when people are in love
they often say
they simply fell
tripped over their own two feet
face forward
and into the arms of their beloved

i did more than simply fall
onto the ground of your love

you, for me
were an ocean
and i dived
headfirst
roughly
harshly
almost painfully
into the waters of “you”

i knew i could not swim
but i did so anyway
i was drowning
entangled in you
surrounded by this being of “you”
engulfed in this feeling of “you”

and i did not know what came over me
but i let myself drown
i did not try to swim back up
because if i went back to land,
releasing myself from your grasp
that would mean losing the feeling of “you”

and after
submerging into the depth
the love
the passion
of “you”

how could i ever leave?

I don’t want to
Open my mouth
Because I’m still afraid
The truth might come out
And if it does
If it really breaks free
You’ll see what I am
You’ll see the true me
The one I hide
With jokes and lies
I’m a terrible person
All jokes aside
You don’t seem to know it
You don’t seem to see
Even a glimpse of that person
That I know to be me
I’m such a good actress
I hide it so well
Cover it with a laugh
And you’ll never tell
You see depth in my eyes
You see love and emotion
But what would you see
If I ever did open
I can’t bear to find out
I can’t bear to show
The me you don’t see
The me that I know
If I let it out
If I let it be
I know for a fact
That you would hate me.

You say nobody loves you,
Who am I then? I love you.
You say you’re ugly and worthless,
That’s not true, you’re worth way more than this.
You say nobody gives a **** about you,
But how can you not see that I’m with you every step of the way, fighting with and for you.
You say that **** doesn’t deserve you,
And **** right you are.
He doesn’t.
You’re too good for him.
I know I just met you a couples weeks back,
But I’ve grown so fond of you.

like the very sound of her voice could save me
like i would give her my soul so she could be happy

like walking to the edge, heart pounding
like the step before the fall



heart hit first,

i shattered.

Pain is...
Being able to imagine a future with him
Someone who will never love you.

Pain is...
Loneliness
Sadness
Being overlooked
Wishing for the impossible
Seeing everyone run from you.

Pain is spirit breaking,
Tear jerking torment.

That's what pain is.

I smoke **** just like you.
Money gives me greed just like you.
******* makes me wonder just like you.
My parents kicked me out when i was 17 just like you.
I died inside when i turned 13 just like you.
I saw life for what it was a 7 just like you.
I want to die everyday just like you.
I think about killing myself just ljke you.
I don't like money just like you.
I love the moon just like you.
I love the idea of love just like you.
Most important im not alone, just like you.

i know i shouldn't
i mean i know i wouldn't
of course i wouldnt
why would i?

but
if i could tell you how you make me smile
when you laugh
or tell you how i love how you occupy your space
full but free, comforting but never caging
i would do just that
but i know better

and
i know you could never love me
but if i could tell you
just once
how beautiful you are
i think it would just be nice
that's it
that's all

I should not care this much for you
Because the feelings we share are wrong
I know I need to let you go
But I'm simply not that strong

I miss you more and more it seems
With every day that passes by
Each tear I cry a reminder I can't have you
No matter how hard I try