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the universe
expands and contracts
as
I breathe
in
and
out
11w
I hover between worlds
"I am a spiritual being having a human experience"
and not the other way around,
when I embrace that truth
each single moment shines with brilliance.
quote from teilhard de chardin, who was a theologian/ philosopher and Jesuit priest.
As I feel my mind romp
Ceaselessly into the past
I twitch to it's sight
And I know I'm scared
All my happy thoughts
Are interrupted by obscure memories
Dark, grey flashbacks
Reminding me that I'm chained
To a world of immense pain

Helpless and crushed
I seek a permanent solution
I attempt to find peace
In what the world offers me
Indirectly, I'm sitting upon
Invisible dough of deceit
Concealing it's strategy to defeat me
Reminding me that I'm chained
To a world of immense pain

The chains are visible now
A keyhole appears in clear view
The more I allow fear in my thoughts
The more the keyhole diminishes
So I give my first shot at faith
Believing first, forget seeing
The master key to save me
Reminding me that I'm free
From a world of immense pain

So I've drawn up my conclusion:
I choose believing over seeing
That my inner heart be wholly converted
Than my eyes merely convinced.
For everything I see tells me not to believe
And everything I believe tells me not to see
The two contradict each other
So what do I choose?
Faith over fears
I'd rather believe then give into my tears.
Umm. Your views?
Rammed into an ill fitting life
like a cheap suit,
bursting it's seams,
it's ripped open fabric falling to the floor,
like the tears that flow from my eye's.
So here I stand, naked,
no more clothes left on the rail,
no vestiture to hide my shame,
just the coitus interruptus,
as the day slips out of my soul.
sometimes all we have left is our own vulnerability.
Threatening to shut out all memories, my wounds threatening to open again..
When I was a young girl of ten, my heart was heavy, my skin was thin
I was born a regular child, never to know why i was wild....

Roaming here and there, feeling the fire as the torments roam....

Though it keeps me here and I pray that it burns, but i know not
to scream....it will **** me in the end ...

As I roam, not knowing where I go
I keep asking where have I really been???

Debbie Brooks 2015
(c) 10-13-2014
The text message went like this:

Was thinking...
I'm so happy I’m married to you.

Said she.

You my Dear made me what I am today.  
Thank you. I am one happy guy.

Said he.

It resides on the phone as evidence
Of our life for forty seven years.
It has been on my mind abundantly
Of our love through the good times and tears.

We have held each other together
When our pieces began falling apart.
You have been my rock My Dear
From the moment we did start.

Cannot tell you enough My Dear
I am so grateful you are mine.
And I am yours forever My Dear
I will never, never, ever whine.

It has been said before:
*Love is patient,
love is kind.
It does not envy,
it does not boast,
it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others,
it is not self-seeking,
it is not easily angered,
it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil
but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects,
always trusts,
always hopes,
always perseveres.
Love never fails.


This was worth a big hug.
A very big smile.
Some tears. (expected)
and much more.
I have been wanting
to do this a very long time.
 Jan 2015 Erenn's Collabs
Rassy
I think some smiles are mask
To hide
The pain underneath because
If you showed the pain
That's bruising your heart
And weighing down your mind
You'd simply fall apart
Maybe i should give up
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