I’m so tired of that just friends ****.
How far can we take this? When do we stop labeling our love as a friendship and call it what it is?

I’m so tired of these one night stands, rushing to put my clothes on after ***, leaving no trace of myself but the sent of our lust filled passion on your sheets.

I’m so tired of hiding in the shadows, being your late-night *******, saying “I’m just not ready for a relationship.” Yet your ready to spread my legs, and i let you because of the trance you put me in when i look in your eyes.

I’m so tired of being that girl.

I’m seeing signs on the road map that aren’t actually there, On the high way to hell I really don’t care.

As a kid your parents always tell you not to go in the deep end till you can swim.
But not mine, she threw me in, told me sink or swim.
Oh how I sank like a 90 pound rock.
Oh how I hit the bottom with bone breaking force.
Oh how I tried to scream but was welcomed with lungs full of water.
Oh how she turned her back, to busy to care.

I died that day, the thing that swam up was in fact not me, she began to welcome it with open arms...

Till she shoved it back down too,

You said we'd be forever, a love that'd go down in history.
But where it went wrong is a mystery.

Close your eyes drift into a peaceful dream state.
But wait it's not peaceful, it's a war zone.
Destruction surrounds you, can you feel the hate?
This isn't a dream.
This isn't a nightmare.
Welcome to reality.

Is there love in store for me?
Or will I always be just a fling?
Oh can it be?
Cuppid shooting arrows, hear him sing!

But alas its a lie.
The arrows are fates cruel messangers,
Delivering my tail of woe.
The tale stating I must walk this road alone.

"Where do you see yourself in 5 years?"

Now that's a trick question because I don't even see myself surviving till tomorrow.

Life, the pursuit of happiness.
Some will go insane trying to fine this "happiness".
They say its just a chemical in balance in your brain,
"Here pop some pills, tell yourself you're happy!"
But what if somewhere along the way we forgot what happy was.
How can we pursue something when we have no idea where to find it, how it feels, what it looks like.
Everyday we'll wake up and place a twinkle in our eyes, a 1000 watt smile on our faces so that those around us don't know.
So that even though the chemical imbalance is there,
And even though we don't know what it feels like, the others around us can go on finding their happienss , forgetting about any of our troubles.

Goodbye.
I know it's coming, call it woman's intuition.
I see it in your eyes like a sick, twisted vision.

Float through the milky way.
Watch a star die.
Ask for a love song from an alien.

Dance around Saturn on it's rings.
Rearrange the stars to spell your name.
Anything for you, My love could fill space.

Every cut, new and old.
Every drop of warm blood.
Every salty tear.
Every suicidal thought.
Everything traces itself back to you.

You, who beat me till I broke.
You, who ***** me to hear my screams.
You, who said "I love you" everyday.
You, who created the monster inside of me.

I thought I was cured.
I thought that life might be like Super Mario, you were the villain that shrunk me and all I had to do was find a super mushroom to make me big again.
But life is never like a video game.
My super mushroom tricked me, it only worked for so long.
Now everything triggers your memory and I feel so small.

Princess in your tower, won't you please come down?
I know your hiding, afraid of the world but I promise to protect you.

When your smile begins to fade,
Princess please remember me.
You are not alone on this treacherous road.
Down the country side we'll go
Leaving trails of marigolds.

If you ever forget me,
Please don't say its easy.
You are not alone on this treacherous road.
Back and forth we must go,
Living life solo.

The boy getting beat by his father will grow up strong, never backing down because he's had to fight his whole life anyways, right?

The girl being ***** by her step dad will grow up loving everyone and hating herself because everytime she looks in the mirror she sees him. But no one can know. So the mask goes on, right?

The 16 year old got pregnant but the daddy bailed, now she's gotta figure out how to care for a baby. She deals with all the stares cause she loves her and now she's just some *** not a regular person, right?

The single dad is raising his daughters as best he can. He knows nothing, just wishing their mom haven't died giving child birth. But now he's looking for help in another woman and suddenly he's incompetent, right?

But I guess what I'm trying to say is everything society as painted on us like big warning labels isn't always right. Right?

When you stopped touching me, did you think I would be needy for you?
When you said "its over" , did you think I would cry?
When you walked away, did you think I would crumble?
When you pushed past me with your new *****, did you think I would go crazy?

I did become needy, everyday wishing your ice cold glare would shoot my way just once.
I did cry, all night, wishing I would wake up and realise it was all just a dream.
I did crumble, I fell like a statue in an earth quake and you weren't there to piece me back together.
I did go crazy, but long before your *****... I went crazy the day I met you.

She used to yell when i stayed up for four days straight.
She used to cry when I'd come home late.
She used to scream every time i got high.
She used to ask about every cut i tried to hide.
She used to do a lot of things.
She, my mother, used to care...
Now she doesn't even have an ounce to spare.