Take a drag
Look up
Feel the void
Hear the silence
What are we?
Matter?
What a silly word
Who decided what matters?
That ever present phrase
It matters it’s important
Because, because they said so

We are building New Babylon
out of carcasses and bones,
repeating the design flaws
of ancestors,
undoing our future,
sealing the destiny
for generations to come,
We are the very stones
built into these walls,
the same ones we throw
when we turn on our own.
And these stones
are what our hearts are made of.
Our thoughts are but paper
forgotten tomes, decaying pages.
Redundant and irrelevant
is what we have become.
Behold the great construction
of our ultimate destruction.

Grow up, they said
but even as I did
I lost some child like wonder

Now. All I could ever want
Is to grow back down.

perhaps you are out of town.
you don’t answer your calls.
the neighbors say you were seen reading Sartre.
there must be some mistake
the physics is all wrong.

was that you they dreamed?
even the clouds are confused.
this better not be the end of the book.

it’s time for lunch.
they’re serving spaghetti
again.

...thoughts and feelings are soulless soldiers
bleeding my blackness like ink
leading the cracks to the brim
And do they dip deep, indeed...
they come out the other side thinning
and thinning still
and thinning
and seething my fabric
as my quietness parallels the tempo of serration
the wanting of you:
to flow and embrace
my every erasure
with the renewal
the slow violent blossoming
flowing and growing
into our fragrance
Our one world

I LIKE TO SAY YOUR NAME

I like to say
your name

when you're
not here

turn you
into sound

conjure you out of
thin air

so that you appear
before me

dressed in sound
only

memory sketching in
the rest of you

as if sound
was just an outline

and love
colours you in

adding the voice last
so I can hear you say.

"Hello you..!"
and there you are

as present
as present

can be.

I like to say
your name

when you're
not there.

heart, a softened shard
thumping deeper than itself
I insert music in my ears
Picking things, living and inanimate,
snatching from all around me;
I put reality in my pocket,
kidnapping eyes
as I build my time-armor
to crunch the kilometers
so hard to swallow
feeding the cogs of routine
daily and hourly bits of myself