The difference between my consciousness and subconsciousness is so severe,
So severe I fear I must sever the tie between the two.
Two halves of a whole that is me.

One says, "Be happy! Why not?"
And the other says, "Be happy why? Not!"
I feel the weight of the disagreement and I can't wait for it to stop.

My left hand holds the cake,
As the blade in the right "accidentally" slices my left wrist instead.

This fight within myself has left me battle scarred,
But the battle scars on my wrists and thighs
Are no match for the scars on my heart.

Hiding within her own shadow
she creeps along grasping for the wall.
the chain tugs at her ankle in excruciating pain.
no longer in her own mind
she wanders...

Where am I ?  how did I get here ?
she escapes into an obsidian realm,
with which she can breathe.
hiding in the Beauty of a ghost,
disclosing reality to one alone...

Routine constitutes life,
shackled by love,
bound by a quill
losing her will...

Rising from the dark,
no longer to hide.
she is a beautiful thing
this rose will confide...

Life anew upon her broken parts
she now has reason
interjected reality
hope
a light...at the end of this tunnel we call life...

If you really knew me
Maybe you would finally see
All the pain I feel inside
I can't hide
The demons are under my eyes
They show me blood red skies
I'm filled with fear
They don't want me near
If you cared enough to know
Maybe I wouldn't have to go

Shallow words you spoke to me
When you said I love you
Empty promises you gave
When will you ever be true?

I always thought my life would be
So perfect by your side
But this life isn't what I want
So I'm leaving you tonight.

I'm Feeling
The want to disappear
I'm dealing
With the person in the mirror
I'm hurting
The pain is everywhere
I'm crying
Tears I cannot share
I'm lying
Curled up on the floor
I'm trying
But I don't want to anymore

Girl for sale: scars all over.

Nobody told me scars weren't washable.

Remember being happy? Yeah, me neither.

Called CPS again. No justice made.

Please stop staring at my arms!

You remember being friends? I do...

Do you love me? ...no reply...

My face is up here, stupid!

Tried writing poetry. Failed miserably.

Walking dog. Car. No more dog.

I was driving, and then I...

Where did I put my hope?

Still it hurts ..
When it gets cold and I'm crawling
On the bed all alone .

Still it hurts ..
When I go through your pictures cherishing
Your laughter and your madness .

Still it hurts ..
When I know the reality , yet I don't stop
My daydreaming of being with you
F-O-R-E-V-E-R .

Still it hurts ..
When I don't know why I can't move on
From your child-like grin !

Still it hurts ..
Because I know nobody can't replace you
And I will love you F-O-R-E-V-E-R !