hold me.
i'll hold you too.
we can sit down and just talk,
about everything.
all the things that's bothering us and all the things we want to do or couldn't.
lets paint the future and make sure we're Both there to see it.

my words
they can't escape through my sobs
i've tried to tell you countless times
but they are trapped in my throat
trying to make their way out through my gasps of air
im choking on all the things i want to say to you

God's foxholes,
pick your poison,
burn burn burn, and
snare, flesh out an idea
and let it take hold. grit
your teeth, strip the bark
or just strip instead.
cherry, rabid, dragonflies
and headlight eyes.
this dream running us
ragged, this glittering
copper and boil before
you burst.

There is a piece of your skin that refuses to burn.
I keep sinking my teeth into it.

The thought that you
Would harm me so
Had never crossed my mind
For I was utterly obsessed

Secrets
Smiles
Safety
Revolved around you
Oh how I craved it all

But still, I fell
And you caught me
With love growing less
My pain growing worse

Soon my eyes were opened
Blind no longer
To my actions
So I waited for your return

The words which followed
I did not fear
You loved me, you loved me
Right?

Leaving for uncertainty
All reasons stayed valid to me
My hope still stood
Just for you

But there was a single sentence
Not another girl
Not turmoil between parents
Not collapsing grades

You simply wanted to leave
"Difficult and unstable," you spat at me
My dearest friend
Whom I fell in love with

He
left
me
suffering

My insides churned
Words flew onto the screen
I cursed him
Wept until breath refused to flow

The last words I received
From my future, my place of joy
****
You

i dont want to admit this
every time it gets late my thoughts come back
its a comfort thing
but then it becomes a bad thing
i swallow
and i swallow
and then i cry
and i cry
i try not to consume
but it gets late and i feel lost
and i don't want to talk about it
i always feel so empty
i try to fill the space
but its getting to the point
where i want to empty it
i want nothing

the sea looked so endless.
i woke up seeing blue hues.
it was early and quiet,
these moments made me feel like the entire world was asleep,
even the earth herself.