A subject
I've never been good at
it's a 
subject
often spoken 
about. 

What did I learn?
you say.
Not so sure
I add.

What I found
was subtracted and
what was lost
Unexpected.

The sun 
at its highest
waking up anyone
in its path
laying there 
beating heart
and a breathing chest

we were 
never tired before;
comfort hits.
A laugh
appears 
obnoxiously attractive.

Half asleep
meaning
aware of what we’re doing
yet unaware of what will 
happen

to doze off into
a sudden yet needed
dream,
A dream to my 
sweet reality.

the clouds around me 
they feel differently
they don’t look familiar
they smell like nothing

I wonder what happened
what made them so cloudy
what made me run away
despite how heavy 

I love how they look
yet so confused as to how
something so colorful on the outside
but plain white as a cloud

I’ll continue to admire
from a distance not too close
since they traveled from somewhere i knew
in a place filled with hope.

they say its a key
but I don’t need to unlock it
when I've seen
what's behind them

it doesn't prevent it
but rather demotivates
me 

Yet I sustain
my hope
and wonder.

I push on
until I set off
and I do so 
with as much knowledge
in my head 
as I have power
in my legs.

I hate this
absolutely hate this
how do I 
embrace this?

what's there to
hold
in my mind and
in my hands

I want to
want 
hope
but I can’t 
seem to grasp it

I'm waiting 
for the day
to come
what can I do
with 
what I have?