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pluie d'été Jan 2017
he blew a kiss to me
across the garden
I thought that I felt it land on my cheek
but it must have landed on
the sunset instead

The stars were beautiful that night
pluie d'été Apr 2016
What I am about to say
Will save you
From a great sadness

1. Don't ever caress your broken heart in your hands
The blood will stain your finger tips scarlet
And be imprinted on the next person you hold.

2. Don't succumb
To the comforting grey side
Of Sadness
I know its warm. I know its safe.
But its only all those things
Because darling,
It will never leave.

3. Don't keep things hidden.
Who are you?
How can you even think of not being the main character of your story?

4. Don't read books about girls being left behind, and about boys dying
Or about people who are too afraid
Or too courageous
Or whose main characters are liars
Who come alive when you look into
Their eyes.

5. Don't let your heart pull away from him
Because you feel like
"You love him too much"
He won't understand why
You are holding his heart
And your own.

6. Don't start writing when you are sad.
The ink won't be able to run from your fingers when you are happy
And you will be left without the words you have
Become addicted to-

You will hold your heart in your hands
And you will pick at its stitches to feel
And your heart will bleed
And it will stain your fingertips red.

You will reach out to him,
And your will leave scarlet smears across his cheek
And his chest
And his wrist
And no matter how many times
You kiss
The stain will stay

And you will
Wrap yourself in the soft grey
And the Sadness will swear
To always stay
And you will feel loved
Because it will never leave.

And you will start to hide it-
The warm grey
The phone call
An opinion
The fight you had
The tears and words
That want to come out

And you will turn to books
Not to escape
But to learn
About other
I's and hers and hims
And their words will come out
Black and white
The next time
He whispers
'I love you' in your ear.

And then you will start to pull away
You love him too much
And that means he is going to leave
And he will look at you and see
That you have his heart
And your heart
But it will be too late for him to
Have kept yours
And it will be too late for you to keep his.

And suddenly
It will be Saturday night
And he will still be yours
But it will feel like he's
And you will pull the thread

Of soft grey.
pluie d'été Feb 2016
It is infinite
The way we breathe and feel
But inescapable

Hold out eight fingers
To trace the outline
Of my ribs
Fall on your side

The universe is
A mystery to you

But it’s far too small
For me
pluie d'été Feb 2016
and it was universal
the way we fell in love with feelings
and dark eyes


it was never supposed to be easy
but sometimes
when you smile against my lips
or trace my ribs
and i feel
your laugh
against the palm of my hand

it's the easiest thing
in the world
pluie d'été Jan 2016
How can one die
From sadness
When one is made from it?
pluie d'été Dec 2015
I do not believe in words
Running away
And painting a picture of
Yellow and Sunday smiles

I do not want to read the words
Defining a photograph
I feel that I must know
What they say already

I am looking everywhere
For the words that will save me '
With their silence
But I cannot bare to read
Any longer
pluie d'été Dec 2015
is only a dream

Time moves
So slowly

The mouse no longer
Runs up the clock
The mouse no longer leaps

Gazing across an expanse of white
(it's not the ceiling, my darling
it's the antarctic
upside down)

Breathing in time
with the wind

Why are your eyes hurting
If they are closed?
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