She left me

It hurt

Ow my heart

I will get better

I will survive

Love is pain

Ow

Our love was like a kite string

I couldn't hold on for too long

the wind was really strong

whoa watch out for that wind

****, it's like a hurricane out in this ****

Wow, I'm very heartfelt

Hopefully someone sleeps with me after I read this at the slam

I

am

not afraid

of birth

People seem to fear

losing this chaotic

fight to the world

I see no fear in the newborn

I see screams owing nothing

I see a cry out to declare

"Yes I am alive, I exist"

and calm settles in after life's first breath

I

am

not afraid

of middle age

the ego death

the rending of the self

and the questions bombarded asking me

"is any of this all worth it?"

As I see many people on the path

of anxiety

I can't help but wonder

how one can fear death

if they worry so much about life being worth it

One doesn't worry about being robbed of

an empty bank account

They seek instead to fill it

to save

to leave something behind for loved ones

When I was a boy I fell out the pocket

I fell out the pocket

I dropped down

Left instead to the beats in my head

Which called me ahead to a timeline

Where I prettied up the ambience to the end rhyme

Given a first rate view into the sounds; I drew

Wrote and only knew how I could combine

intertwine and multitudinous vines

of personalized style defined

into my lockstep, rock depth

So do I search for meaning in a land of intrigue

Do I look for a song in the silence, in the air that I breathe?

Or given the choice do I add to the mix?

Given the choice now do I voice that I can add to this rift?

Break open the barricades and give a name to this shift?

Give it a flow, give it a flare, give a decision, commit

Bring it in low, give it a lift, give it a rhythm to drift

Don't give into shiftless insistency, sometimes cadence begs immediacy

Give it a rest, give it a pause, know that some of it hurts

But give it the Barricadence, I think you'll find that it works

I'm not afraid of being called egotistical

For having convictions, for feeling like I matter

But not in that "it matters inside"

Like I'm some hipster flavor of the month

Because if Kim Kardashian is relevant I'm ******* relevant

Tell me what sandwich Kanye ate after he wiped his *** today

Tell me how One Direction smoked ***, and wrote a good song finally

Tell me how Arcade Fire thinks electronic music is lesser when they

Record their tracks using a DAW

Tell me how you think Jimmy Page was a sloppy guitarist and then show

me your discography, I probably don't like it as much

Tell me I'm wasting my time, and then go clock back in at work

I'll do the same

Because if Kim Kardashian is relevant I'm ******* relevant

Tell me writing is a subjective craft

Tell me my writing *****

Tell me I'm not touching on any real points

Tell me I'm being too specific

Tell me I don't express myself enough

Tell me to shut the **** up

Tell me I'm a voice for the people

Tell me I should calm down

Tell me to keep writing and working with no recognition

Because if Kim Kardashian is relevant I'm ******* relevant.

Tell me to ignore those facts and keep going anyway

Cause I'll do it, and I'll write this ******* poem about it

I think what really kills me

is to see a guy pour out his guts

about how hard his life is

how committed to the struggle he is

and how much conviction he has

(with his daddy's trust fund)

I could really learn to get behind his success

if I just ignored that he's a rich man's son

I grew up poor, I grew up brown

so I'm Mr "What a big ******" when my thoughts came out

about how I have hopes for a brighter tomorrow

or that life's too short, we're on a track that we borrow

So now I hear succinctly that there's guys who say distinctly

How they're fed up with the system and they hate the gender binary

They're enlightened, in the know, and they're really having fun

Because this **** is easy when you're a rich man's son.

Oh, so I grew up in a small town

A suburban uncultured brown, public school GPA high

That's nice, I like how they let things slide for you guys

getting high, dealing dope, chilling with weirdos

and not the weirdos you know, the kind with emotional, physical, and ****** hangups

and not "wee we're so ******* different"

Because we never got praise, we only worked with a backdrop

Hoping maybe someday we'd get the key to the padlock

But it doesn't matter you say, there ain't a place left to run

Because it's easy not to care when you're a rich man's son

It's always the ones with power, the one's who hold royal flushes

Who say "money can't help you, I feel so out of touch with"

all the nature that I have the money to afford to go visit on a whim

Because the world is an oyster that I have yet to sink in

While I'm hoping for you, you get the point when it's done

That not everyone gets the chance to emote like the rich man's son

I built my kingdom from my grit; I'm not a rich man's son

I learned that no one gives a ****; I'm not a rich man's son

I've no promo but my mouth; I'm not a rich man's son

I've got the battle on my back, I'll be a rich man, son

I've formulated my attack, I'll be a rich man, son

I got my loving back on track, I'll be a rich man, son

If I want to stay intact, I'll be a rich man, son.

Your father loves you boy, so you're a rich man's son

Don't care if I can't have the toys, cause I'm a rich man's son

My father loves me to the death, so I'm a rich man's son

"Dad life is pretty hard, don't think I'm having fun"

"Jake, you've got to make yourself, I don't care what the other kids have done"

"If you can only do one thing, and yes I only ask one"

*"Be the best at that, there's ever been, will you do that son?"

I get accused of a lot of things at first glance

"You're simplistic, you're hiding something

You have no convictions, you don't think deeply"

Usually by those who I consider to be on intellectual crutches

If you're gonna come up to talk to me from a religious context

from a spiritual context

from a hierarchical, metaphysical, eat this **** popsicle mindset

Don't expect me to swallow

Don't expect me to talk

You won't like what I have to say

Because really you just want me to agree with you

If you want me to respect your framework

When you have nothing but the claims of quacks

and the feelings you gleaned from your last psychedelic trip

to back you up

While I have to sit back and listen to how I'm close minded

Close minded for wanting some real truth in this universe

unfiltered, raw, verifiable, and in my hand

and that anything other than that is a spray paint over

my true awakening

Then I guess I'll just have to be that *******

to die for these intellectual sins

The Eldest Son of Matt, hater of pretense

Hypocrite to the highest level

Build me up into a figure of idolatry

Just like you do with the rest of your ego cases

Priests, Gurus, Rabbis, Rockstars, Poet sensations

Tell me how wonderful it is to listen to them

Tell me how I should be more in touch with a tree

Tell me how I don't dream

When all my life is but that

Tell me how I'm not deep when you make no attempt to learn

Who I am, and where I have come from

Misinterpret my teachings, and claim me to feel

As if I was the newest son of god

When all I want is for people to get beyond blinders

and love each other, and to get beyond the metaphysical rat race

Tell me that I'm supposed to live and let live

While you jam your beliefs down my throat

and expect me to respect getting philosophically tea bagged

******* to the crucifix

and asking me to repent for my search for truth

Yes I saw the truth in the hillside freeway

In the grilled cheese sandwich

for sale on Ebay

With tortillas and butter they called me a ******

Because I saw the truth in the eyes of another

Who decided to feed me a line of such rapture

That captured my stature of pragmatic backed banter

Gathered the trappings disbanded, I could map out the standard

Wanting the pattern, the vibrancy frequented

Masking the latency, the reader obsequious

Addressing the nuance, ignoring complacency

Significance amplified, convinced of this elevated

Power to axiom, entropy celebrated

Wax to a fault with a message converted

While the layers of encryption serve to hold this position

A raw disposition, hoping to see beyond this decision

I can't see beyond the scope of the eye with conviction.