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 Nov 2014 My name is a lie
ink
I say hello
My nametag dangles from my lanyard
"Hello, my name is Liz
Pronouns are kye/kyr"
it says

They see the lanyard
and they laugh.
"Those aren't pronouns!"
they say
"She is messed up."

Shut up.

A 300lb woman
looks into the mirror
she sighs
remembering her peers' words
"You should lose weight."
"You're very overweight."
"Your obeseity is your fault."

A 75lb woman
looks into the mirror
Her anorexia laughs
remembering the 300lb woman she used to be
her peers then tell her
"You need to gain weight."

Shut up. Shut up.

The boy hides his face
Not giving the teacher eye contact
The teacher calls his name
His stomach flips upside-down
She called on him on purpose
he just knows it

In front of the class
expectant, judgemental eyes glaring
Instinct tells him to run
He looks at his notecards
All he sees is chickenscratch
The teacher hangs her head in disappointment
and growls
"Just sit down if you have nothing to say."

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

A girl drags hersef through the day
Everything is black and white
Coming home to wild parents
Who hit her constanty
and then claim
"I love you."

Excuses, excuses.
For every welt, mark and bruise
But when she gets one on her face-
She had given one, too.
In fact, she had given many
How generous she was!
The police came and arrest the girl.
All she heard was
"Her mother is dead."

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

Take a breath
the girl tells herself
She goes to her parents
They stare, wide-eyed
at her dress, eyeliner and nails
they just stare.

She tells them
her new identity
They tell her
"Chris. You aren't a girl.
You're a boy."

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

You read a poem
titled "Shut Up"
About the hardships
The unfair, the despair
of living life.

Please know
Opinions don't matter
If you are happy,
who cares what they think?
If they criticize you
Just smile
and say

Shut up.
You are valid.
Please do not let anyone tell you otherwise.

You'll be okay.
I used to be best friends
With this girl in my grade
We hung out after school
Almost every day
Until that day
When she met that girl
That one day
That seemed to change my whole world

She started to change
Faster than I expected
It was like her system
Was suddenly infected
Infected with some disease
That's yet to be named
But until then
I will call it Fame
Fame seems to infect everyone
Person by person
The victims can be anyone

The girl that I knew
Well I guess I didn't know her fully
Because she has become something horrible
She has become a bully

She pushes kids in the hall
And teases everyone

Even I have become a victim
Of her symptoms she feels everyday
Where she forgets that I was her friend
And shoves me and calls me names
She says she never liked me
It was just pretend
And that was the moment
I was pushed off the deep end

I walked right up
To her face and said
Words that she would dread

I told her
That we've all had enough
Of being someone
That she bullies and taunts
Just to have fun
She needs to get some help
Because her bullying time has expired
I think it's time that she retired
Because I know she's not like that
The real her is stuck
Screaming inside
But she has been ignoring her
And pushing her aside


Well she finally changed her image
And her bully days were gone
But the days when we were friends
Have been long gone
Because once you take a glass
And throw it to the floor
It breaks in many pieces
That can't be fixed anymore
Because that's the thing about trust
Once it's crumpled it won't be flat


But will this really happen
The future holds the answer to that
Our flag hanging high
In the morning sky
Showing red white and blue
Symbolizing freedom for me,
And freedom for you

Today we honor
The brave men
That have fought to protect our country
Again and again

We owe it to them
These heroes called soldiers
Who fought for our country
And stood strong like a boulder
To protect America
The land of the free
Home of our brave men and women
We honor today every veteran
When the dark velvet blanket drapes across the sky
And the stars shine bright in the night
We shut our eyes
Turn the lights off
And drift into sleep
So peaceful and soft

In our sleep
We dream of things
We long to have
We dream of happiness, love and hope
To ignore all of the bad

In the morning
When we wake
We may not know
What we dreamed before
But we are granted with a little hope
Another open door

For each morning offers a new chance
To fix our mistakes
And change what was wrong yesterday
With thoughts from our dreams
That we dreamed when we were away

Away from the world
That is hard to survive in
Hard to have courage
Hard to live and strive in

But our dreams
They tell us
Where to go
How to act
And how to grow

So the world is not so bad
It is only dark at night
For if you close your eyes
And open them real soon
It will soon be time for you to dream along with the moon
 Nov 2014 My name is a lie
Creep
I have lost all ability to
tell you how much I really do like you,
the way drone bees are attracted to queen bees,
and to tell you how I would
drown in depths of despair-

WAIT WAIT WAIT A MINUTE HERE THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG HERE. THIS JUST CAN'T BE ANOTHER SAPPY LOVE POEM, LIKE EVERY OTHER ONE WRITTEN BY LOVE-STRUCK TEENAGERS.

So here's my start over,
for the things that matter most,
even more than love, because in the end love will just **** you anyways.

Friends-
the rubber-bands in your life that will always come back to you no matter how hard you push them away.
the teddy bear who you can whisper secrets to at night, the one that you hug tight as you cry and cry and cry.
the sprinkles of sugar in my ******* up life
and basically the only thing keeping me alive and my **** together. :D thanx you guys ;)

Family-
like a flu shot- annoying as heck but usually good for you in the end.

AND LASTLY CAUSE I MUST PRAISE THIS (im sorry this doesnt concern you)

Manga/Anime-
for being written and keeping me company at the worst of times and guiding me. you are basically da bae, such a good friend -tear- i can always count on you.

AND THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING, ALL THE BAD THINGS AND GOOD THINGS IN THIS WORLD REGARDLESS yes even you
idk i cant write today or this week... not feeling it. :P so this is a bleh post cause i just cant write oops
BUT THANK YOU FOR THOSE OF YOU I MENTIONED
i write all day like an adult,
i am learned and i use big words
and i know how to accurately craft
a metaphor about pain and harm.

but at the end of the day
i return to childlike phrases,
“it’s not fair,” and i feel more
of a release from that than
a composition notebook
filled from cover to cover
with a million different ways
of saying that i still,
despite everything,
am not happy.
she was a poet,
and he was her pen.
in him,
she always found words to write,
songs to sing,
thoughts to think.

he'd smile,
and kiss her softly,
and say,
"write me a poem."

and she would.
she'd put poe,
and whitman,
and shakespeare to shame,
and she'd write a poem that made his eyes water.

she'd compare him
to a rose with no thorns,
a book with no end,
a world with no poverty --
the things we all wish for,
but can never attain.

//

he asked her one day,
"what am i?"
and so she picked up her pen,
and began the usual:
you are the shining sun after a hurricane,
with rays that open the eyes of the blind.

but he stopped her after those two lines,
and said that this time,
he didn't want any metaphors,
or similes,
or analogies.
he wanted the truth.

and so on that night,
as he slept,
the poet picked up her pen,
and she wrote.

she wrote,
then thought better of it,
then started over again,
and this cycle continued well into the early hours of the morning,
until suddenly,
she wrote, frantic,
if i can't love you for what you really are,
have i ever really loved you at all?


this, too,
she thought better of,
condemning it to the trash.

the next morning the poet was gone,
her final work a mere two words:

i'm sorry.

(a.m.)
this is more of a story than a poem but i like how it came out so leave thoughts & comments please
In the heat of welcome change
I gaze upon my patched up scar
And think it must be truly strange
How much I miss that one night's star

I dream of days spent in our creed
And seek the comfort of our shell
But find I've fallen out of need
And almost regret that all is well

You saw my trouble and made it kneel
It was a true magician's role
How good you made bad feel
It only took your beautiful dark soul

And in the midst of life's most grand roulette
I owe my fate a kiss
Never will I forget
The way we danced in the abyss
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