I only became alive inside your minds eye,
caught between the landmines as we **** tried,
to break through the new unto the other side,
but under the seas I could only see the sapphire,
golden blue we knew the landslides didn’t land fine,
and punchlines soon turned into black eyes,
that blew up on the spot as we stand tired,
The lies told the truth until it transpired,
I never knew I could be burnt until I held fire.

All you wanted was my wifi code

Why try.
I could see the veins in your head ready to explode.
Always on the line,
Trying to find sweet circumstances left behind in text messages not fresh ink.
Always on my mind, through computerised images and jpegs -
I just wanted a bit of you to save for myself in memory.
The remedy for running out of time and space,
And as I let you into mine,
The first thing you asked me as you looked me dead in the eye after a hard drive home,
was, 'Nate can you tell me what's your wifi code'

i try not to write poetry with your name in mind
because maybe im afraid of getting optimistic
maybe hopeful is too much of a burden to carry around
and staying angry is more safe than
all of the colors i feel when i look you in the eyes
and believe me baby-
sorry-
believe me,
i avert your gaze with probable cause
its easier to hate you than to hate our odds
and the comfort i feel when you say my name
like a whisper
like a prayer
like a moment for me alone
its easier to keep this pessimistic mindset
because i think, even as a raincloud, i can admit
if i describe the way my hands shake
when you touch me
i will never be able to silence myself
its easier to keep all of this bottled up
and sent out to sea
with no recipient
than to reach across the table
and break the silent rules we never put into permanence
believe me,
it's easier to avert your gaze
than to confront my feelings
because you know how i feel about confrontation
i can sleep surrounded by white noise
and i'll still have said too much
because every time you slip up
i feel it in my chest
and maybe i can admit that i dream about the eye contact i avoid
without destroying the way we both hold our breath around eachother
i dream about you hating these urges the same way i do
i dream about you wanting me and your sacrilegious mindset
and maybe if i fall asleep sober enough
in that dream
i can find a way to reach across the table
and write optimistic poetry about
how it feels to break the rules

the rain reminds me of the lights you said you could see from your window at night
i distinctly remember thinking
this is all ill ever be
this is the best ill ever get

and everything is wrong
and everything I say is a lie
But i don't think ill live that long

i don't want to fight anymore
the orange light is reminding me that
ill never go home
and my feet are cold and sore

im tactful im resourceful
and ill shut my eyes when i need to

ive learned that the man in the moon
might be a bit tired of hearing my complaints
and the universe doesn't care about me
but it's no surprise really,
since it's got the whole **** universe to take care of

i was too busy relying on the things that bound me
it all made sense in my head
and none of it had a consequence
but superstitions only have as much power as you give them

i am learning to be the center of my own universe
and to live as loudly as possible
i think im on the right course.
my train of thought is clear and mellow
and there's no sign of derail

I could drown,
Within those eyes
A deeper blue,
Than all the skies.
For a single Kiss,
I'd tell a million lies

For a cold glance
Glacial blue.
There is no thing
I would not do

Contradicting hands
Which feel so warm.
For one handshake
I'd **** a swarm.

I was never yours
And you, never mine,
But for your presence
I'd give my mind.

I'd sell it,
I'd **** it,
I'd change.
Just so you,
Would feel the same.

My love,
You don't love me.
I'm not blind,
But I couldn't see.

When you said friends,
That's what you meant.
But I know, no effort
Was ever spent.

I paid the price,
Of my sanity.
Though I gained a love,
For all eternity.

So suffer I may,
And die I might.
But the law of love,
Only tells us what's right.

And that law tells me,
There will never be a we.
And accepting that,
Allows me to be free.

So move on I will
And for you
I will never ****

For we weren't,
Meant to be.
So I will move on,
Happy now, with just me.

i am better than no one
                                   no one is better than me.
i'll set the Earth on fire
then drown it.


in the sea....

I have neither:
The Time- to talk trash-

or

The Tolerance- to tell tales-

I don't mean to be spiteful,
but if you really want to bother me.                   Just read the title.