why is it that i promote body-positivity for others
but
i hate looking at my own naked body.

why is it that i say everyone's beautiful
but
i want to cry every time i look at my own reflection.

I wish to be the ocean
Sparkling under the night sky late July

I wish to be those moments in which we were
Innocent

I wish to be the words you sung at the top of your lungs
Before they told you
You ******

I wish to be the smile on my mothers face
When I proved all my teachers wrong

I wish to be the rainy days
When we played outside, and couldn't care less for mud

I wish to be the light in my brothers eyes
when he smiled for the first time

I wish to be the tree we used to climb
thinking we could reach the top of the world

I wish to be me
before the drugs.

As I stare into the starlit sky
I wonder if i'll catch this guy?
Does Jupiter hide behind it's moons?
Do specters and goblins dance it's tunes?

Will Velma ever sing my song?
My heart for her will ever long!

Daphne, don't laugh at me!
Can't you see that what's happening,
is beautiful and sacred,
I wish you were naked
in my Mystery Van, half bake-ed

The time is drawing closer, what seems to have felt like a lifetime , was a little over two years.
Although our lives were changed on August 1, 2012, when your accident took the life of your best  friend.
They sentenced you to 30 months of prison 5 years of  probation,   one mistake during this time 15 more years to spend .
So many things have changed in such little time since you've been behind that fence of barbed wire which is soon to end.
I am so ready for you to be free from those bars and become whatever your heart desires.
All I ask of you son, when I pick you up, before you take your first  step into freedom, leave the prison mantality behind that fence and never look back.  Take with you only what you need and that your freedom requires.
From that moment on every decision and choice you make will pave the road for your life and freedom.
Remember the ones that carried you and anyone one else you don't need them ,
Please believe me son they don't have your best interest at heart and never truly do.
My excitement and fear are about the same I'm worried sick over you
If I could make you step outside the box maybe then you would see.
There's not but one that's rode with you and will always guide you right and son that one person is me.