be loved the way she loves again. You will never have to ask anything of the Universe again.

Sincerely,
A name you'll hear in passing.

P. S. I hope you like football.

P. P. S. I shouldn't have to tell you any of this. This shouldn't motivate you to treat her right. You should know instantly in your heart that this girl is precious and that you should cherish her. If your love for her doesn't make you want to do that, then don't waste your time. She deserves better.

We are critical.

We find flaws in
everything we see
because nobody
wants to write
about perfection,
even though sometimes
we wish we could just stay
staring into that
unblemished surface.

2. We are never satisfied.

We live our lives upon
mountains of
scrunched up
bits of refill and
ideas we gave up
trying to
express.

3. We never forget.

We write words about
eye contact made
three months ago
that we replay over
and over in our minds
even though it
stopped
being relevant.

4. We are fickle.**

Our emotions flash
from one
to the other
like strobe lighting that
disorientates us
until we feel as if
the world
will never be still.

5. We are exposed.

We don't know how
to keep our feelings
to ourselves so
we'll write them
down for
you to find
'accidentally'.

6. We are vulnerable.

We wear our
hearts on our sleeves
and won't lift a
muscle to fight back
if somebody tries
to break it
because we thrive
from the pain.

7. We will never stop.

We will never stop
feeling and
we will never stop
hurting,
we will never stop
breaking and
bleeding and
loving
even though the cycle
is endless
and we know what's
coming next.


We are addicted
to agony,
but we agonise
for the art.

Everyone is a light.
Most are like chandeliers,
Fanciful yet pretentious.
Oh please, one lamp is enough.
But then there are some
Very rare, very precious
Candles, lighting the path
for others,
Even if it spells their own demise.
And these are the people
That will earn respect,
Reverence,
honor.
And these are the people
That will not die drowning
In their own tears of regret.

Chauncey was a gardener
At least that’s what was said
His roses were his masterpiece
A perfect shade of red
Petals always perfect
Satin was their feel
Appearing artificial
Though every one was real
Every day he tended
The weeds he’d bend and pick
His plants they stood so straight and tall
Aided by a stick
Bound with fabric wire
Green about the stem
He would gaze for hours
He was so proud of them
Surrounded by such beauty
Still something was amiss
He loved his precious flowers
On a wondrous day like this
But in his heart was lacking
The affection he required
He was a lonely gardener
Now growing in desire
Until the fateful morning
When up his path she walked
Captured by her smile
He could hardly talk
A very special woman
Had come into his life
He was very certain
He’d make this girl his wife
His heart was filled with happiness
Beneath the skies above
For Chauncey was a gardener
And Chauncey was in love
Her beauty was so precious
From her head down to her toes
When he looked into her eyes
He saw the perfect rose
Every day was special
In all that they would do
She told him that she loved him
He said, “I love you too.”
His heart was steady beating
His smile grew so wide
As if a wondrous garden
Was blooming deep inside
The fragrance overwhelming
The colors bright and new
He found it hard believing
That all of this was true
There was one little problem
They lived so far apart
The missing, it was growing
Tearing at her heart
She promised she would love him
Until her dying day
But it was getting harder
He lived so far away
Then he received a letter
From the one he did adore
She told him she was sorry
But she needed so much more
He pleaded “reconsider”
He loved her oh so much
She said that she believed him
But missed his loving touch
Dark clouds started forming
So black upon the sky
He found that he was all alone
His garden it had died
He looked on wilted blossoms
Fading quick to brown
Nothing much was beautiful
Growing from the ground
Weeds as tall as buildings
Thorns to rip his skin
He locked up tight the garden gate
He’d never tend again
He sat beneath an oak tree
For months it seemed to be
When sprouting from the soil
A spot of green to see
He watched as it was growing
It seemed to call his name
It wrapped around his ankles
Out in the pouring rain
When a shadow formed behind him
The sun began to glow
A figure was approaching
Someone he did know
Closer it was moving
There before his eyes
The plant that wrapped around him
He suddenly realized
She had come to find him
Her heart broken in two
She told him that she loved him
He said, “I love you too”
She said that she was sorry
But she was just afraid
Fear of getting hurt again
The decisions she had made
He promised he would love her
Forever and a day
She did not need to worry
He would not go away
He wants to only love her
And make her life complete
Her love was oh so perfect
His lonely heart did meet
And then just like a miracle
Because his love she’d chose
Out there in his garden
Bloomed a perfect rose
Sparrows started singing
The skies a lovely blue
He told her that he loved her
She said, “I love you too”