My dream feels so real.
Feels like I could just reach out and touch him.
I’m not sure what to think of it.
Do I really want it to happen.
Maybe I do,
But I don’t want things to get weird.
I love him but Im not sure if I should say it.
Friends with benefits is kinda interesting.
It’s also kinda weird too.
Am I just feeling this way cause he's the only guy I feel closest to?
Is it cause I find him attractive and he helps easily take the pain away?
Im not sure.
I need some serious help.
But time shall tell.
What it wants me to do.

Chilling
Talking to my best friend
We cuddle
And I kiss his cheek

Next thing I know
He's licking my neck
I slowly lick his in return
Blushing my head off

What the hell is going on here?
Am I talking to the same person?
But he is really attractive..
I bite my lip

This is some intense ****

~Devil~

Prom date?
Maybe

Dress?
Thinking bout it

Heels?
Will be kicked off as soon as the music starts

Hair?
Either curled or just in a ponytail

So much for me to think about
But im just hoping that amazing someone can come with me

IM OFFICIALLY A SENIOR!!!!!!!!!!!

cuddled
kissed

he bit my neck
i clawed his back

his tongue against mine
loving it

i nibble his ear
bite his neck
claw his back
hear him softly moan

i know i got him,
just where i want him

He has a surprise for me.
What is it gonna be?
He said its done.
When am I gonna get it?
When did he have the idea,
To do this?
I'm so excited,
But annoyed.
He won't tell me.
No matter how much,
I beg, pout, or kiss up.

Grrrr

I don't know what to feel anymore.
Life just seems like a waste here and there.
Seeing people happy around me
Seeing them break uncontrollably
What's the point in life anyway.?
We're born.
We live.
Then we die.
What's the point if you're pretty much already dead to begin with.?
Some of us are born with these unbelievely amazing talents.
The rest of us are just like a waste of space.
If I can sing....Then why do I feel like such an outsider.?
I'm right with the group of the loners.
The weak trying to act strong.
The dumb ***** trying to act smart.
But for what.?
I'm never gonna be good enough.
Not in this life time.
And probably not the next.
Or even the one after that.
Im not sure where all this is coming from.
And don't act like you're worried about me.
Don't act like you ever cared.
Im just someone in the shadows.
Im just that nobody people look past.
After everything i've seen.
It breaks my heart....
Oh wait..
What heart.?
Im a heartless *****.
I guess I'll always be that way.
Guess I'm a disrespectful and rude.
If so I apologize.
Not like you'd except that apology anyway...
I know you all have at least one thing against me.
And I don't blame you.
I could really care less if everyone hated me.
I mean...I should be use to it by now.
Everyone else is growing up and doing something with their lives.
I'm just the stupid lazy *** chick that thinks theres no point in life.
Thinks that she was suppose to die at the age of 15....
I don't know why Im even writing this considering no one will read it....
~Devil~

Talking to my besties
One says a friend called him a lollipop
I just laugh and ask
*"Can I lick you then?"

Cuddling in bed
Spooning
Your breath against my neck

You slide your hand down my side
Squeeze my hip
My eyes are closed slowly dosing off

You pull your boxers down
Rubbing your **** against my ***
My eyes open as a smile

You run your fingers up my body
Start playing with my *******
I bite my lip a lil

You start kissing and licking my neck deeply
I tilt my head back smiling ****
You pin me on the bed

Face down
You feel my ***
Spread my legs

Shove your **** in me
I moan softly
Going hard and fast

Oh my god!
You feel my ****
Spank my ***

While you make me wet
You pull my hair
Saying I'm a naughty girl

The future might look bright and sunny
Yet the past was dark and cloudy
The people today
Don’t know what to say

Some show hate
Others fear
I don’t know what to say
This might be the end my dear

I’m scared of loosing you
You’re my whole world
We may have our fights
But you’re worth the hurt

Through the years
Through the tears
Life will finally end

I’m only leaving
From this world
If we are hand in hand

Wanting to tell someone your secret
Not knowing what they will do or say
You keep it locked inside
Until you believe in yourself that its ok

ASHLEY BABY!
You make me feeel sooo alive
I've got purpose once again!
YEAH YEAH!

If looks could **** you'd be the one
That takes my world and makes me numb
I'm nothing, without you I can't breathe (I can't breathe)
And as the sunlight burns the sky
I see through my obsessive eyes
I'm nothing, without you I can't see

You're the strength I need to fight,
You're the reason I still try,
I'm the moth and you're the light,
Use these wings so I can fly

**** happens,
Hearts get broken,
Andlife moves on,
But no one cares,
Until your gone.

Crying,
Curled in a ball,
Not knowing what to do,
What to think.

Scared to lose you.

My heart is cracking,
breaking,
just thinking about,
not being yours.

you look at my and go, what the hell?
you see my face and go, what the hell?
you see my clothes, what the hell?

you see my scars, what the hell?
you see pain, what the hell?
you think I'm a freak, what the hell?

I say hi, you say *******, what the hell?
you pick on me, what the hell?
you see nothing in me, what the hell?

you think you're all this and that
you talk a lot of smack
you aint got crap

I say ***** please
you laugh in my face
the anger in my eyes, the anger deep inside

you got nothing on me
so go fly away
you haven't seen pain,
heard pain,
felt pain.

you think you know what im talking bout
you ain't gotta clue
you act blonde as can be
you seem stupider than me

I have my problems,
I have my pain,
got my doughts,
got damage

you should think before you speak,
you should ask before you judge,
try and help me out instead of kick me in the dust,
you keep trying to act all bad
ain't working for ya, is it?

You say your home.
You say your happy.

Do you even care?
Do you really miss me?

Did you really wanna leave?
Did you wanna leave me behind?

Why didn't you stay?
Why didn't you cry?

Am I not good enough?
Am I nothing to you?

Do you see the truth?
Do you see me breaking?

Just answer me....
Do you?