(Early Mornings)


It is 4:10 AM
Here i am, facing you...
Haven't showered...haven't brushed...haven't gurgled
Too early to look...but, i could not resist seeing
This person with disheveled hair
Eyes are not too willing to open
Avoiding the uncertainty surfacing...slowly but surely
Making itself known, this morning so early...
An empty shell, is what i could see
A looming nonentity...

No coffee yet, but, the eyes already speak
You don't answer, your looks are so bleak
That is how you tell me i am  stubborn
But i've been this way since birth...so torn
You tell me, i am just in denial
In front of you, it is like, i am on trial
But, i am just a mortal
Maybe we are both tired
How can we ever go back to being inspired?
Maybe you'd rather shatter into pieces...like i would,
I'd carefully gather your shards...would you gather mine, if you could?

Now, later, tonight, tomorrow...we always face each other
There are days, when i look at you, you make me smile, i feel better!
But, most times, i hate the reflections, they make me glare
And i so despise the thoughts that ensue...i counter your stare
..... I close my eyes, with a plea,
A blink could not erase, the images that i see..

I have never wanted separation
And yet, Fate brought me here, in isolation
You're my silent pal...my silent witness
You say nothing when i become senseless
I leave you in the morning
I come home from work in the evening
And i find you still here... on this wall
Welcoming me home...where i just sit, or stall
Faint jazzy sounds comfort me
A few hours rest...late at night...i sleep...i am free
Then, again, the alarm ruins the stillness of the moment
Robs the dawn of its precious silence
And i rise...to drown anew in despondency...in self pity,
Or is this lunacy?
All i see is gray...and black
Be it dawn...or dusk.

If  ever i surrender
I'd be swamped with the stark truth, the reflections you offer
...this can't be a facade,
...in front of you, it's just too bad

I am

U n m a s k e d...

....I am weak, powerless...i crawl
Over and over, i struggle not to fall,
Over and over, i  look at you... but, just the same..i fall.

         (January 22, 2015)


Sally

Copyright May 2015
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan

~~~<«»>~~~

a
spilt
second
where
the
spirit's
spark
meets
conciousnes­s
and
our
pens
scribe

eternity


soulsurvivor
(c) 7/9/2015

Like a candle, I wilt
In the darkness, I mope
Is this what they called guilt
If so, why there's no rope

It never crossed my mind
What are you thinking of
Cause I know I'm not blind
And surely not that tough

Along came apathy
Just killed my interest
Seems like serendipity
Left me hanging at rest

When hope's evanescing
Like grandpa's memory
I prayed for a blessing
Save my epitome

Seconds,hours,days,months abate
I'd chosen to move on
No need to complicate
Despair needs to be gone

All this came to an end
When I heard a laughter
My distress starts to mend
I seek hereon after

What I sought was beauty
Just simply breath taking
With respect, she's worthy
I knew she's my blessing

My heart told me something
That I'm ready to love
For me she's everything
Sent from God above

At last, the time came
We met each other
I got to know her name
And we got together

From thereon after
So blithe goes my heart
I do vow to love her
'Till death do us part

My heart is longing
Longing for something
Or someone
To fill this void in my life.

Someone who will love
All of me
Including the bad and ugly parts.

Someone who will take the time
To learn my secrets
What haunts me at night
Who will not run away when it gets tough.

Someone who will help me
Fight the demons inside
Who will stand next to me
And hold my hand.

My heart is longing
Longing for something
Or someone
To fill this void in my life.

I am here
Where are you??