stuck in an abyss,
staring down into nothingness
as if it will shine a light,
when you least expect it
lost myself in a manner
it was hard to recover,
with the missing pieces
still at large
but can't give it up,
not yet
I have a long way to go
before I eventually blow
looking for some sunshine
after this punishing snow,
clear as a crystal
while my husky's fur bristle
getting a cup of coffee to go,
its high time for me to grow
more than I ever know,
I feel it is harder
to pull yourself
out of the funk
when you have been down and out,
there is that element of doubt
hindering your next move,
to get out of the abyss
and find yourself in a place
surrounded by love and hope
sometimes even your heart can't cope
simply because it ain't used to it,
but this time I shall submit
to a higher belief
that everything is gonna be alright
give my future self a chance,
a chance at redemption
to take responsibility
for myself
and those around me,
a chance to start over
fail
and rise again.

A new year a new me
The mantra of the masses
But people rarely ever change
Unless it really matters
So let’s have a real new year
Don’t set the silly goals
Just pledge to do the best you can
And keep a happy home

-

i hope we do not
(as a species)
"evolve"
into islands of
six foot radius circles
adrift upon oceans of
Social Media,

as Billionaires scoop up
space with the vacuum
of our losses

and then water ski across
surfaces of what once was
our own footsteps.

They Know—

we can not afford
to dog-paddle
our way across
their private
pool


by our wealth
                            alone...


s jones
2021

.

To all the times I held you
To all the times I cried
To all the times you hurt me
To all the times you lied
To all the times you screamed my name 
and the times I screamed yours back
To every bruise you gave me 
and for every bone you cracked.


To every name you called me
as your blows rained from above
To the corner that I cowered in
as you dealt out your "love"
To your friends that saw the battle scars and quickly turned away
To the drink that made you do it
even on your sober days.


I raise this glass to you my love
in thanks for all you've done
it took a while but now I see
that you're the damaged one
So when you're feeling lonely
Don't spare a thought for me
I cower there no longer
Your anger set me free.

My heart is not a toy
Not there to be abused  
Nor for you to destroy
My heart is not amused

We've settled on a plan       
If you say it will be
If you say we sure can  
That isn't a maybe
                              
My heart is not a toy
But living part within                    
My heart I redeploy
My patience grew too thin

Just try a nip and tuck
Maybe you'll have some luck
Maybe you'll ward off age
Come on its all the rage
A nip here a tuck there    
Get smaller underwear

Let yes be yes
Let no be no
Anything less
Would be a blow    

Decide on it
No letting go
Just do not quit
Let it be so