My greatest fear is being forgotten
lately I've had to face this fear
because I am nothing.

My greatest fear is being forgotten
and last Christmas,
my grandma forgot to get me anything.

My greatest fear is being forgotten
ironically I have forgotten all
of my self value.

My greatest fear is being forgotten,
it just so happens to be that every time
my family does something I seem to be not included.

I'm living in a world where everywhere I turn I am facing my fear, but instead of me getting over it, I'm getting worse. I spend late nights with a lot of thought that makes me face the fact that I have become the forgotten one.

it was late nights that we stayed up talking about stupid ****
the night was young
we were two sexually frustrated people
i was curious
and your eyes were wanting
what I  was willing to give
your words were slipping into me
and making me feel like I was the best thing
you told me you loved me
and that you would never leave
but you ended up leaving

-H.M.

dad
such a emotion filled word for me
I never had one
all he was to my family was a ***** donor
and definitely not a care giver
if he gave us anything
it was tramatic memories
up until 2 years ago,
I thought everything my dad did to me was my fault
and I just wanted to **** myself
because I couldn't live with my filthy self
he touched me in innopropriate ways and I let it happen
I let him into my bed because he said I seemed sad
he slid his hands up and down my legs
in a not so pure way
the next thing I knew he was sliding up my dress
he took my pure innocence
and shattered it in 10 seconds
I've been raised in a world where if you're not a ******, you're a *****
I never had a change to find out what a virginity was
but my dad took mine
and all I want now is someone to hold me
but I'm too *****
and nobody even wants me

"I'm busy," she says
"I have work to do,"
"If I want to see the moon I can find a good picture online."

When is a picture
ever a good substitute
unless the real thing
isn't there?

my eyes are tired and my face is red
I'm craving the feeling of tiredness in my body
but the thought of you makes me too happy to want to sleep
my brain is a race track
its never stopping
its keeping awake
so let me wait till the race is over.
but the race is just starting
and I think I may be awake for a while
my eyes are getting droopy and my mind is getting lost
I don't know how to feel or what to think but
I think I'm lost in the thought of you
dreamy eyes
beautiful face
great taste
I love race you cause my brain
so when you ask me why I'm tired in the morning, it's because I couldn't stop thinking about how beautiful you really are.

since the last time
I made ugly marks
on my beautiful skin

since I realized I was so much more
than trying to get the blood on my wrist to gush out of me

since I understood there are better ways to solving problems instead of slicing up my wrist

since I just knew that I wanted change for myself

now I use words to heal my sick mind when I'm feeling down

now I understand the healthy ways of getting rid of my sadness, instead of letting my sadness get rid of me

now I am a changed person just for me