To dwell on the destination is to miss out on the journey. Leave the future for the promise of tomorrow and the shapeless visions it holds.

Smelling on the wind, firewood.
the heat travels a warm bath around me.
when I set out in the morning/
the wind smells/
cool earth warming, slightly dried.
sometimes salt, I love to drink this.
Nothing to be
but observer/
bathing morning light
is playing now
laying low on banana leaves
got not shame
holds no lust
is pure
transitional beauty /
trust.

That's just the flows , flow
speking to souls?

or am i just writing to myself
out there in the web , i see

people seeing me

and saying nothing

...


yet knowing more than they probably would if they hadn't seen this...

wHO are you?

Reading this... perhaps you are a person ; who loves fruit juice for lunch and shiny golden shoes. Maybe not.
I wouldn't know
but you see me..
i marvel at that ability we have now...

Technological.



or maybe.
you are more like the lightning with thunder happening somewhere.

there is always a thunderstorm somewhere.

tear apart the seams

it’s ok.

i, don’t wanna talk about it.

even looking at the writing i wrote about you makes me feel slightly nauseous , it ...it’s not that i didn’t love you but....

well perhaps it was my fault ,

i don’t know

i don’t know

i thought i loved you. Ok.

and how is it? that one moment i can feel the whole world for you and the next....
it's lightning struck tree all over again.


Do not get me wrong , you inspired me to write and to breathe , you showed me loving myself wasn’t that hard and yet , yet .... you...broke my heart just like aunty said.

you broke it good and well that i didn’t even realize until i was out from under your spell...
  
                                                                  * ~ * ~ * ~

Open my heartspace ,
you were golden in my eyes ~

heavy sits the stone in my chest , cracking as i walk, dropping bits of crystal on the floor, turning to molten liquid scorching the floor with unsaid words and dispelled feelings to seep into
the ocean of bliss

burning the waters to desert residues
in the blink of 3 eyes ,

i saw in you - the flash of brilliance that i know is holy. The kind that could rule the world if, you dared.

But you were too scared ,

i want to explore this world , step out of my comfort zone , feel like i add to the mass of human potential -
not accept my consumer status because it’s simpler ,
i don’t care about public image , i despise whittling myself down for some pre-conceived notion of etiquette, and i can’t stand people seeing they have the power and not taking it.

You are a reason and you have a purpose, we are only here for a short time , this is our chance at something great and i want to share it with you.

I wanted to help you , and maybe that was my mistake.
To make you see yourself through me ,
that you were golden in my eyes
and should think yourself no less.

So i let you in to the secret place , my choice , i don’t regret it, not one bit.
I guess you made me a woman  so to speak. But i don’t think you are any more of a man.

You were a 26 year old boy.

Nor were you anymore of a lover who was soft and fair ,
but you twirled my hair, turned my lips to ashes , sashayed across my hips, tore holes in my skin with your teeth , sneaked kisses on my inner thighs , you danced with my imagination and petted my ego...oh so gently.

I saw a newer version of myself through you ,
and maybe , i just like being adored,
but i would have given everything back. I’m all for fairness
and in some twisted way i hope i hurt you as much as you hurt me, just so you know how it feels, but somehow i think , it was me who ended up with the short straw on this one.

I’m sure there are gaps in your fingers you don’t understand, let alone loving someone, but i hope you get this , your lesson was : Love freely.

And you know , if that makes me stronger and more flexible and if it means that i can bounce back faster , then so be it. I will learn my lessons in time , because i’m shooting for the stars and i intend to be amongst the nebulas that shimmer so well.

And i intend to love with that ferocity again and even more , because i won’t give you that.


Not after i ******* my being in ribbons for you. No. I won’t and i can’t.
I’m worth so much more.
So these tear filled words are as much for me as for you , that i hope one day , someone comes along who can give you what you need to make you happy.



Because i’m *pretty sure i’ve already found mine.

In the specific
pacific there is a hubbub
around the boat
it was a palava!
the foolish fiend
ate Pavlov on the **** deck.

THE END

Fear of the dark, a somewhat childlike fear, lead me to an electric shock, which lead me to break my vow of silence, which lead me learn what happiness really is.

Being happy is not fake sunshine advert sitcom glory
It is
Being able to take the gory and daunting turn of events that is
Making a mistake.

Talking it through
Or shouting it through, hissing it through
But
Above all
Letting it pass through -

Listening to another when emotions are heightened,
Using the strength and courage I’ve been cultivating to make that step (or leap)
To recognition of a lesson peeking out from the rubble of a mistake.

Mine were, in no particular order

Preparation, communication, setting and community

Did I really prepare my local community for what I was embarking on?
No, I did not explain what I was doing thoroughly.
Was the setting of meeting new family and old people in a house where 4 languages are spoken daily to get all communication clear, really the best place to take a vow of silence?
No.
Was I myself ready? Stable enough in who I am
to withstand the pressures of others all around me?
Or to maintain silence in the face of a panic attack?  
I didn’t know until I tried.
And the answer was no.

And *that is happiness.
Being able to take the gory and daunting turn of events that is
Making a mistake
Into
Relinquishing myself from self hate
Recognizing old patterns of destruction
Ushering in new ones of growth and peace
Embracing the fact that i can feel myself laughing
at the ludicrousness of it all           despite parts of me wanting to remain angry

Having compassion for those around me
Including myself -

A Being,
Happy.

I am a medicine unto myself
from the earth I rise
bringing down the airy heights
living side by side
inside I am alive
in me life breathes!

I beat feet
to the rhythm
that lives within silence,
where all begins.

Living here , can't help but move*
sailing each course with the gifts of divine love anchoring
mixtures of light and dark.
                   focus
                                    Living here , can't help but move
         away from the moments of unrest , sculpting each moment of this day into beauty with my hands, thoughts and kisses.

Living here , can't help but move
Swirl like laughter round the tea cup of herbs
move into the space where it's a heartbeat
dust off the dust.
                                       Living here , can't help but move
It's a dawn that breaks ,  swallowed up by the mid day sun , here on this planet , it's like the sky is chewing very slowly
open , close.

Loving here means i do the same too.
open , close.
open , close.

Carcass of an old
Self
Death paves way for
Regeneration - a service gifted
Within one generation
Without alienation
Dips and follies only culminate in the diamond from coal

My heart sits where he sits
Now, I'm the same wounded healer
No night time dealers beware
We know survival skills -
We are soft but we could ****
Touch the hummingbirds wing
Send fear running  
We quick , we cunning

Evade the fortress walls
Tumble the towers with rose petal showers
Weapon of choice - a smile
Business card states that I spread love and he spreads laughter
You know we ain't after cash
But that's the whiplash

Anyway
We were born to play , so we play it well , better than I'd care to tell
Stay humble leave no room to grumble
Keep the tune light , till we ignite the daytime night

My soul is his soul and his soul is mine
It's not essential so we ignore space and time
No way to express the words that don't flow when the energy exchange is enough to know , my child's father

My lover is harmonies peals and sweet serenading appeals
I , gift , me unto you , the wrapping is golden but the present is still hidden
A surprise for the patient wounded healers healed in each other- ready to heal anew

Both of us - asleep in our parallel worlds under the umbrella of ambient lighting
A shameless copy of the pure sunlight
That emanates from their bodies
When they collide on the material
Plane .

Beg
sometimes
please
dripped pleasure
a game of chess
pieces, our bodies
board, the cosmos

River soft merging
with adored gentle
roughness, seductive
riffs abound

forever are the courses running closed , to be in their eternal mind a fool to think things end
they only ever stop to start again,
finish to begin
anew afresh
thunderous rains slap at the pavement from the 15th floor
sheets are seen
moving in their own cyclonic storm whirls
nevermind the sky scrapers or monorail
hit hard at the concrete creepers scaling the air

less a jungle more mountain chain of robotic tendencies

Walking around amsterdam airport with a bag smelling like tea tree oil a flight, a bus , a coach and a 25 min walk to go  ---

but for now,
I'm standing in the wrong line.

                                                          ­                       Twice.

He calls me out in 53 seconds bursts/
Stinging laughing tears trickle jump ooze --

It was only a matter of time until he would see this deeply,

only I didn't think it would feel so much like
questioning what it is I actually want from my actions and why I'm destroying so much to get there.

Or finally knowing that my self consciousness manifests as a narcissistic, heavy missile on the other side of existence.

Or that I'd be thanking him, even through this blurred pain in my chest.

That I would push away just to feel that tidal pull of love's metaphysical gravity spool and spin , turning vortexes, drawing me back to him as the worlds we built burn , rendered to fragrant ashes.

Some where else
it feels different,
lighter...

In the world behind my eyes
landscape weather systems....

swierall /
cloaouudss! We are playing
despite the uncertainty
still,
life lives her vibrant hues through me.
watchu playin at fool !!
Dance where the music is , let her 10pm sunset strokes caress you to sleep.

My centre's essence clear water sustenance
ready to flow through these charred veins,

giving myself over to mystery,

you are further away then you've been             still
geographically I'm the closest I've been to you since last.

board the plane

love rushing forth for the angered tiredness from your voice  runs rings round my mind,        
                             prompts me
          I'm praying now, in ernest, to Great Spirit that I may have the humility and strength, humor and vision in this becoming....

time is shushing me now,
                                                     give yourselves the healing space, she croons as I sleep sailing through the atmospheric ocean.

are arguments like a paradox?

does one just not compute the others message or emotional language
surely , there - just like languages are vibrations we can not understand but can feel
and perhaps learn to feel them a new , akin to learning a new language .

this would mean that things that are seemingly at first 'taboo' 'secret' 'cult like' 'mystical' especially these things

could just not fit

within my lock , akin to the enzyme molding and shifting shape for only particular proteins

could the human social structure not operate along this natural blue print? since the social structure too , is a part of nature and looking around us - something seems sorely wrong

the violence , well i'm not sure
yet why that is a base instinct but  

there is laughter inate too and smiles

so ...

what thinks ye?
of the words is have structured ?
does it make sense? does it resonate?

heck i'd like to know - how many of ya'll is the crazies?

We are only at the threshold
as humanity we stand , teetering on the edge , a fork in the road , what does 50 years away look like?

Every mind , body and soul counts - creating our collective reality , we all matter much more than we currently stand for , under the bulging , bulbous stench of dictational media, our priorities rest on worn out laurels and a crumbling podium stretched out into the abyss of ego

how many people can smile due to an action you make today?

currently my standing is at 2, but i hope to make that at least 15 by the end of the day

Tears are but wisdom distilled . in physical form .
I have already drowned myself , with angry drops
Christened with splashes of joy
To sleep after i exhausted the water supplies
To drift into worlds i hope will soothe me,

But my dreams are edged with fraying tension ,
this is too much , is there no respite , despite this

i think , it's just learning how to relax again after being tense for so long

A long winding road with many *** holes - really , has no one tended to the infrastructure ? - but i do not walk alone
this is divine comfort in the highest
i have passed through the myriad of messes from childhood depression

to emerge blinking - safe on steady ground
i thank my lucky stars to have been blessed with such emotional struggles - for it has given me the perspective , the faith , the desire to out live and out last any ******* .

I didn't realize i would deal with it all now , despite the therapy...it really was my own heart that healed herself

and i won't wait till i'm old and on a shelf to sort out this mess inside of me , i won't let it fester

no time like the present !!
no time like the ****** present !!

when i'm around you
       i feel the slow   paced    bass   line of the universe moving....

i can hear the galaxies turn
      and the atoms cascade as waterfalls in my mind with your electric fingers tracing my spine.



I am lightning without thunder, but you are not thunder nor the rain.

But a swift wind accompaniment to my silent flashes,

Wrapping the electricity with invisible peace .

*Do you know how beautiful it is to have someone that want to work with you? To take you for all you are and still manage to find the beauty in what you dreamt to be your ugliest scars...

showing beauty in the dark....

( yes, it seems  you too are another good one who knows the value of darkness...it seems many of us who seek this path do these days) *

---


We are
     the shimmer of light that reflects in the deep hollows of flute pipes      
echos around the womb like space of cosmos microcosm .

(I've felt love before , but this....this is not love as i used to know it..

This is a slow boiling , stewing and ripening with age mulled wine with toast and Camembert kinda thing )

----

Did you know coincidentally , your name is in the number 2013
and if i recall correctly ,
13 is the year  i met you in.

It's charming how these clever little signals appear when i'm around you -
contemplating you they emerge , another experience.


........

But in my space , i see the purpose here too -

perspective.

Because when i'm with you , it's pretty much just you.

(and whatever room we happen to be in ) - sometimes other things do appear but they are easy to dissolve.
---


we put definition on the imagination , sharing and the quest.... and that's one of the things i enjoy the most.

Peace x

The intention of deeds need no intention at all. The drive, the force that powers the sun is the same force that powers the very actions that we take.
In all it's glory it asks for no reward, other than the privilege to be.

It’s already on the way out that’s how I see letting go, all that is required of me is to make space for whatever it is to leave. Something else is coming anyway, that’s nature. Nothing ever dies it transmutes. Everything is evolving through transmutation anyway. It’s harmony ya’know?
It’s the harmony to the melody
same same but different
interconnected but all of it’s own.
That’s how exploration lives
jumping from one harmony to another

Sweat coats us both

as animal sounds emerge

inside each others ears.

kiss after kiss falls onto my lips and shoulder , neck and lips , lips and cheeks , cheeks and chest.

hungry , we dine on one other.
background music , is the lily pad fountain and our outward reaching vibrations.
we are wolves who have not eaten for weeks
we devour each other
breaking down constructs of what can and can not be , we waiver the space-time laws and escape to the cloud castles where a lightning storm rains down golden pink hues of sunrise, shaded by the brilliant blue of a new dawn .... illuminating us from within.

Whenever we gently land onto Earth  , oh so crystalline ,
we are coated with serenity.

                                                      ­~

My mind meanders to how this may be...?
....... that love would so shyly creep up on me , to break on me like a thunderstorm finally filling the humid air with heavy, anticipated raindrops.

   I eagerly tell my 12 year old self that she doesn't need to worry....
Disney is a fraud and what is passion without strength and stamina?

Fruition of a growing closer that is only achieved with patience , time  a willingness to overcome the fears of oneself
so the other may see you, in your already perfect brilliance
as you come to terms with your own magnificence,

With a heck of a lot of past history uncovered in sacred spaces ,

wings outstretched , scents of toast and peanut butter , amazonian amethyst or desert desserts, are the tempter tempting - why say no..

Even prior notions to what may or may not have been,
are extinguished in the moments notice ,
what course , ran this tide,  seemed pre-ordained to meet again.


he appears ~
and it seems that if he decides one day to dissipate back into the ether
then there would be trail marks of poems , and astral realms of dedication to cloud kingdoms and fluffy rooms , with hidden portals

and ya'know
it would be a crying shame , i tell ya , we gots too much
to share and too many midnight snacks and dances in mountains , and treks under oceans trenches ~ but i live with the notion of

if it is not mine , i will not have it
and if it is , then it is only that.

Wisdom from mother earths roots -  connections - directions - reflections - mirror image in time and space , parallel companions on the human planetary face - take many shapes and forms,
and this life time is a reincarnation of my last incarnations , short span.

time gives us the patience
and if life gives us the gracious attitudes needed to peruse the horizons of
bliss and the horizons of motions illusionary

spell is undone , traveling ----- in motionless zen meditations.

for the seekers often find more then they set out for

in the least expectant of places.

Spontaneous renditions and silly faced magician , with gentle words whispered,
secrets healer
and emerald , black light bearer of truth observer
and crazy hair curls

Sounding out the scripture
of a leaf heartbeat
i was weeding in the garden, found one that had flowers blooming on the back of her leaf that was no longer than my pinky finger,
a row of tiny dusty blue beings lined up along the spine
and this creature was to be destroyed?
i couldn’t pull up any more.

There i am soothed.
a still sensation stops by me and offers me a breath
emanating from the earth between my toes and the chest high basil i’m trimming.

sleeping pill
on sleeper trains overnight to andaman adventures
or on bus rides to and fro to mountain heavens
naps in car rides to taxi number of 411 and 611

awake for the sunrise only to sleep through the day , lazy beach walks
spent weeks in hammocks that bleed
family tree spreading down the roots have been found

peace to the world
is peace in the now
peace is won , my friend the doldrums do end
the pacific shores rise east and west surface
marvel a glass marble containing clouds swirls and tropical flowers
balloons float skywards
no choice but to let them float , and flow
with the change of pace , the change of place , forge on ahead
forging the sword in the fire flames cut the hair
change the name
invent a new game
play old games
if you dare

they have are old and friendly , they wise
to know the place that is truly home , can't choose your family but then they are just old friends

pressure breaks eventually
patience
patience
patience

Today's sunset tints the air thick and orange , clothes stick to the skin as skin sticks to the air

it's sticky to say the least -
the thunderstrom clouds light up shades of violent violet and dusty sahara pinks and sand dune yellows

the sky , so blue is covered by high altitude brushes of greyscale hues and whisphers of floating away dreams
splitting at the seams with reality's crest on breast
the sea breeze whips up the trees and a respite from the deep heat of day as night slinks in

Frogs stand , eyeing the ending oceans touches
             Fruit on shoulder - woman walks in front of tanning visitors from far off places
here to grace the island with beach novels and naps.
       Zip wetsuit , speedboat serenade attempts in vain to drown the roar of ocean and soft coo of dove
nor splash of body in pool or the glimpsed brief conversation in passing from no faced strangers

Low and conspicuous hang the cumulus cloud , or could be base of thunderstorms stiring brew.
          Return , Re - Turn to open ended , natural flow of water lines and bike bells toll , to late night samba and leave the propaganda , tender touches and daytime lunch , with night time conversational munch .

Beauty is a priority not a luxury
no flower blooms for the ones with cash
no flower blooms for the profit made on each petal

no moon etched night sky wears a for sale sign
no azure blue sky gives change
apart from the fleeting expressions of cloudscapes

The tears are but distilled wisdom

After the release

after the release


and the rains soft drops have dusted the sandy soils with her salt kiss tears

there
in the  desert of desire felt the rains of faith

and how the mist rolled in across the ocean
there , the plants still grow at the edge of the fog - where the mysteries still lie vacant

yet unfulfilled
but many in the making

a soup.

And over here is the present kitchen !  ///...\\

For all the women in my family who have come before me.

I vow now
to give myself the space to be kind to myself when I am faced
with our family pattern of self-hate

I will not spit in my face and demolish myself
I will stand with forgiveness
dripping from my eyes

I vow now
to utilize the opportunity
I have been given
of being free from the burden of being molested or ***** as a child,
I vow to respect myself, share my body with this respect
give my partner this respect and dance
the life giving creation song       with a heart

fleshy and vulnerable
landscapes of plains and bayous rising up across my skin, my folds will nestle medicine gardens
Inside of my ears I will plant Ceder trees

I will step into my strength, into my power I will rise
like a hot air current moving from the land up to the sky to form storm clouds
in a system of elegant design

I recognize
with this mighty power comes the power to be gentler still
so whilst the storm plays her play, I will also maintain
the quivering softness of a spring stream
high up in the mountains green
long grass wildflowers
melt from within me

fragrance heavenly.

For all of us I vow
to live a life where I utilize the power I have inherited
and I thank you
with these actions,
I write your songs in my movements
Your strength, poise, grace, ambition and genius has not gone in vain
Your stories live on inside of my veins

with these words I call out to you.

iI don’t wanna fix you , I wanna heal you as you heal me Inadvertanly , we do it anyway because we are happy I wanna feel you , as you feel me I wanna know you as I know me I wanna touch you , on metaphysical planes And see the star’s shine out of your *** , as you see mine Fly with me, my love , fly with me to the unkown lands where time hold no power Where the flower is preserved in the desert mist And the animals are small and the trees are big Where penguins live on land and zorros hunt I’ll keep you warm in the winter nights so we can fall asleep at sunrise Or maybe tonight we’ll get to bed before twelve and see sunrise instead And salute the sun with our yogic bodies Lets see the town built on the hillside , precious gems of house, stand blue and pink , perhaps we can walk the cobbled streets and stop for a drink; in the stand up bar sipping coffee or whisky who knows how far We can travel the lands by plane or by car Lets hold hands as we stare at the galaxies underbelly in a desert where there has never been rain We’ll welcome in the water to the dry drought that’s awashed our planet, They say We are emerging from a mini ice age , that is a drought of warmth, of love, of feeling Some call it the Kali Yunga either way they prohacised this Lace like web is splendid for all to see , all to share Lets build a world for us where we can care Lets make a business of our happiness and smile: Smile at your smile so you can smile at mine , endless smiles Until I kiss your soft lips as the rains fall and we don’t mind getting wet at all I remember you said you hadn’t met anyone who didn’t mind getting wet like that , or something along those lines and how time flies Our futures collided the day we met , infact we’ve been waiting for this we’ve been building for this , if we had met any sooner any later there wouldn’t have been a chance in hell , we needed each other then more than ever And so we answered the call and prehaphs that can be our greatest contribution our humble contribution to this revolution , the full cycle Our love child I feel like with you , my future could never be dim , traveling whilst sitting still Evoking the unkown in our hip hugs and our last hugs I wonder if anyone else has felt this before? The great wonders we’ve found at the shores of lust and the shores of greed and the shores of plentiful need Will you heal the world with me? We will heal what we can and no more For me , that is plenty

Inflow
Ex flow
system

positive feed back
in a negative loop

hyper sped on the electric boop

beep .

awoken to car horns and sirens wail
Odysseus could no longer feel his left foot , right...
is that the one where they sing those songs and the mermaids eat them up ?

is that the sphinx in scuba gear?

freediving?!!

Follow the beat through.

When i learnt tennis , my point to work on was follow through ,
now
i see ..... played out in my life.
The wonderment of a follow through.

Oh what pleasure , to meet the kindred gatekeepers, with raspberry chocolate on a dream beach , with mirage water..... way out , shifting lake light blue to deep oceanic aqua.

Sand made out crystal , old glaciers roamed here , leaving in their wake ice pathway earth carvings that are now lakes.
The shield is up north , pure crystal. Unlike Bali beaches , with miniature coral atoms in the sand mix.

We sit and laugh , a hollyhawk , Rainbow deer , Earth tree mountain lion and I a Sky Albatross , humming the sound of ancient code into Dr Who time dreams.
Where we flow and merger - align each other - heal , give , beckon to ourselves to come forth , higher self crystalize!!

We all touch differently,

                     arriving at situations step ,

           dance -reaction to the current atmosphere, we've all jumped. We've all landed. We've all felt
the other side of being human.
Careful not to time travel too much  , then we get stuck in the loop of always moving to nowhere.... Land AHOY!

We , i can feel , are all in the throws of a well navigated land - the Hawk's message from 2 and a half weeks ago -
Received.

The corners are no longer so sharp , the waves no longer as fearful , we fellow beings stand at the entrances end showing the way through to eternity.

Transitions still in progress, nearing completion. 22nd of April - a date to watch. 1 year traveling. Time to reap those seeds!
Yippiee!

Heavy metal never really called my name
What have we come from?
Where are we goin?
Information at fingertips
helios
sunshine

moonshine
chromeshine


writing , for writings sake
No prescription - the session is free

for the
meaning to fit the key of the lock of knowledge and wisdoms fruit
gems
are the segments of an orange.

Who knows -
maybe this is best
the fleeting but perpetual motion
vibrant motions.

to whom do these shirts and clothes am i wearing belong?

=

A beige coat , with the old mans jumper.
and the best friends tshirt cut at the ends with whales on them
just riding the waves
in the floating oceans shores
drifting kind sifting but with intentional grace
slow
or fast.
Horns blast.

=

open

=

ding . ding . ding.
level unlocked !!!!!

=
boom ,, de la bot

robotics.

Ghosts in Machines....

ha,
ha
.

Dreamers dreaming the impossible
possible

dreamers asleep awake
alive and free

dreamers who answer calls
dreamers who know it all
dreamers with the music you need
dreamers who give you love in need

no matter what


if anything
this is the biggest lesson i've ever learnt riding on this ship

that sometimes you can choose your family
and they are your friends
and that. IS respect.

we walk on sacred ground
inside and out

so mad respect to you
and you
and all of you who pervade the all seeing ocean of cosmicness nice doin buisness

don't mess , tease and test hotline to humor is the peruser of this horizon

and i see we've reached land

we're all dreamers - ghosts driving machines

how many ghosts are drifting into machines these days

i wonder where our perspective can change , when we DARE to dream

;)

any dream
any time

day dream s
reality's gleam , bright awake alive like a sunrise with wine and cigarettes

surveying the coastal horizon  

these people are all calling

screams and screams maybe your not tuned vibrational yet to the symphonies of earths war cry

the sleeping dragon has awoken

you dared to touch her jewels , her gems

you fools.

mine anything- but do not touch her babies

and no
i'm not talking about diamonds - they are not that rare- it's where you value more than money when it shows who cares

there are whole PLANETS made up of diamonds

we talking about home - ourselves

how rare is life ?

well for all we know

we could be the only ones

and we spend time killing each other?

I am the executioner
i have come to give you your wake up call

we are here to do a job

what?  i know what i'm good at ..... (1)


fighting the enemies of truth

i stand for justice

served fairly


Karma is time

i'm talking past lives now

anyway

the point is

we've all got a reason
to be here

go find it

( it- may just be a person too )

or several people ?

or everyone ?

or for no one
ghosts in machines

whatever .

i just wanna say peace
this is my peace which i wrote primarily for me
and we wrote it together
all of us


we need peace
and we need quiet

the old kingdom is crumbling

we are
new

we are the ones who choose

we become our own judges
and executioners

we become our own best friends in the darkest of times
and someone once said

the sun always rises

and what a beautiful that maybe sunrise was

just like black magic

call me the magician

my name is SYD.

and i live in all of you .

humor is the hotline ,
to the whole centre consciousness

Here's a joke:
What's left when all the mistakes have turned to dust , blown away by winds of change?
A fine sculpted piece of consciousness and three eyes with vision expanded.

I am made of flesh
i am soul baked out of hearts oven
wearing the hat of kinds
my hair  ,

swimming in the soupy soup fog of earth - level living
cosmic astronouts
mhmm
i guess i could be a queen
or a princess
but i know i'm only a molecule
in the ether

which , is my 5th element and is yours still...

i have no more faith then for those who stick with me - and see me , i my lowest hour to my highest high , even if they weren't there physically at the time

with war , we assume peace is a scary notion ,
that peace is worth killing for - worth maiming for , worth spitting at.

Peace is an idea that steals children from homes , and taxes from banks to the pocket of rank, and fee and file and fickle thumbs , where the money rolls plenty in the pockets of some.

Godly
fires
the wind does rain on earthen mothers terrain \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

filling up holes in small time souls
who sit in the whiplash of desert !

Pumpink Pie - SMILE ;)

follies, follies , follies -
stick with us - we'll show you some more/

from

The GentleMans cLUB.

- ANON

Fatal.
Femme Fatal , seduced by ulterior
motives, the truthful warrior
Kills with peaceful intention
but it is only wicked nonchalance
to; day to day ferocities that mimic hard time , war time , conventions

Lemon yellow pieces of firefly bisquits
Rain down from the fogged fetters.
Lyrical
haze- in soft beat
cheetos

Where sunshine, headlights on fusion cars (expell) expose
the water particles

Suspended in animation - falling- in
slow motioned elegance
like after a shower with the doors and windows closed
the soupy soup soup
of swimming in wavey air...

how does it rain?


how does it shimmer and sprinkle- ease the tensions
between skies pressures
and ground lessers
impulse actions
allow trajectory placement
true aim -
exists.
In the quiet flicker of heartbeat syncronizational blip.
only pre-destined by present fates , do we sing , and dance the life samba
whilst ******* the night with our eyes, the moons ripples cascade into waterfall turrents
and sink into sinkhole underbelly of cavernous , decadence
grand caverns , without owners name
natural built caves of crystaline exuberance
bigger than you
bigger than me
just two duckies sitting in an awfully large ponf
*pond
we're nothing but dust motes
yet look at at what we are !

To be certain there is a way of life that exists in the languid.
Nature never hurries and yet all gets done.
This is not a tapping into, this is not an extraction process , this is not mining of internal resources. This is a growing.
Sometimes I speak of resistance to myself, I notice and catch all the smallness of life, the small distinctions of this and of that. Sometimes I get annoyed way too fast, at life, way too fast at not getting what I want

time is gentle,
time is gentle,

Slowly there is a shifting, slowing down there is a moving sifting through I get the feeling, I’m becoming my own dreaming.
Here amongst the cavernous forum of my lie , the sky sings slowly moving shifting always gleaming, turning swiftly dancing slowing fruit is ripe I am my friend , I need the daring friend friend friend, there is something, moving so slowly resitance to my yearning chasam. I turn off now, I don’t have to take it all on though, even though I feel it’s mine, this is not our slighted journey, this is not our reasonable rhyme, for the darkening, for the lightness, and the color that arises when they meet, I am the child of our aunties and uncles.
give chance
make peace
with the wide open skies
of the southwest
and the land where your brother and sisters fled
and their blood seeped into the land
harboring their empty spirit until the time would come

I align myself with the cycles of the cosmos
I acknowledge my shadow
                           my bright self
i bypass negativity to expansion
        i trust the hidden helpers on my quest
as well as those in plain sight

thoughts to hold
loves to behold
darkness gives way to light

night gives way to sun shine bright
and tides give way to the shores stretching hidden and revealed
covered , concealed and re-appealed at moons suggestions

inevitable turns and motions projected
yet not the same components whence this building was erected
stand here today new memories and presents
projected onto walls and floors
breezes and floating flowers , plastic bags and in need of showers
sweating from the humid city evening hours

powers are working
people are churning
cities belly is not burning
but dance
little ants of power dance

in your one lined solo group style flow
of natures voice still heard in cities loop holes

i , am safe , i am full , i am empty i am souls

i exist many– a feeling

a being
a way
a path
a love
I am not just perfect golden child material.
My sustenance is born of so much more
My selfishness,
my pride,
these
sinful vanities give me motion and are within me something I must love
not fear
send me my love
send me my love send me my love
send me my love
and let my flower bloom still where the light is not
deep down dank hate is rotting away
and I say nay,
I say nay, I still bloom there , even though my mother  told me it wasn’t ok, for 19 years!
Forget her , she’s learning still,
Nay ! I am still beautiful, crown woven dark and bright,
yellow and pink , brown and orange
Dance and sing
Flush out the rest
No more , no more , no more hate
Festering festering
Festering.