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birdy May 2022
I'm crying for a girl who never existed.
One who failed but always persisted,
to try and figure out
what makes one woman.
these thoughts about gender felt like a shout,
but this 'girl' was still figuring it out.
Now this person mourns the loss,
of this gender that felt like an albatross.
birdy May 2022
If the world knew you,
maybe it wouldn't have
made you this way.
It would uncurse you,
free you from the facade of strength
release your emotions
the hate
the love
the tears.
Because true strength
true bravery
is to let loose the thoughts and feelings
that scare you most.
birdy May 2022
My body was art --- not to your taste,
you covered me in criticism.
Your words molding me like clay
until the mirror reflected a shell.

The child inside,
forever lost.
birdy May 2022
my life has started whirling
down a sink of self doubt
I question everything I love
because my perfect life
has started to crack
revealing all the aches
I had tried to cover
birdy May 2022
The love left abandoned
bruised and beat up
like the other items
that couldn't keep up
  May 2022 birdy
Jay M
Our love was like a rose
It blossomed over time
A beautiful yellow bloom
We took tender care of it
Watered it, checked the soil
Even pruned it when we
Knew it really needed it
But we kept getting cut
On the ever-sharp thorns
Hurting ourselves over and over again
Because our love was greater
Than the ****** scars

But like a rose
I discovered that it had wilted
You tried so hard to care for it
But you didn’t know how
Sometimes it was overwatered
Other times it was left bone dry
When it shook in the wind and cried
You didn’t know what to do
And frankly, neither did I

Day after day,
I cared for it tenderly
Watered it, checked the soil
And even did all of the pruning
Maybe it was far too much
Because you no longer knew how
But you tried anyway, I know
Still, it eventually wilted
And you didn’t even know

It wilted
It dried and became a shell
The thorns protecting what was left
So I gathered the petals with care
Some withered and I cried
But carefully still, I gathered them
The petals of the wilted rose
And put them in a jar of glass
Your name written on the inside
Of its blank white lid
So only I would know
Wilted, our love is wilted
Dried petals in a jar of glass
On a shelf collecting dust
But the memories live on,
Of course they still do
How could they not?
After all, you were
My first true love
My yellow rose.

- Jay M
May 10th, 2022
birdy May 2022
cigarette smoke couch
in an alley
street light flickering
pouring your heart out
sorry
but I can't love someone
who makes the world seem small
like you do
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