In my desperate search for true love;
I lost myself.

They told me
to think more
positive thoughts
so I described the
movement from
a perfectly good day
to a severe depressive
low was as exhilarating
as being on an
out of control tire swing
attached to a tree that
was half dead
and they told me I needed
to take it more seriously
or leave.

I want to kiss your lips
until my whole mouth burns,
The kind of affection that would leave
me in pain and suffocating for air
as my lips weld shut,
Yet your breath is a small consequence
to pay for the moment with your touch.

I'm sure I could find ways
To yell this loud enough so it
Could consume every inch of space around you
Would my voice haunt you
Reminding you of how I defended your high honor?
Or would it take you back
To when my thumbs portrayed
The ugly side of a cold heart?
You could call,
Tell me how we were both wrong
Paint me a beautiful picture
Of how it could have been and
Every single thing that I will never know
I'd describe the way lights flash
Behind closed blinds in the dead of night
Because I no longer sleep unless
My eyes are heavy with exhaustion
Or sore from crying
How I do things to pass the time
To help you smile and make you feel better about your decision,
I'd cry when I say I'm sorry
And you might believe it this time
But you have to go
And it's too late
Because you have to go
And be good for someone else
And it's too late
Because you left the meaning to the promises back there
So you're sorry, you have to go.

the people you love
become ghosts inside
of you and like this
you keep them alive

I
hope
I
made the
short time
worthwhile

Even though
I
became
everything
that
You
despise