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Feeling trapped in my head so many make me think k onto over thinking.
I like my job but over being bounced around. I'd like to focus on what I love which is writing and jujitsu so many time conflicts and restrains that make me think and wonder.
I write all the time some tell me I'm good, while others criticize ripping me a new one. Some people like to get in your head ruin your inner peace because they are not happy with themselves. I'm one to help and encourage others, I use to want and help others; I'd rather be alone found comfort in my own company.
Took time out to figure it out, things don't feel right others try to contaminate your good vibes
Sometimes I want to write and post other times; I just save them, why write if you can't share.
I don't know sometimes, things pile up in my head. Writing is the only way to get it out, also podcasting, I love express myself that's why people get mad at me because I tell the truth lieing takes up too much, time and energy. I prefer to be straight up. Been a while trying to get back at it
Lay down this night
Try not to fight
Night terrors shepherd a blighted terror insight

Get through this flashing fright and wake up with another mental lashing akin to febral crashing

Every kid's born with a light
And as kid the dreams gripped mine tight

Eye lids fall to sleep
Fadeing into shades blacker than black
Seamlessly brought back
Seeing the dark move, coming closer to kiss my cheek
Choking on fear I couldn't get out a peep
Eye lids peeled and tacked on the tourtures rack

Afraid to see my family die I'd cover my face with invisible hands
So much hell inside my brain
I'm forced to watch as my sister's would fall and smear wherever it lands

How can a kid see so much when he sleeps?

Waking up afraid I would go to school unaware it was real life
Feeling dissolved, broken, school was like chopping at a tree with a dull knife

Live my day and proceed to lay my head down
Pillows and blankets comfort but cannot support the torture when my heads bound
Tears in the eyes knowing the nightmares are always around
knowing I'm not crazy as I feel voices with no sound

At some point I accepted this is how I am

Night after night, horrid beings and terrible stories unfolded like the buckled spine that's scraped into a body bag after singing forty storeys to the ground
©anthonyasylum
 Sep 2018 Just Rachel
Anya
There is a fundamental difference
between the peacock and the butterfly
Both are beautiful
Both are deserving
But when it comes down to it
One struts proudly
while the other...
quietly flutters away
 Jun 2018 Just Rachel
nivek
(JC)
 Jun 2018 Just Rachel
nivek
use your gift(s)

everything is given

freely you received

- freely give.(JC)
38
when he doesn't remember
when he doesn't text or call
when he doesn't think of me
when he doesn't think at all

when he doesn't miss me
when he doesn't let me know
when he doesn't say how he feels
I fear he's letting go
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