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I Am Lost.
I hurt all over again.
Because I cannot forgive.
I try, but I still resent those who stubbed me straight through the heart.
My Family.
My ex Lovers.
My Community.
I want to let it all go.

This is a prayer of my hurting, breaking and bleeding heart.
Help me.
Help me LET GO
Of all that cause my tears to soak my pillow most days.
Help me.
Teach Me.
To forgive.
To let go.
To Heal.

I need You.
I can't do asylums no MORE.
I Don't want to cut anymore.
Help Me Jesus.
I know you are out, up there somewhere.
Help  me.
Please.

©The Unspoken
This is a prayer, a cry from deep within me.
 Apr 2014 Instrospect
M
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 Apr 2014 Instrospect
M
"Love people for all of them, not just the good or easy parts"
One day
I want to write a poem
That captures your soul
In the adjectives
Describing the sky

One day
I want to write a sentence
That you will carry
In your memory
Scarred and stained
For an infinity

One day
I want to write a short story
Of a guy
A lot like you
And a girl
A lot like me
With no lies
Only honesty
And a forever that lasted
Just a while

One day
I want to write a paragraph
About the sea in you
And the sea in me
And how we fell in
Each other
And never needed to come up for air

One day
I want to write a dictionary
With all of our own definitions
Of everyone else's words
It will start from the letter Z
And end on A
Because it will be easier
That way

One day
I want to write an essay
On how the sunlight
Made patterns on your skin
Even after you lied
And shadowed the constellations
Screaming honesty
Into the dark

One day
I want to write a novel
About the way your voice
And his voice
Sounded
Just before
You both were about to cry

One day
I want to write lyrics
For the song
I meant to sing to you
About the moon
And the sun
And how they dance
Whenever all of our eyes are closed
Even if it's just for a second
(Light
Always travels faster
Than sound)

One day
I want to write you a telegram
With someone else's hand
To tell you
How much I miss you
And how my heart
Is not in my chest anymore
Really-
It's shattered across the sky
Just for you to see

One day
I want to write you a letter
To tell you
That you didn't know what love is
And neither did I

But
I still love you
Once I spoke the language of the flowers,
Once I understood each word the caterpillar said,
Once I smiled in secret at the gossip of the starlings,
And shared a conversation with the housefly
in my bed.
Once I heard and answered all the questions
of the crickets,
And joined the crying of each falling dying
flake of snow,
Once I spoke the language of the flowers. . . .
How did it go?
How did it go?
when my pride becomes    unbearable
I coalesce into                       nothing.
I rush to You in                     love,
with courage to be                vulnerable.
asking for                               help,
so I can                                     live.
First line inspired by comment by r that pride was unbearable in response to first version of this poem.  Thanks r.  A whole new poem rose out of reworking the first line.
I want to be your fantasy, your reality,

And everything between

I want you to see me in your sweetest dreams

I want you to feel me in everything your hands touch

I want the taste of me to never leave your lips

I want to be the world to you, I just want it all

I want to be the eyes that get to look deep inside your soul

I want to be your deepest kiss

The answer to your every wish

I want you to never ever let me go

I want to be hidden inside your heart

I just want to be everywhere you are

I want you to hold me too tight

I want you to make everything alright

I want to be loved too much by you

I just want you to need me

Like I need you.

© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved
 Mar 2014 Instrospect
R Saba
on the way home
i listened to music
that made me think of you
blessing each note
with my mind, saying
"thank you for understanding
every single time"
and i say this to the music
because i cannot say it to your face
and yes, i just compared you
to the corner of my life
where everything is sound and i feel safe
and yes, it is
a compliment
simple truth
"It's a shame,"
A mother  says to her daughter,
"that such pretty girls think such dark things."

But there it is --
The very reason why us girls think thoughts so dark:
There is beauty in death.

As soon as we're gone,
People suddenly want us.
Celebrities will pray for the poor young lost soul,
We'll suddenly be beautiful in everyone's eyes --
And everyone will want to be our friend.

Suddenly those bullies want forgiveness,
And your out-of-your-league crush likes you back.

You'll never age -- a constant beauty.
You'll be pure -- negativity buried with your body.
You'll be smart -- the one "with the bright future."

Suddenly we're wanted,
Missed
Mourned
Loved
We've gotten all we've been searching for!
But what good does it do us,
if we'll never feel the suns warmth again?
Never again to catch loose snowflakes,
Or smell the spring dafodils?

If you can bring yourself to never laugh again,
To never kiss again,
To never dream again,
Then it's on you.
But don't tell me you'll go without regret:

Maybe you'd still be alive if someone told you sooner?
Maybe we should stop praising those who take their lives?

~C E Smith
 Mar 2014 Instrospect
M
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 Mar 2014 Instrospect
M
"Why do you look at me so much?"
maybe because I think God wove his best when He made your story
maybe because I think He struck gold when he built your heart
maybe because I think there's nothing more beautiful than your mind
maybe because I'd like to look through the world with your eyes
maybe because God made your hair to perfectly flow past my fingers
maybe because I'm in love with you
maybe because I have been in love with you
maybe because I was in love with you

silence.

..."What do you mean? No, I don't."
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