I saw a seagull today with a broken wing.
He was walking down Bleecker Street.
I never saw a bird move so fast on his feet.
He was really haulin’ ***.
I smiled to myself.
And I swear he looked right at me and smiled back.
It made me realize
Sometimes, you just have to make the best
out of what you’ve got.

Will Rogers used to say he never met a man he didn’t like.
I admire people like him.
But I’m not one of them.
I meet people I don’t like every day.
It just happens.

Little Grudges, my friend Sal used to say.
“You have a lot of little grudges.”

My neighbor for example,  banging the trash can lids
Outside my window
Two in the morning
Not that it woke me up
But I get up to look
Peek down there
Naturally nosey person that I am
And he’s pushing pushing
What in hell is he pushing at that hour?

So, Will Rogers I am not.
I probably wouldn’t have liked him either.

The Captain once told me
You can have freedom of the mind
But sometimes it costs you “freedom of the body.”

I did not quite get it at first. Then I realized,
When you want true freedom of the mind
And to do all those things you want
Either you trade your health or your liberty.
Or worse yet, you trade your mind in your search for its freedom.

Once in a while you get away with things.
I got away with a lot.
But not all of it.
There were definite costs.
Imposed on me by those who are themselves trapped by
their own stuff
So they resent freedom in others when they see it.

The chains of guilt weigh heaviest of all
On the mind that thinks it’s just a body,
I knew better.
I wouldn’t tap out.

I used to not understand why people got so upset over breakups.
I mean, there are 6 billion people on earth.
There’s bound to be another one that fits the bill.

Then it happens.
You like someone.
And they chase you.
Get you into something you never planned.
You decide to give it a shot.
You take a gamble.
Then , Boom!  they’re gone.

That stuff hurts.
Often, pain comes from emotions we don’t understand.
Things which don’t make sense.
Our body deals with it somewhere in the stomach.
Gut feelings.

Me, I am a gambler.
You have to take shots in life.
Sometimes they work out.
Other times, they don’t.
But if you never push in all your chips
You don’t have a chance at winning the ***.

Not this time.
Maybe next time.

We used to play cards on Tuesday nights
in the small office of a used car lot.
I would look at the old beaters as they came in.
Wonder what their stories were.
Who drove them.
Where they had travelled and what they had seen.
“All rust and dust” my friend used to say.
As they age their value goes down.
Which is what some folks think about people.
But really, the opposite is true.
My friend would ask
why I played cards
with those old geezers.
He didn’t get it.
Many people don’t.
I just told him I always win.
It was true.
Not in terms of money.
But in everything else I got from those guys.
Stories
Wisdom
Laughs.
One old guy used to cheat like a *******.
I let him get away with it.
I hope when I get old
somebody cuts me some slack.

When I was a kid, the thought of growing up
gave me a weird sickening stomach feeling.
I am grown up now.
But often don’t believe it
           (Until I see the fine lines around my eyes).

When you are a kid
You can meet another kid
And just play and have fun.

In theory it should be the same for adults.
But the games we play are often so complicated
That neither party can agree upon or even understand
                 All the rules.

I have been told it is not good to live in the past.
Who are the people who make up these rules?
Everything, including the past, has its place in life.

What I liked about childhood was its simplicity.
Just live and play.
Avoid the rest of the stuff.
Try to win when you can.

Certain people in life leave strong impressions on us,
By their sayings we agree with or positions we abhor.
When these people are no longer around,
their marks make themselves known  in various ways.

You are in my thoughts often.
You were quite the square peg.
I think back to the odd ways you did things.
A True Rebel.
But not a rebel just for the sake of it
Nor in order to receive the attention society pays to such people
A rebel because you make up your own mind on things.

"Never be afraid to change your mind," you used to say.
That stuck with me.
So although you are not here with me,
You are never truly gone.

For a while you said I was the one for you.
                       But You Took Your Own Advice
                       And Changed Your Mind
And in the now, I am ok with that.