i like
seeing you
happy

i really do;
it makes you
even more
beautiful

but i wish
it was me
instead
of him

who is
the reason
of your happiness

Tic toc
it’s half past eleven
I had a dream and thought;
I am in heaven.

Tic toc
heaven turned into hell
am I still dreaming?
I can’t tell

Tic toc
it’s an hour past midnight
I am wide awake
and wrapped in by the night

Tic toc
on the clock blinks a fat two
I have only one thing on my mind;
and that is you

Tic toc
now it’s already three
a devil on my shoulder tells me to overthink
and I agree

Tic toc
it’s nearly four
I am still not tired
and think some more

Tic toc
now the clock shows five
and god, how grateful I am
to be alive

Tic toc
my windows let through, the light of dawn
but my eyes close and show me darkness,
to which I am drawn

Tic toc
my alarm rings an hour later
I am exhausted because insomnia
struck again, this traitor

My hands
start to
sweat

My body
starts to
shake

My stomach
starts to
rotate

My heart
starts to
fight with
my head

As I am
overthinking
once again

i keep saying
that I don't love you anymore
but I still feel like before