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The lonely, hooded figure.
At the back of the room.
The one that went unnoticed
That darkness would consume.

The one that had no power.
Nobody even knew.
But silenced pain and desperation slowly spread and grew.

Long sleeved shirts and baggy pants
Worn only to conceal
The deepest cuts along each wrist
And scars that will never heal

Voices wether real or not
Softly sang to sleep
Telling lies and making wounds
That stung and etched too deep

Waking up and asking, why am I even here?
After all this turmoil the answer seemed so clear.

Pulling out some paper
And picking up a pen
Writing the words so fluently, dreaming of an end.

Folding it so neatly, creasing on the sides.
Then shakily reaching for the rope
To put the pain behind.

Standing on the wobbly chair
Which decides the fate
One last deep breath, and silently
Prays it's already too late.

A little girl comes skipping in, hoping for a hug
But finds big sister hanging there, swinging from above.
Seeing something is quite wrong, lets out a high pitched scream
Mom and Dad come running in, hoping it's just a dream.

Mother drops down to the floor, gripping the crying child.
Father quietly closes the door, tears running wild.

Mother carries the little girl off into her bed.
While father holds his daughter's corpse, stiff, pale and dead.

As the tears keep coming, flowing down his face.
A folded piece of paper, sits in its quiet place.

Unfolding the white strip, he slowly reads these lines
Over and over again, spinning through his mind.

I'm sorry this is how it ended, I couldn't bear it anymore.
I finished my short lived voyage, and I've washed up on the shore.
The seas got way too rocky, the storm I could not pass.
You see my lifeless body, is peaceful now at last.
This world was not my place, I don't belong here.
Once I pulled the rope over my head, my destiny was clear.
I'm happy now, more than I've ever been.
For the remainder of your Earthly lives, remember there's a time, we'll meet again.
Just a little sad story.
Are you a friend?
A wolf
Or
A ****** sucker?
Your aim my money,
Your happiness,
When you get me well off
You kiss me tight
When everything is right
You say honey
When in my wallet is money
You say hi
When you think I'm high
Just get to know
That my heart is No
More a joke!
My mind You choke
You always leave it bleeding
I now go weeding,
All the suckers
All the parasites
All the untrue friends
The cheats
And
The liars
Are up rooted
I am now new
I am genuine
Faithful to myself
I
Am
In need
Of a true
Self coexisting
And a mutual benefiting friendship!
Defined by true love,
Sacrifice
Devotion
Love unconditional
And
Development!
Who,who can still lead a tiresome life?
For my case,enough is enough
 Jan 2015 Astrid Ember
little one
My teeth are going to break,
I'm convinced,
under the pressure caused by the clenching of my jaw.
I am wearing a plastic smile,
crafted of constant strain,
deep disdain,
and fragments of a broken heart.
 Jan 2015 Astrid Ember
Lap
unlucky
 Jan 2015 Astrid Ember
Lap
think of me often
my hands, bones, body: shaking
I am not dust yet
Back in the tiny town of Hamm
In a province best unknown,
Is an ancient sandstone prison tower
Where the grounds are overgrown.
The locals still in the town are few
Were wary of us at first,
But ventured out when they heard me shout
To tell me the tower was cursed.

‘Don’t venture there if you fear despair,’
They said in a foreign tongue,
Then slunk back, each to his rundown lair,
But we were too smart, and young.
‘They’re peasants, what would they know,’ said Kym,
‘They’re superstitious and fools,
We’ll test their funny old tower now.’
We should have played by their rules.

It was built in a grim and Gothic style
But had sadly been run down,
Hundreds of years of standing there
Put a torpor over the town.
The rusty railings, falling apart
Had never been breached by them,
The peasants whispered and looked away
In the manner of Holy men.

We made our way through the bushes, sedge
And weeds that grew in the grounds,
But then up close to the building saw
Some features that astound.
The walls had flying buttresses,
A door with a pointed arch,
And a gargoyle leering from above
Next to soldiers on the march.

We didn’t go in the first time there
But wandered around the site,
It was Kym who had the bright idea
We should go and explore by night.
I wish that we’d known its history
For that might have broken its spell,
I wouldn’t have sought its mystery,
And Kym would still be well.

We noticed an old Teutonic sign
Engraved, and above the door,
We couldn’t translate it at the time
It should have been done before;
Before we entered that cursèd place
And risking our sanity,
For I came out with a twisted face
Though Kym was worse than me.

The moon was casting a yellow glow
As we stood before that door,
Directly under the gargoyle that
Let out a fearful roar,
Then a stream of ectoplasm flowed
From its jaws, and down on Kym,
Covered her in this bluish light
And then, it dragged her in.

I followed, not that I had a choice
I was quite beyond control,
My legs did whatever they wanted to,
I had no choice at all.
Inside was a vaulted ceiling over
An old and blood-stained block,
And Kym was struggling, screaming,
As she was stretched across its top.

She glowed and glowed in this bluish light
Her neck was placed on the block,
And then a shimmering man appeared
I think I went into shock.
He held a shining scimitar sword
And he raised it up to strike,
And still I live that terrible scene,
Each and every night.

I saw it clearly pass right through
The base of Kym’s long neck,
And watched as this bluish head fell off
Went rolling along the deck.
But her head was there, was still in place
As I dragged her screaming out,
It was then I noticed my twisted face
That I can do nothing about.

They say that it’s called Bell’s Palsy, that
I must have suffered a shock,
The right hand side of my face is numb,
My eye and my mouth have dropped,
But Kym just utters the weirdest moans
As if blood was starved from her brain,
Her eyes astare at the horror there
I think she must be insane.

The last I saw of that evil tower
The gargoyle seemed to grin,
As if to say there is hell to pay
For those who might come right in.
And the screed engraved above the door
The letters were filled with lead,
‘You’ve come to the Tower of Grimm von Gore,
Enter, and lose your head!’

David Lewis Paget
 Jan 2015 Astrid Ember
Lap
i let all things pass
i am impervious to conflict
it rolls off my back and into a bucket of
disregarded worries
it's effective
for now
i feel one day this old wooden bucket
shaking under the weight
will give in
my worries will break the great dam
what has been keeping me together
that water will tear through my seams
that water will run down my fingers
that water will flow in my hair
that water will not be in my eyes
for this bucket: the worry bucket
has taught me
that everything can pass
there is no need to yell at the clouds
for raining on your freshly washed car
i've learned
head back, eyes closed
(that's what my mother told me
when she was bathing me as a kid)
so that rain will never reach my eyes
 Jan 2015 Astrid Ember
little one
my heart aches.
your smile strikes me,
and suddenly my chest is made of fine china,
and i break.
i see stars.
your blue eyes singe constellations into my head.
all at once the heat blazes,
like a thousand suns to my cheeks,
and i burn.
this love can only be described as a crime scene,
i am not the one with the finger on the trigger.
numb to any second thought,
you fire,
and I bleed.
 Jan 2015 Astrid Ember
ryn
.
A poet's heart isn't like any other...
It's the tears that trickle with radiance through words.
     It's a treasure trove that hides but longs to
     be found.
          It's a book shelved high that wants to
          be read.
               It's the freest of all birds caged but
               unbound...

A poet's heart isn't like any other...
It doesn't beat to the capable strokes of the artist.
     It doesn't pump in the most vibrant of
     colours.
          It doesn't wield a paintbrush to
          translate its thoughts.
               But it can see through the eyes of
               painters...

A poet's heart isn't like any other...
It doesn't conform to the conventional parameters of lyrics.
     It doesn't bind itself to the requirements
     of musical harmony.
          It doesn't follow the conventions of
          genres.
               But it sings its voice loud without
               restrictions of melody...

A poet's heart isn't like any other...
It's an open secret, that whispers in metaphoric codes.
     It's an exploding universe, that merges
     back into galaxies.
          It's a sought after painting, that boasts
          of unfathomable beauty.
               It's an everlasting song, that echoes
               within the poet that embodies...
.
Dedicated to all of you...

If you're reading this...
This is for you...
.
and he's only serving 283 months
For ****** one girl they know of
Five truthfully
And more than once for all
Sodomizing at least four
Over twenty truth fully
and he's not getting charged
For breaking my heart
He said he would marry me
He said he would carry me when I fell
He said I wall the bell of the ball
But now he wasnt here to see me fall
And he will never carry me
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