Dear mamma,
Can't you see? That I'm a mess over here.
That I keep crying everyday, for that boy who broke my heart.

Dear mamma,
Can't you see? That my lungs long to be free.
That I keep words I shouldn't say, and it is killing me inside.

Dear mamma,
Can't you see? That your words are what makes me bleed.
That this scars are part of me.

Dear mamma,
Can't you see? It is not my fault, that's who I'm meant to be.
That it breakes my heart to know, a grandchild I will never give.

Dear mamma,
Can't you see? The way you stare, makes me scared, I know I'm a wreck but I'll be best.

Hush mamma,
Let me speak, I am terrified of being here.
That what is yet to come, terrifies me to my bones.

Dear mamma,
Can't you see? That I can see, how much you wish I wasn't me.

Dear mamma,
Please forgive, I know I am a mess but I'll come clean.

You have done it again
I fell for your lies
And your twisted games.

I fell for your guilt
Mistake it for love
Believed you wanted me
But you were still with him.

I was in pieces, broken
Then you came over
Step on what was left of me
Said you were sorry
And turn back
To stare at your lover.

This time
Broken I was not,
But shattered instead.

The worst part is still
How much
My heart thinks
Of you.

Why is it that I always shake when I'm anxious?
Re-reading our old messages, and skipping through pages.
You enjoyed every inch of every word that I had said,
I yearn so deeply to be the only thought that runs through your head.

I replay in my mind every second of our last conversation,
The tension that hung heavy in a room where my words now stay wasted,
On a man who only pretended he cared,
All the promises he made tucked messily in a box somewhere.

I am now neurotic and obsessive,
But I'm young and won't learn my lesson.

I'll spend the next few months dreaming of you as I lay in bed,
Shaking and cold and out of breath,

Because I tossed away, into you, all that I had left.

His body emerged
From the deep blue ocean
Heart barely beating and
Eyes almost closed

They left him for dead.

The sun's light burned him
And its heat suffocated him
But he kept wondering
How would it feel
To touch the sun.

Once again,
Icarus rose
Towards the sun

Believing this time
Things would be different
But as long as the sun
Remains the sun
And Icarus
A blind believer
Fate won't change its course

So, once again,
Icarus fell.
And found himself
More broken
Than before.