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 May 2016
bones
There's beauty in words,
but often I find
more in the ones I have heard
than in mine;

more in the sound
of the ones I have read,
than those at the tip
of the tongue in my head..
 May 2016
Liam C Calhoun
The moon behind palm
Smiles, now,
Like the first time I’d met my
Second wife;

My second life,
My second shot at something,
And in seconds, like lightning,
Lost to dawn.

Ushered came the day that’d drag
When – The sun could burn,
The sun would burn;
The thirst, always there to remind.

So I’d wait on the lawn,
Under that same palm,
Smile; later,
To wed come dimpled stars.
In remembrance of nights under palm trees.
 May 2016
Amanda Kyara
I take two,
double the suggested dose
but as I look at the clock
and notice the time
I get tempted to take more.
For it’s 2:18 a.m.
And nothing else will help me
at this point
My demons won't let me rest
 May 2016
Liam C Calhoun
I’d only been seconds,
But my son’s brow beat
Years.

I’d nearly cry come one –
Memory, “good-bye,”
Another memory –

Abandon and face never
Remembered, only buried,
My father’s back

That very day he’d left.
I’d only been seconds,
And my son smiled

The dividend away;
Tomorrow’d be there,
The mirror would be too

And what I’d actually seen
Was my reflection, the one,
He’d never know.
My son thought I wouldn't come back; my father never did.
 May 2016
bones
Easy flow the waters
of the river passing by,

though we straighten them with walls
and narrow them in time,

and lace them up with bridges
to bind them where they lay,

still the waters, like a lifetime,
slip their bonds and pass away..
 May 2016
Sarah Mulqueen
At a ripe young age my imagination would take me to faraway lands, where I knew I was safe because you were there to guide me.
As I grew I became confused by decisions made for me,
I was upset because you were my Dad but were unable to be there for me.
Headstrong & stubborn with an attitude to boot, are just a couple of reasons we clashed.
Whirling & twirling down a chaotic self destructive path.
Too scared to scream.
Too tired to ask for help.
I wish I had listened to you.
As I grow now I remember the guidance you gave me, I cherish the moments of laughter & memories you made with me. I regret the years we missed amidst all the chaos.
Seeing passion & knowledge just flowing out of you.
Taking the time to know you, become your friend as well as your daughter.
I love you Dad with all my heart, I'm just sorry I didn't say it sooner xo.
 Apr 2016
Amanda Kyara
16
Your words leave me empty
as empty as the bottle
laying next to me
on the floor at
4:16 am
when I no longer had anything left.
16.
I was your 16th,
or 17th?
was i just a number to you?
or did you genuinely give
a care about me?

It’s hard to know what to believe

He loves me
he loves me not
popping a pill
for each time in which
I am in doubt

I end up downing the bottle
knowing that I may die from all the pills
but at least I killed all the pain.

4:16 am

I am contemplating my life
was it worth it to do this?
Is it worth it to live
In a life in which I am not fully loved
yet I give out all the love I have to offer
to those who are not worthy of it
I'm done
 Apr 2016
elena
when do you know he doesn't feel the same? you ask.

it's when you have to constantly apologise for having feelings for him and having confessed to him. 'sorry. sorry. sorry. for making things awkward. for making things feel like a burden.' like a fcking mantra.

while he doesn't reply at all.

does it break your heart? you were happy when you confessed to him, but when you realised he doesn't feel the same, your heart sinks, like how the anchor firmly goes deep down into the sea, heavy.

it's when, it should never have happened. you couldn't control your feelings. you wanted to express love to that piece of art you revere so much. you looked up to him.

people say love or feelings of like feels magical and all. but maybe not, maybe you thought too much about it just like how you overthink about every single thing. you mind fuzzes, images of clocks crazily ticking away, an alice-in-the-wonderland rabbit appears as well (it was something you were afraid of, that anxiousness)

like oh yeah, what did you expect from him, right? you just wanted to tell him how you feel.

just when we were gonna be friends, i ruined it.
and things just isn't meant to be i guess.
unintentionally fell for a guy. when i wasn't supposed to. wow.
 Apr 2016
Roberta Day
Have you heard about your hands,
how they’re the devil’s play things?
When entwined with my fingers
we cradle til numb, fine friction from
a twiddling thumb; graceful extremities
fondling every surface covering,
generating and extracting energies

With a hover they raise the dead
cells on my flesh and walk the sacred
space of nerve-endings with a trace
and trails of my racing heart
They’re smooth and soothe wounds
that can’t be spoke, knocking at
my teeth to wrestle my tongue
seducing me from the inside

Your hands are the tools
of your trade, skilled to persuade
and bade time--for it doesn’t exist
Unable to resist your palms upon me,
pockets of warmth radiating heat,
I relish in the sin of wanton skin
waiting to play with fire again
 Mar 2016
Sage
Sometimes. I envy the clouds. The ability to escape large crowds, where stagnant lines come from pained mouths, lines of songs yet unwritten to lines of pain and hatred. Lines that make others wish they were dead where they stand just so someone else can feel content with themselves. This disgusting creature of a society churns like a hungry machine, eating the ignorant teen and spewing out those with a mental illness. Allowing these people to play their bodies like violins and to play target practice with the roof of their mouths. So yeah, sometimes I do envy the clouds.
 Mar 2016
elena
it's a mysterious feeling, right? being in love.
you think about your other half everyday, how he's doing, how was his day, if he was happy or not. you wish you could give him everything you have.

on cloud nine.
you miss seeing his face even if it's just within 24 hours.
tell him sweet nothings.
be with him.
texting the whole day.
you feel euphoria all over your body, you want to feel this feeling forever, you wanna feel happy. just talking to him would suffice. go on simple dates. he added colours to my life. and i love seeing colors. i hated black and white in the form of photos.

but what if, it turns out that everything was a lie? you thought you were in love.
him telling you he liked you. calling you babe. telling you you'll always be his babe.

it's then that you come to a realisation that you've not met him before, it was just words and empty promises, you were trapped in your own illusion. your world instantly turned back into that dull, boring and grey life.

those words. maybe you made them up in you mind. you liked him too much to think rationally. you imagined joyful scenarios with him. your future with him. dates with him. everything just started to crumble down. you believed in everything he said. until now you realised not everything was true.

he can lie to you once, he'll do it again. being sad and crying so much because of him.  you don't even know if it's forced tears or if it's real anymore.

you have no idea what is real. you start screaming. grabbing your head on both sides. clenching you hair. sitting while hugging your knees. brawl your eyes out. you thought everything was real, or some part of it was real.

i know we're not meant to be. maybe everything was a lie. i hate you for doing this to me. i once wish you were dead and never appear in my life ever again. i'd rather you ***** up other girl's lives than mine.

you left. and i'm left stranded here. it's fine. i'm fine. i'll get over this somehow. erase all those memories of you, even though it hurts. i swear it hurts so much i wish i could let go of everything and just not believe in love anymore. i'll forget you. i'll do it forcefully if need be.

wish we never fcking existed in each other's lives.

so tell me, is love a choice or a feeling?
wished you'd read this so you know how much you put me through.
▪○●☆○●♡●○●♡◇♡●○●♡●○☆●○▪

A rare thing, my Mother's touch.
Though it was she I desired,
her babies I lovingly embraced.

Letting us make messes.
Be boisterous.
Expected independence.
“You do it, you learn it”
Helped us raise each other,
myself in the lead.

Our imaginary
world, rarely interrupted,
allowed us the freedom
to entertain ourselves.
Mom was not one to coddle,
but to patiently teach.
Cooking, gardening,
care giving.
To plant a tree,
and properly prune.
Create a thriving home
for salamanders.
Names of plants and trees.
Cloud formations.
how to patch up bloodied
knees and noses.

My Mother knew how to
transport a station wagon
filled to the brim with kids.
Provided us with masking
tape to square off our own
territory, creating safe
havens from point A to B.

She was fearless during
that overwhelming time.
Chaotic household of
youngins’ needs.
Teens tempers, mixed
with yearnings and desires
She taught us perseverance.
Eyes forward
No matter... calm or storm.

Her demeanor,
devoted and gentle.
Yet, fierce in determination.
An educated “No bones about it”
woman. A nurse.
Cute in a clean,
crisp natural way.
A woman of extraordinary
capabilities, rarely
comfortable with a compliment.

Not one to linger in a
moment of luxury.
To be soft and silly.
Or settle in for a deep cuddle.
The way she was raised
amongst her kin of many,
being the youngest.
from a different time.

Regardless of my perspective,
She loved enough to
make 5 children.
Provided food.
and kept us clean.
Encouraged the decoration of
our bedrooms to our
personal delight.
Allowed dogs and bunnies
to share our lives.
Insisted on the five food groups
at each evening's family meal.

These days, I cherish the hand
picked cards always mailed on
time for occasions and
holidays. ThankYou notes for
every kindness shown her way.
With her gardens beautifully
tended, herbs carefully harvested
and patiently dried, at Christmas
she labeled recycled spice bottles
collected from here and there.

Yesterday I gathered them,
Small glass vessels in hand.
My name and the date,
meticulously written by
her hand on white labels.
Over time, I have
saved them all.
Ingredients left intact.

My Mother's language of
love lined up in front of me,
these Little Bottles,
a culmination of the years.
Aromatic herbs
tenderly tucked inside.
I understood then,
I had been
Held in Mother's
arms all along...
I just never knew how to
fully accept her embrace.

▪○●☆○●♡●○●♡◇♡●○●♡●○☆●○▪

Copyright © 2016.
Christi Michaels.
All Rights Reserved
My Mother and Father are both 83.
It is our honor
to care for them now,
as they did for us then
 Mar 2016
Pixievic
Let me dance for you
For I am a dancer
Let me sing to you
For I am a song
Let me arouse you
For I am a lover
Let me sleep with you
For I am a dream
Let me soothe you
For I am a healer
Let me comfort you
For I am a smile
Let me protect you
For I am a shelter
Let me show you
I could be yours

Let me
Love you
Forever

(C) Pixievic
One from the archives!
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