instead of saying
do
instead of judging
help
instead of worrying
be
instead of hating
love
instead of hurting
heal
instead of taking
give
instead of crawling
FLY

sometimes i'm not even sad
i just lose all motivation
and then people think i'm
ignoring them and i guess
i am and in my head i'm like
"respond to them get up do
something anything stop just
staring at nothing" and the
entire rest of me is like "sit
back down it's easier to withdraw
yourself when you're completely
mentally detached"

They threw me from heaven
when the pearly white of my wings
Faded to ashen grey
and darkened further with my mind.

They say the white feathers mirror
an angel's purity and righteousness.
That my blacked feathers reflected
a rotting heart and malice in my mind.

But what righteousness is there
when one being decides
the everlasting fate of many?
What is right and what is wrong?

An angel with blackened feathers
is no longer welcome in paradise.
For once I understand,
There is no justice in faith.

The fallen shall remain fallen,
The disgraced angel shall not return,
But shall instead find the truth and
take comfort in knowledge no longer forbidden.

the color of her lipstick
the color of the alleyway
the color of his knuckles when she showed signs of struggle
the color of the pavement
the color of the ambulance light
the color of her maternity dress
the color of her baby's hair
the color of the roses they set beside her coffin

she saw red--
                        the color of Love.

Her body spoke of him.
His mind spoke of her.

Their hearts didn't speak to each other.

I went on a nature walk
with no idea,
no preparation,
only to take some pictures.

At a certain point
I got lost
with no phone
no one but me,
my thoughts,
and the layers of
cold sunken through.

I had no idea where I was,
only faith that I would get out
at some point
if I kept going.

I forgot everything
except this poem, my camera, and my next step.