I.
I keep looking
I keep drawing
hanging onto memories
miserably
(they're slipping away)
The starless night scene
illuminated by city lights -
a small canvas
I keep at my bedside table.
A Christmas polaroid, a photo taken
by the tree
two years in a row.
The memory of home
it's slipping away.

II.
I keep looking,
keep staring
at the unfamiliar faces
i put up
miserably
trying to connect.
Pretty eyes,
pretty lips,
dimples and freckles cheeks -
I'll never be like them,
I'll never have them
Then what's the point?
to keep looking,
searching for memories
never made
never will.

III.
i don't like empty walls
ugly stains filling a void

is there anyone
to erase it? -
my dark stain -
cover it?
paint it?

nothing can cover the empty walls
nothing
but the memory
of me.

She sat in a dark corner;
Alone, nobody to hold her
as she wept and wept
and shadows around crept.
She was hopeless, faithless;
her mother left her young,
her father
        - rest his soul -
                             penniless.
She now wanders lost.

   But no more!
The demons will claim her -
She is worth the extra cost
of her untimely demise
she so does despise.
   It is alright
   She has found peace
Although her anxious heart
beats as fast as a flying dart,
Her mind is free of the storms
that raged in her very bones.

We were lying,
you and I, an eternity,
on the vast green grass of the fertile fields.
We were dreaming,
you and I, the realists,
of the wonderful world we didn’t want to explore;
of all the stars in all the skies we’d never see;
of all the love we’re missing out and all its heartbreaks.
We were crying,
you and I, the optimists,
for all the death that ever came upon the world;
for all the tears and screams of pain that filled children’s dreams.

We’ve been lying,
you and I, the eternal,
under blue skies for ever and ever.
These blue skies,
our shared grief and last hope of salvation.
For we've been lying
on the vast green grass of the fertile fields for
far too long.
For we’ve been searching for the same blue skies
far too wide.
But there is no other place like our blue skies
where we always meet in the end.