The rain pitter-patters the roof above, and I roll into your warm embrace.
The smell of coffee awakens my senses.
I'm all eyes, ears, and touch as your body molds to fit my own.
Your head nuzzled into my neck makes my brain go fuzzy, and reminds me of the cardigan you always wrapped me in when the cold would chill my bones.
The city is alive.
And we are free.
Free to roam, to wander, to shout to the heavens about the love we are experiencing.
Time and time again, lives fly by like chapters in a novel, and all we can do is sit and wonder.
Wonder and mumble "I love you's", over central park people watching, and night time cab rides to the bridge where we say we'll jump, but never do.
And so, I'll open up, and fill myself with your breath,
and your woodsy scent,
and I'll ponder and run over the words in my head.
Debating whether or not to tell you how much you've impacted my
mind
body
and soul.
You've infected my mind with your voice, and your fingers trace my spine, like the spine of your guitar.
And you'll play me until I'm sound asleep.
And in the morning... the song remains the same.

What fuels the fire behind your eyes?
Tell me what causes your lungs to rise and fall in time with your heartbeat.
Ramble on and on about what makes you tick, and what you enjoy about this life.
Tell me why you hold that cigarette to your lips knowing the things inside of it split every single atom of your being, and tell me, go on and tell me how you don't care.
Make me crave more.
Make me cling to every word that spills from your full lips that I catch myself constantly dreaming of, and I'll explain to you how you've infected my entire mind.
The way you tilt your head back when you laugh so hard at something that isn't even remotely funny.
Or, they way you hunch over the kitchen counter cutting onions, pretending the sting doesn't make your eyes lose tears, like how I'll lose you.
And so I'll hold on tightly, like a child clutching a blanket, onto you and your words,
And I'll remember the way your hands trail my spine,
And how you make every nerve in my body stand up and dance.
I'll remember the curve of your smirk, and the gap between your teeth that makes my stomach do backflips.
*I'll remember it all, even if you won't remember me.

Honey is the way your words drip into my soul, like water cascading from the heavens after a dark cloudy night.
It is your absolute coexistence with every bit of the world around you.
The way your hands crescendo against my body like the exhales of the sea, the white light glows and courses through your veins like electricity.
Yet you're never in a rush to live.
Instead, you beckon me back to bed, my skin sticks to yours in the heat caused by our bodies under rustled sheets, and I think I found home in the spaces between your fingers.
You hold my name between your lips like a lit cigarette between your teeth.
Nothing will ever feel as sweet as this.

You were bright wildflowers running through forest green fields,
showering the world in sunshine, and I was the rain.
I was dark nights filled with rolling thunder and electric energy, and you were peeking through the clouds with your sunbeams.
Lilac skies and shady trees, I decided that purple just wasn't my color.
But who could ever want a sunflower in a bush of roses?

You were bright early mornings with rubbed sleepy eyes, and coffee with sugar, while I was black.
Tasteless and bitter, your cheerful moods sent me spiraling, and I was grasping for the misery that always kept me company.
Your words were sweet, like sugar, and left a bad taste in my mouth, like a poison I downed to drive out the sound of your voice in my head.

You grew flowers inside my lungs, and although they are beautiful, I can't ******* breathe.

I'm gasping for air, air, the lone reminder that I am free.

I was dark hair and dark eyes, with a heart that was chained to my independence.

You were so bright, and I destroyed you in fear of losing another.

But this universe is vast, and this earth is small, and instead of exploding, I concaved.

You should have known better darling, *I'm just a black hole.

You were the most beautiful creature that God cast from heaven, and you presented yourself to the world with a cigarette between your teeth.
You tried and tried to tempt the temptress, but she beat you out.
You used your serpent tongue and spoke lies as beautiful as the watercolors that crowded my mind, and I believed you.
I leapt at the chance to come closer towards the end of my existence.

I ate your forbidden fruit.
I perished.
I lost it all.

But the Garden of Eden will never compare to the words you whispered upon my skin.

*You sweet Lucifer, you.

You look at me with a gleam in your eye, and everything goes black.
I'm hazed by memories of cloudy days smothered by rain, and talks of dying young.
You whisper sweet nothings in my ear and upon my skin when you think I am fast asleep, oblivious to your world, and time itself.
Please stay.
Stay, stay, and whisper, ramble, mumble your deepest regrets and fears until you are nothing more than a fragile pile of bones with a red rose draped upon your shoulders.
Wrap me up in your cardigan sleeves, and tell me how precious my life is, and where you would be had you not fallen across my shoes.
Keep me hoping for something more, when by tomorrow you'll be far gone.
Hold me closer until you can finally feel our bodies meshing together as one beneath cold sheets.
Wake me with your coffee breath and your voice haunting my ears as I get up and walk to my car, begging and pleading the radio to once more bless my ears with that song, which plays and makes me dig out that sliver of hope I still have that you're thinking of me.
You make me miss you.
I never understood heartache until you leapt up and ran as fast as you could for the hills, and not once did you look back.

you have the most striking blue eyes,
and a smile as wide as the ocean itself.
you have freckles, freckles everywhere.
many more than i can count on one hand,
that i connect not thinking while we are lying around.
you get embarrassed, when i catch you looking at me,
and turn a shade of auburn i only wish that i could do to my hair.
and your laugh, is as contagious as the chicken pox, you had when you were nine. and all that i can know for certain,
is that you are more than i can withhold from, and that i
am hopelessly drowning in your very being.

your kisses are
addictive,
and your scent is
intoxicating.
the space between our bodies is
magnetic,
and the way your grab my hair is
insane.
the way my breath
hitches,
when your lips come in contact,
with the small spot
beneath my ear.
time frozen, as
earth stands
still.
and all that matters,
is the 'i love you,'
that i'm begging for.
whisper it,
mumble it,
drown me in your small talk,
and hushed groans of pleasure.
love me, love me hard.

I am newly awakened eyes,
mountain moving strength.
I embody the fulfillment of being one,
because I am whole.
I am conscious, of everyone, everything.
The birds.
The trees swaying in the breeze.
The bees.
I am vibrations and energy,
radiating into every pore, every surface.
Breathing.
And though I have failed, and though I have faulted, I continuously move through the universe, connecting, gliding, unearthing, every heightened sense of my soul.
I am the earth.
The trees.
The sunbeams.
I contain stars, planets, from universes far far away.
Within my ribcage I hold life.
Bold, uprooting life.
Seeping through the emptiness that is my fragile bones, and into those who surround me.
I see, I am, I will, I have.

aching of fury
rustled covers, white hot tenderness
will you stay for long?
strip my mind
peacefully soak through
every piece of you.
hair pulling,
kisses like fallen snow.
you are so beautiful.
will you stay awhile?
restless mornings,
empty nights.
keep me company in my abyss.
love me till i love myself.
are you here to stay?
night time thoughts,
tinted touches beneath sun lit shadows.
eyes the shade of cool i wish i was.
forgive me,
i cannot bear to be without you.

Ruins.
Somewhat like a fallen temple, sheets thrown across carelessly and books scattering the floor.
Clutter a sign of genius, as you inhale your cigarette slowly killing your aching soul, hoping to maybe absorb some of the lit flame.
Traces of nights long and tiresome, coffee stains on ink splattered pages, blankets rustled from lovers left without a second word.
Empty, like the coffee *** that you refuse to clean more than once a week.
Bits and pieces of memories ****** down a pipe from the white wine that left your system this morning.
You look so beautiful when you sleep.
Years taken off with wrinkles and fine lines missing, full pink lips that explain everything i've ever needed to hear.
Candle wax left upon tables from hot baths that resulted in ***** of words that were better left unsaid.
Come closer.
Close enough that we are mingling carbon dioxide and oxygen, absorbing every ounce of life.
Love, soaking through my blood like the iron that is running through my thin veins.
Tied together with twisted heart strings, branched and torn, split and tried.
Ruins.

do you move through colors and shapes, and do you pass through entities unknown.
red, the color of blushing cheeks after flattery my body cannot control.
purple, the color of bruises painted sinfully upon skin, galaxies of broken vessels.
blue, the color of your eyes shaded by tie-dyed greens and yellows welcoming into the arms of your embrace.
black, the color of dark night skies spent silent among a lit herb.
pink, the color of full lips crowding visions of lust and love.
yellow, the color of sunbeams bursting through tree branches coming across your freckled cheeks.
rays of spectrum, shared glances and hope.
laughter and hushed voices through melodies of favorite bands.
overlooked conversations, and dimly lit rooms with stolen kisses and clothes shaven.
scents, as intoxicating as the peppermint melting my brain into pools of mush, due to the musk of your t-shirt hanging around my fragile bones.
whispers of good nights and murmurs of good mornings.
can this only be the beginning of such things?