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ever so gently.
in this room,
Not mine
filled with
morning light..

Though not seperated
by many miles,
I am
far away from
my home.

I keep telling myself
I can live there..
and I want to...

connections are deep and have been my focus..
Almost half of my years

Unconditional commitment
My life partner,
Once complete.
My love.. my precious one.
My dearest friend, my finest lover.

Created just for me.
Able to play my body
To a comfort unknown.

My Heart to rest
at last.

I dreamt of us
Left one man
Then two

To follow his scent
and found him.
Knew I would bear his daughters,

Knew without question ...
this Definition of Soul Mate

That once belonged to us.

I hurt by the
loss of you.
That you have
lost yourself.
That you can't seem to get away
from the depths
and nightmare
of your addiction.

I am hurting like a Mama Bear.
Lost my cub
and I can't find her.
I look endlessly.
Feel an avalanche  
of painful emptiness.

I am lost myself,
in losing you.

There are no
Monsters here...

this, the
soft, fertile soil,
that was
to feed the
Family Gardens.

No evil creatures, lurking behind
these timid
hurting hearts.

a painful place...
this invasive, pervasive,
of Us .

Here lay
The raw,
The ragged
mashed up
An onslaught
of hurts,
that float and fester
in our cauldron
of tears.

'Canvas of Colors'
tells Our story...
Melding together
The frozen and
unthawed moments of
all the

There are no Monsters here

We are the tender
beings that continue
to breathe ragged
after the forest fire,
tripping through
Crumbling Ashes
turned wet black.
Dank and slippery.

Yearning to find
strong footing
amongst these
ruins of our
own doing

No evil creatures, lurking behind
these timid
hurting hearts

There are no Monters here
Addiction uprootes and infects
The most loving of families
Surround Sound.
Big Bass Boom in my heart,
Brings home.
Self evident,
this hollow space
still waiting for your Love.

Years upon years
our cavern deepens.
Rough cut by rivers of tears.
Torrents actually.
They change nothing,
to quell fears and aloneness
Oh, the loneliness

This vantage has grown old.
Void of intimacy or tenderness.
No craggy wall to latch onto.
Retreat not an option,
nor a reachable rock in sight
to secure a safe escape.

Time to wave arms high!
Burn the SOS fire,
bright to the sky!
Let out a mighty Scream!

An empty echo
settles the truth.
Big Bass Boom in my Heart


Copyright © 2017.
Christi Michaels.
MoonFlower-Fluer de Luna
All Rights Reserved.
▪◇▪ ▪◇▪

her cough
is a song

her silence
is that of healing

i hope
i hope

she is here
near enough
for me to hear

the sighs
i welcome her sighs
tired bones

i send hugs
to the next room
blow sweet kisses

there will be
no acknowledgement
it matters not

her cough
is a song
to me


Copyright © 2017.
Christi Michaels.
MoonFlower-Fluer de Luna
All Rights Reserved.
There is space
between the moments.
No catch in my breath.
I harbor no fear this eve
of loved ones lost,
or unexpected anger.

The pups are content.
Tired from barking.
Fireworks, colors
blazed in the sky.
Bonfire set to coals,
to cool till morn.

I am calm tonight.
No quiver in my belly
anticipating a tremor.
A fresh breeze
finds me.
My thoughts
float on the cool dry air.

And so...
I am calm
and this is good.

Copyright © 2017.
Christi Michaels.
MoonFlower-Fluer de Luna
All Rights Reserved.
Tips of pine
Curves of birch curls
Against the crimson scarlet
slight of eve
I rest my eyes

Gently, I wipe the soft oak table
Cotton and lace draped
Fruit ń avocados
nestled in a bowl
A sweet for the morning

The day dissolves
My weary mind
My weary bones
My heart...weary

I turn from the world
Tuning into only the
simplest, base sounds
Hues of gentle reflection

The angst that
has gripped
too many moments
of too many hours
of too many days
Just now begins to ebb
Just now able
to breathe
at a gentle gait

Three down comforters and
feather pillows fluffed into a nest
My shoulders can rest
Lights down low,
I find my warmth
within this
divine softness

Shutting down...
The sounds,
the warmth
my breath
Let the dreams take me away

Copyright © 2017.
Christi Michaels.
All Rights Reserved.
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