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Lainrz Jan 2018
Does it feel good to be right about me?
You always thought I hadn’t changed
I bet it feels good to be right about me
You always had such little faith

11 days doesn’t seem that long
But, it **** sure did for me
I knew the day that I gave in
To how I used to be

Would be the day you finally called me
That day that I gave in
I was laying down across his chest
Wrapped in sheets and sin

The moment that I hung up
The silence killed my heart
I cried on the drive, and when I got home
I tore myself apart

I told you about what happened
You deserved the truth
There was silence on the line
Then your voice was small, and blue

“I gotta go,” you told me
And then you hung up the phone
I knew right then and there
I was meant to be alone.
Lainrz Oct 2017
It's 2:26 in the morning, and God, I miss you.
It's pathetic, really.
I look forward to seeing you, when I do, time passes slowly, but too quickly.
As you walk away, or I walk away (whatever), I already miss you.
Sometimes I hold my pillow like it's a person, and pretend it's you.
I think about falling asleep next to you a lot.
I felt so guilty that night, but now I don't really care.
All I know is that somewhere along the line, the universe created something where half of it went to you, and the other half went to me.
I'm in love with your crazy.
It almost makes me feel normal.
We're like a solar eclipse.
The darkness far outweighs the light, but somehow everyone still thinks it's beautiful.
I didn't kiss you enough tonight.
I never do.
The second you pull away, and there's space in between us again, I'm starving for your touch.
A lot of the time you preface your statements with, "Not trying to be weird."
I think that's funny every time because what follows that statement is almost always my thoughts exactly.
Whatever you do to me that you think is weird, or confusing, or whatever, I only have one request:

don't stop.

Lainrz Dec 2015
So tell me another beautiful lie
Tell me everything I want to hear
Won't you lay here by my side?
I want to **** away all my fear

Lainrz Dec 2015
I'm an alcoholic
drug addict
and this ****
doesn't have a thing on

  Dec 2015 Lainrz
You never used to inspire me to write.
When I met you, I wished so badly that my writer's block would disappear and I could compose a poem of all the feelings I had for you.
But you know what they say,
Be careful what you wish for.
Because now I can't stop.

Now, the thought of you is so inspiring that all I want to do is write and write and write and write and write and write and write.
Your gorgeous tan skin and bright blue-green eyes force my fingers on the keys to keep going, until my nails are broken and my fingertips are raw.

You never used to make me feel creative.
What happened?

I fell in love.
I dove into the lake of love, heart first,
not realizing that I would never escape it.
I didn't want to escape the canal boat floating down the river of devotion so smoothly.

I should've gotten out when I could.

Little did I know that a shark lingered in that river.
A Great White Shark, ready to lunge at my exposed heart, that rested on my sleeve.
Although what I realize now is,
Sharks only live in the ocean.
The stinging pain in my chest isn't an aquatic beast.
It's love itself,
Trying to rip my heart from my chest and tear it to pieces, before my very eyes.

The destructive force that tricked me into falling for its lies.
Its promises of joy and happiness,
devotion and fondness.
The infatuation and lust that love guaranteed was all a ploy.
A ploy to catch me in its web, waiting for the spider itself to eat me alive.

You never used to inspire me to write.
But now you're my muse.
I wish I was smarter than this.
I wish I didn't fall in love with your kind heart and your gentle soul.
But remember, be careful what you wish for.
Because maybe, if I hadn't wished in the first place,
My heart wouldn't be so heavy,
And my hands wouldn't be numb from writing endless insignificant love letters to you.
sorry if this was kinda graphic at points xD
  Dec 2015 Lainrz
Kelly Hogan
I've been keeping my hair short
Because you liked it long,
And I'm not strong enough
To relive the feeling I got
When you ran your hands through it.

So I'll continue to cut off
The ends that are dead
Because you are too
And it makes me feel closer to you
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