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**** did he have a smile i used to always tell him to stop smirking at me and i don’t think he understood why i did, but every time his smile lit up every time every time he smirked when i said something to him  every time his eyes lit up like a christmas tree the crinkles in his cheeks made this perfect pattern.I fell more in love with him  
he was  beautiful.
he told me he never cared about me and it took me a while but i found out i was gonna be okay with it because you change for the ones you love. I fought loving you for a while because at the time i wasn’t even sure i knew how to love someone anymore after last time but ******* did he  teach me. Everytime he called me, every time he calmed me down when no one else could even make me flinch
every time he helped fix me no matter what it was he could make me smile and i think i slowly forgot how to fix myself because i had him and i thought that he'd always be there i mean that was what he had promised wasn’t it? I lost all self reliance but i felt safe  And when he left I tried to get over him by just being with random people but their lips never made me actually feel anything; not once did they send shivers down my spine and i never go to bed smiling anymore, and not once did i care when they left finding out i wasn’t ready to be with anyone after him. He was easily my favorite mistake and even though he’s  gone from my life I’m glad we had talked that night and tragically enough i wouldn’t take it back for anything
i wrote this when we were apart

the stillness
of some nights
has few equals

owls sounds
out of nowhere
under this canopy

honeyed darkness
wrapped around
my lonely steps
All these poems are from The California Notebook collection from www.annamosca.com

http://annamosca.com/2015/03/11/nights-california-notebooks-2015/
Change is like a wind.....
It comes when least expected
There is nothing better than setting skies,
Or the way you smile with your tired eyes.
When our fingers hug and our knuckles kiss
When you trace my skin, moments like this are something I'll miss.
Don't forget me once you are gone,
Know I'll be thinking of you at dusk and at dawn.
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